Live Every Day As If It Was Your Last!

Thank you, Dr. King!

2012-01-16T08:14:00.000-08:00

While today is a "vacation" from school, it is an important day to stop and reflect about Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. There are lots of video clips about Dr. King and children are learning about him in school. He is certainly an important historical figure for our country.

Yet this morning I was reflecting about the day he was assassinated. I was 20 years old at the time. I will never forget the horror of that day. It was unthinkable.

Dr. King managed, through non-violent measures, to move this country to start to make our constitution a living, breathing, reality-based document by insisting that all people are created equal and are endowed by their creator with important civil rights.

He left a personal legacy for me as a member of a primarily African-American church. I have new empathy for the stories of discrimination that surround me each Sunday. He has also left me with "food for thought" as one of his saying stays with me every day.

I love this quotation by Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.:

"Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter."

What a great reminder!

God bless!

Love Linda

So Grateful...So Blessed!

2011-11-14T09:26:00.001-08:00

While it is always hard to let go of summer with its relaxed way of life, I love the Fall.

After all, it's Bert's favorite season. This cozy time of crock-pot soup, mums of orange , red and yellow gracing our home, throws pressed around us as we read by the fire, putting up white lights in our outdoor trees, watching leaves twirl and dance...it is ALL such a blessing.

And winter is on the way. I can feel it in my bones. The frosty nights have brought crinkly leaves in my gorgeous outdoor planters. The old plants, who adorned lush containers, have wilted and are headed to our compost. They will help to nourish next year's crop.

The seasons they are a changing.

And I am changing too.

The truth of the matter is that I just feel happy and content right now. I am choosing JOY

in the midst of whatever is going on around me. I am choosing GRATITUDE no matter what.

I am putting my hand in the Lord's hand at every turn, knowing that I don't know the whole story...but He does. I love the old spiritual that says:

"Put your hand in the hand of the Man who stilled the waters,

Put your hand in the hand of the Man who calmed the seas.
Take a look around and you will look at others differently,
by putting your hand in the hand of the Man from Gallilee."

Here are a few things I am grateful for right now:

1) Our beautiful new granddaughter, Glory Sihin, graces our family with her smile, warmth and humor. I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE the picture with her that heads up this post.

2) Seeing baby Owen's smile..it can light up a room! His giggle fills my life with joy!

3) Seeing Emma run a cross country race and being there to yell for her.

4) Having Jenna stay over night and "cooking" with her on our pretend stove.

5) Seeing Bert go outside and shake the tree limbs so Jenna could see the leaves "dance".

6) Having a job I continue to love after all of these years.

7) Going Christmas shopping with Jessi.

8) Seeing Amy teach a class with such fun and expertise.

9) Seeing Tim, after breaking his neck, finally get his halo removed and having his bone scan show some new bone growth. Praise God!

10) Working on some fun Christmas presents.

11) Looking everywhere for inspiration for drawing my Christmas card for 2011. I often find a book, painting, book cover, Christmas window etc that I can use as an" inspiration piece".

While I love drawing, and wish I had "original ideas", I am more of a "I bet I could draw that too!" kind of gal.

12) Making all kinds of yummy soups in our crock pot. We are not letting anything go to waste and it's fun to try new recipes or make them up. Our autumn squash soup is to die for.

13) Anticipating going to the Nutcracker ballet with Emma and Jessi. I LOVE holiday traditions!

14) Getting up early for my quiet time and prayer time. I love holding others up in prayer!

15) Having lost 14 lbs. since last summer and my knee injury. Dr. Staley is even proud of me as I do a monthly weigh-in.

16) Putting up candles all over our home to add a soft light to our living space.

The list goes on and on.

Most of all... I am grateful to be alive, to have a new day to live for Him, and to have so many people in my life that I love to the moon and back!

God Bless!
Love Linda

Reconnecting with Myself: Carpenter Ants and Other Lessons

2011-08-19T03:38:00.001-07:00

It seems like F.O.R.E.V.E.R. since I have written on this blog. Part of me says,

"Well no one may read it."

Then I am reminded that I don't write this so others may read it.

Writing this is a way to sort out who I am...now.

Writing this is a way to look at where I am, where I am headed (off track again?)

I write this to have a tangible reminder of thoughts, events and priorities.

It's a time out to get back in touch with myself.

It's RE-CONNECTING that re-directs and re-energizes me.

This morning, as I stepped outside, I felt fall in the air. It seems like only yesterday that there wasn't a leaf on a single tree, and I was hoping that there would be a spring.

Now... the weeks are ticking off until school starts...again.

This summer has been different, and yet it has been profound. Babies born, a significant knee injury, a reconnection with myself and my sweet hubby, and finding serenity in getting the simplest of tasks completed. Who ever thought that exterminating carpenter ants could give such pleasure.

Yet they are symbolic.

Something is in your face, eating away at your home (or life), and will I ignore the obvious or take action? We took action.

This summer has been all about the little things.

When a teacher friend asks, "How was your summer? What did you do?", in the hope of hearing something fun, exciting, earth-shaking, or glamorous, I can honestly say...

"I cleaned out my car",

"I got rid of carpenter ants",

"I held Owen",

"I cried with Tim and held his hand after he broke his neck",

"I got a new John Elway knee brace",

"I helped at Amy's garage sale to help bring Sihin home",

"I sat in the sun and let the warmth permeate my face",

"I played poker at the lake with Ryan and Jacob",

"I went school shopping with Jessi and Emma",

"I went to an antique fair with Bert",

"I sat at the ocean with Sharon",

"I prayed and prayed and prayed for God's peace and guidance"...

the list goes on and on.

Simple things.

Slow down things.

Gratefulness of heart things.

Glad I am alive to do these things.

No one knows how many summers they have left. No one.

Some freak bike or car accident can end it all.

Suddenly being able to walk or turn your head is something sacred to appreciate.

And for the first time, really the first time, I am looking at when I will retire from teaching.

It won't be long.

It is on the horizon and I can see it coming.

So this morning, with fall in the air, my cup of coffee in hand, and the fireplace on...

I give gratitude for ALL things big and small.

ALL prayers answered in ways I couldn't predict.

I turn over my worries, my doubts, my hurts over to a God who is so BIG, so STEADY, so RELIABLE, so GREAT, so EVER-PRESENT...

and I am content to know He can handle it all.

I am blessed to be alive to see a new day and THAT puts a smile on my face.

God Bless!

Love Linda

TOUGH QUESTIONS...Simple answers

2011-06-18T05:42:00.000-07:00

WITHOUT

THE RAIN

THERE WOULD

BE NO

RAINBOW

What I know for sure is that I am not a wimp.

What I know for sure is that God does not give us more than we can handle.

What I know for sure is that I have always lived my life with courage and perseverance.

I am NOT a quitter.

Yet, what I also know is that there are seasons where the storms are abundant and the rain keeps falling. This is, literally and figuratively, one of those seasons.

At the end of a very challenging school year, and facing some daunting personal challenges, I have been asking myself lots of tough questions.

Here is a sample of one of my June journal entries...

"Recently, it hasn't been easy.

Recently, I have been in the business of having hard talks and setting hard boundaries.

Recently, I have had a heavy heart.

Recently, I asked Bert

"Why don't you think God asked someone else to do this?

Ya know, like someone younger, or smarter, or with more endurance

for really hard decisions? Why does it have to be so hard?

Why us?"

Bert's answer?

"God asked and we said YES."

I love it when it all boils down to one simple answer.

Deciding to say..."YES!!"

2011-05-21T09:50:00.000-07:00

"She decided to free herself, dance into the wind,

create a new language. And birds fluttered around her, writing "Yes" in the sky."

He gives and takes away...

2011-05-21T05:48:00.000-07:00

There is a song we sing at church where the chorus says:

He gives and takes away

But still I'm going to say

Lord blessed be your name!

It's this "gives and takes away" part that I'm struggling with right now. There are so many blessings going on and at the same time huge struggles. I have barely had time, or made time, to sort it all out.

Life feels a bit like a whirlwind, a roller coaster, and I am ready to get off and have a respite.

Simply put, I once again need to-

"be still and know that I am God!"

I'm not sure why I continue to forget that God really is in control...even in, or especially in, the vortex of the storm. It's all about really trusting Him!

It has not been easy to keep my equilibrium. I feel a bit tossed and torn.

The givings have been amazing:

Jessi had her beautiful son Owen :) and I was there to be part of the miracle of his birth.

Jess, Rog, and Emma are now...

Jess, Rog, Emma and Owen

What a blessing to my heart.

Seeing a brand new baby brings hope and joy and the promise of new beginnings.

Holding him close brings back memories of the precious new babes I brought into the world.

The take aways?

There is a long list

The names and events, like losing Lilly, are etched in my heart.

The bottom line is simple:

Just when I think I know how life will turn out-

It all changes.

Yet I need to remember...

One Thing Does NOT Change...

God's stays the same.

He is the great I AM!

He is in control.

And He loves me deeply and forever.

He is my rock in any whirlwind and my hope in any storm.

Nothing can change that...NOTHING!

So this morning I will rest in the hope and love of Jesus.

I will place my faith in Him!

I will remember that in Christ..."All things are possible"

And I will celebrate those possibilities!

God Bless!

Love Linda

Wow...Does that really describe me?

2011-04-09T06:17:00.000-07:00

Yesterday was one of those days that takes your breath away! First of all, it was Friday. Not just any Friday, the Friday at the end of the first week of this quarter. All teachers know what I mean. The first week is the week of "explanations" and "here's the drill we all need to follow."It's the week of establishing a "climate" in a classroom. It's the week when teachers roll their eyes at each other in the hall, and we all know what that means. "Dear God", I pray, "please get me to Friday!"

Not only was it the first Friday of the quarter, it was sunny out. We are not talking summer sunny as in it's 70 degrees. It's freezing, in the 40s, but it's glorious. There is a sun, and it's shining in Spokane!

Yet this Friday was a little different. As I was getting ready to leave my classroom, a student was still in class. This is someone I've had for several quarters, like, and feel has great potential. As the student was gathering their things and preparing to also leave, they commented, "please give me feedback about (fill in the blank). You give brutal honesty and are known for that."

Now understand that this is a paraphrase and perhaps not their exact wording. However what is exact are the words brutal honesty.

Frankly, I was stunned.

More than that, I was speechless.

Now please understand that I am not writing this post to in any way disparage the student.

They were just putting their own truth out there.

This was their experience of me.

Do I imagine that their interpretation of these two words "brutal honesty" fits mine exactly?

Probably not.

After all, I have taught communication skills for more than 40 years.

Word choice is personal and words often do not mean the same thing from one person to the next. I was too stunned at the time to simply say, "I wonder what you mean by that?"

I may, in fact, ask that question on Monday. Yet in that classroom moment on Friday I was left with a hollow feeling that I may have a "blind spot" about how my honesty impacts others.

It left me to thinking.

Truthfully, the word honesty doesn't surprise me. Over the years I have found myself

being more truthful, even when it isn't popular. But what others may not know, and often goes unseen, is that before I utter a word I have often spent hours thinking about how I would say something to someone that was at once telling the truth and yet is kind in it's approach.

In the last few years I have had numerous "crucial conversations" that were long overdue. When I finally had those long-overdue talks, I had my back against the wall. There was no way to get out of saying what had to be said. I had postponed saying what needed to be said for as long as possible. I was honest about some hard-to-hear "stuff." I own that. I was honest.

Honest I get.

But brutal?

WOW. Does that really describe me?

Brutal sounds vicious.

Brutal sounds deliberate.

Brutal sounds mean...at least to me.

When I was in Grad School at Whitworth, getting my second Master's Degree, a faculty member by the name of Ron Short gave me an important life-lesson that addressed the issue of overbearing honesty. He said, "What we are about in this program is "straight-talk." We are not about subtle manipulation, or guessing games, or I should know how you feel, what you need and what you want if you don't tell me." "Yet", he went onto say , "straight talk won't make you popular. For those who are about being right, it may make them defensive. Others may feel that you are mean, when in fact you are taking care of yourself by telling your truth."

Can I get an "Amen!" for that wisdom?

Another communication specialist once said, " An effective communicator tells the truth, but tells it with kindness."

I guess that last statement summarizes my goal. As a college teacher and human being I am called to give feedback. Sometimes that isn't easy. It may, at times, even hurt the feelings of my students, friends, or family. Yet I want to be clear about my goal in every interaction.

My goal is to help, not hurt. My goal is to motivate my students to move to the next level of excellence, to challenge themselves to "up the bar" of expectations they might have about their classroom performance. My goal with other people, outside the classroom, is to be congruent and authentic with tact, love and respect.

Yet can my words, even though well thought out words, "sting."? Yes, they can.

Do I need to be careful about the intensity of my communication, my non-verbal gestures and the "tone" of what I say? Most definitely.

Is it useful for me to re-examine the truth I tell and how I tell it? Absolutely!

Am I grateful for the opportunity to re-think this issue.

Yes, I am.

What's my conclusion after all of this?

My re-affirmed goal is to do effective and kind straight talk, not brutal honesty. I want to tell the truth but do so with tact, politeness, and kindness! I am an ever-growing person and communicator. Like others around me, I still have lots to learn.

God Bless!

Love Linda

"When I'm 64!..."

2011-02-26T05:26:00.000-08:00

I am settling into being 64...the sound of saying it, the rhythm of knowing it, the sense of being it.

64 is not like being 60, it is being in your mid-60s. It is a chance for more wisdom, an opportunity for more growth. It feels like I am looking at life through new eyes.

As the song says, and the Bible reflects:

To everything

Turn, Turn, Turn

There is a season

Turn, Turn, Turn

And a time for every purpose under Heaven

Pure and simple, I am in a new season in my life.

There are inklings of a past season long ago. For some reason I am hearing from lots of former students, even as far back as 1971. Each of their messages warm my heart and remind me of the investment of time and love I have put into teaching.

It is still like that.

Teaching calls something from my soul. I am, perhaps, my most authentic self while in a classroom. I have felt "called" by God to be there. Those are sacred moments.

And there are moments in this new season of disbelief. Disbelief in how short this life really is.

I can hear, in my mind's eye, my Mom talking about the "losing season". That's the season when the reality of how short life is sets in. I am acutely aware at every turn that we are all "terminal" and that we need to "get our lives in order." While I am truthfully overwhelmed at the number of memorial services Bert and I are attending these days, and how many mournful calls we have had when someone's most precious life-partner dies, it is also a season of deep connectedness. As we hold each other up in times of loss, we open our hearts fully to who someone is to us.

And it is a season of prioritizing what matters.

For much of my life I have lived in fear of letting someone down.

I have anguished if someone was unhappy with me and how I chose to spend my time.

No more.

If there are people who are keeping lists of how I should have done more, or I should have made different choices...

Well, I just feel sorry for them.

My choices about how, where, and with whom I spend my time are just that, my choices.

I am resolved and at last at peace with the fact that...

I can't be everything to everybody. And I no longer want to feel pulled to do things in the fear that I will disappoint someone.

I want to be true to my God-directed choices.

And I know they will not all be popular.

This season is also a season of deep contentment and new beginnings.

Children to be born. Children to come from Africa.

It is a season of slow cooking and experimenting with new seasonings and

discovering and savoring the smells and sensations of healthy home cooking.

It is a season for crafting and sewing memories...designing quilts, making burp cloths

Anticipating the season of birth and new miracles to love.

This season of 64 is full of possibilities.

Most of all, I want each moment to reflect my love of my Lord.

I want to rest on Him in every trial.

I want to wait in anticipation of His precious hand on my life.

I want to see how He answers the prayers I whisper as I go to sleep.

I want to let Him rescue me from fear, heartache, and despair.

I remember when the Beatles first sang the song..."When I'm 64!"

I had no idea then how blessed my life would be now !

And may God hold you in the palm of His hand...

and give you peace!

God Bless!

Love, Linda

LOVE, LOVE, LOVE!! Say it! Shout it!

2011-02-16T07:52:00.000-08:00

I just cannot stop smiling when I listen to this song. I send its message to all of you, near and far, who are so dear to my heart. May you know how much I love you, how much you matter to me. May you know that YOUR love has made me whole.

To my dear family, my beloved Bert, my precious daughters, my darling grandchildren, my wonderful students, my dear friends...how you have ALL enriched my life.

I AM SO GRATEFUL!

May you spread LOVE wherever you go. It is in such short supply these days.

May there be love in the "good mornings" you share with those you walk by.

May there be love in the way you hold the hand of those you hold most dear.

May you know how short life is. Don't waste a moment of it in unforgiveness.

Tell those you love them that you love them

Let them hear it, see it, feel it in their bones.

May your smile radiate all the love you have in your heart for them.

Don't wait for a Valentine's Day to send a card or flowers

Don't wait for a birthday to send a note or poem.

Sing it, dance it, smile it, say it.

I AM SO GRATEFUL...for all of you and I love you to the moon and back!

God Bless!

Linda

The Last Gifts- "Holding Watch" for a Dying Friend

2011-01-29T06:47:00.000-08:00

Note 2/12: Dennis Keen died peacefully on Monday, February 7th, surrounded by loved ones. His memorial service was held on Thursday, February 10th, where hundreds of friends, family, colleagues, and students remembered this man of faith and integrity. I will miss him forever.

My heart is broken. I am losing my dear friend Dennis Keen to cancer. I have been his friend for 23 years.

Every morning I saw him at school as he was one of the "early birds". I have watched him battle this horrible disease with courage, stamina, resilience and GUTS! I am, beyond, what any words could ever describe, proud of him. He has been a warrior against this disease. He did chemo every week for close to 2 1/2 years.

And I am learning some powerful life lessons.

I am choosing, as my dear Mom called it, to "hold watch" for my friend.

I am not ignoring this part of his life because it is SO hard to watch him deteriorate.
I am holding his hand and kissing his bald head and telling him how much he matters to me (and to so many others).
I am making meals, baskets, cards and being "present" in this part of his journey.

And it isn't easy.

I am NOT pretending that this will have a pretty outcome here on earth. It won't.

Most of all I am so cognizant of what it means to have such a dear friend leave your life.
I am "holding watch" with other friends of his...crying, hugging, whispering his name to God as he inch-by-inch goes Home.

I have loved having the chance to reminisce with Dennis, laugh, and share stories.

One of the fun moments in this part of the journey with Dennis came after I had visited him at the hospital and realized he was in too much pain to sit up. I wanted him to remember, as he looked to the ceiling of his bedroom at home, how dearly loved he was.

So I decided to create a "quilt-like" ceiling card (to go on the ceiling over his bed). His friends at school could take a square of colored card stock and write him a message of hope and love. I used my scrap booking supplies to make repeat cards, cards that would have a theme and tie the quilt together. I used powerful tape to hold all of the squares together on the back side.

The card started on a table in the faculty lounge in Old Main. I left extra squares and a pen so others could share their love for Dennis and his wife Virginia, who also works at SCC.

The card grew and grew.

AND GREW!

As expected, some of the messages came from his inner circle of friends at SCC.

Other unexpected messages came from maintenance people who had heard that Dennis Keen, who always spoke to them and showed gratitude to them, was terminally ill.

When I delivered the card it was five feet tall and 14 feet long!

Message after message celebrated the large and small kindnesses that Dennis did every day!

Today I am headed to see Dennis and deliver a meal. I don't know how many visits I'll have left with him
Each one is a reminder that life is fragile and such a GIFT!
Each visit reminds me to live every day as if it was my last.
Each visit is a reminder to tell those I love that I love them.

Yes, I am "Holding Watch" for my dear friend and while it is hard, it is a great honor to be there.

God Bless!
Love Linda

A NEW YEAR and NEW HEALTH!

2011-01-09T07:36:00.000-08:00

Carrots on my blog? Healthy vegetables in the background?

What in the world is going on with me?

The lessons pour in, cascade in, and stare me in the face. One of the greatest gifts God can give us is a healthy body. The question is simple:

DO I TAKE CARE OF THAT BODY?

Anyone who knows me knows that I have, for my whole life, struggled with taking time for me, taking the time for healthy nutrition, and getting in enough exercise (although I still do a brisk walk for the first 20 minutes I am at SCC every morning).

NOT ANY MORE!! Sloppy nutrition and sloppy health habits stop here and stop NOW!

Last quarter I battled a bug for weeks and weeks, I had three round of antibiotics, and my doctor, husband, family members, students, and friend Sharon all gave me some tough love....it's time to say "No" to some things and "YES!" to my own health.

These are smart people. They love me.

I would be a F.O.O.L not to pay attention!

As I watch dear friends battle for their lives with cancer, and saw Dennis in the hospital this past week, I am reminded that the Lord also has some tough love for me on this issue. This is a precious body, His gift to me, and I have not been doing a good
job taking care of it. I may have some A grades in some other areas of my life, but I have a D- in this area. Shame on me!

SO...things have been a changin' at the Salisbury home!

**During December and January we have been keeping our crock pot out on the counter, it's aroma filling our home. We are experimenting with lots of healthy soup receipes! Our latest is a lemon-chicken soup with oregano and tarrigon.

**I am on a RIGOROUS, daily vitamin regiment. No excuses! Take those horse pills (all 8 of them), no complaining allowed. Thanks Boppa for helping me with this!

**Get more sleep. Yesterday I went back to bed and got another 2 hours of shut eye!

**Let go of old hurts. I know that what I hold on to impacts my health. It's time for a fresh start with some folks.

**Have more seafood in our diet. Last night I fixed a poached salmon and lemon dish that was out of this world! Today we'll also add some fresh cracked crab to that menu.

**Focus on having a healthy breakfast! I am eating oatmeal and a 1/2 banana every morning during the school week. Yesterday morning, for Bert and for me, I made a veggie fritata with organic eggs and vegetables.

**Try new receipes and have FUN with cooking! I do have fun cooking during the summer, but truth be told I have tried to skate by most of the rest of the year!

**I am reading books about nutrition, watching the food network, watching Dr. Oz, and making it a priority to...

change my thinking about nutrition!

For some folks, this may seem small and not a big deal. But let me tell you...

IT IS A BIG DEAL TO ME!

I would appreciate your prayers and any encouragement you can give me! Sharon, thanks for the care package you sent, all about self-care! It was right on target!

Yup, it's time to move toward a more healthy life style. After all...
next month I'll be 64! I want to make it to 74... and beyond!

God Bless!
Love Linda

A New Way To Celebrate The New Year! Start With Two Pages of Paper...

2011-01-01T05:39:00.000-08:00

Many people ring in the New Year with a fun party and a list of New Year's Resolutions. That list encompasses their goals for the year to come. While I love to set goals in every area of my life, and I always appreciate the "new beginning" a new year ushers in, every New Year's Day I do something just a little bit different. I thought I'd share this idea this morning, one I learned from a speaker on the Power of Prayer at the Cannon Beach Christian Conference Center. Here's a new way to usher out your "old year" and bring in the "new". This is also especially great to try with your children as it really helps them to focus on the power of prayer and being grateful for God's blessings.

So here's the exercise:

On the first day of every new year I get out two pieces of paper, some colored pencils and markers, and some stickers.

On one page I write the words:

"Thank You!" Page

On the second page I write the words:

Prayer Requests for the New Year

On the first page I thank God for all of the blessings He has given me during the last year. I even go back to my prayer requests from the previous year and look at what He has done and thank Him for all of the blessings.

When I look at my prayer requests as 2010 started I am AMAZED at how God came through, how the yearnings of my heart were answered, how He knew what I needed, even when I didn't. I've always thought that prayer was powerful. I pray every morning and keep a list of people to pray for and the specific needs that they have.
I also include my own specific requests. For example, one of my specific prayer requests every morning in 2010 was that Amy would get relief from the horrible pain she suffered as a result of a car accident. I asked God to bring a specific doctor, Dr. Weigle, to help Amy. I wrote this down on January 1, 2010. And low and behold, God is answering that prayer.

At the start of 2010, I asked God for healing in specific relationships (the details are personal) where all seemed lost and hopeless. God's healing in these realtionships has been nothing short of a miracle.

So, this morning on my "Thank You!" Page I have been writing down all the things I want to thank God for...all of the blessings bestowed on me, His daughter. I am thanking Him for my job, for my friendships, for help with struggles and relief from worry, for changes at work, for a new attitude, for optimism about an illness, for a new and closer relationship with HIm.

On the second page, I write down my new Prayer Requests for 2011. God promises me in Psalms that He is an "ever present help in trouble". He also promises me that He will know the cry of my heart and what I really yearn for.

Once again I am writing down prayer requests for myself and others...anticipating that in God's perfect timing I will once again see how He answers these prayers too.

I keep these pages from year to year so I can go back and look and see how God is moving in my life and the lives of those I love, care about, and am praying for! When I look at the list from 2009, I am amazed at His grace. As I write the list for 2011, I anticipate how He will answer these prayers too. I hold to the quote that if I have faith, even as small as a mustard seed, nothing shall be impossible.

And that, for me, is a GREAT way to usher in 2011!!
Want to give this a try? It's a meaningful way to grow your faith and see the power of prayer!

God Bless!
Love, Linda

Special Christmas Moments and a New Year's Wish for 2011!

2010-12-29T08:30:00.000-08:00

This Christmas vacation has been full of wonderful times of family fun, Christmas celebrations and remembering the birth of baby Jesus! Here are a few of those special "memory moments":

It was such a JOY this year to decorate our home inside and out! We made lots of Christmas memories by planting the bulbs for paper whites, making crock pot meals together and relishing those delicious, home-cooked smells that permeated the air. Once again, drawing and making my own Christmas cards was a treat. Lots of satisfaction in these simple Christmas moments!

We celebrated Christmas with the Farrell clan on Christmas eve at our home. We had a wonderful meal, talked lots, laughed often and opened presents. The best present was just being together! It is beyond wonderful to have time to connect with all of them. They all hold such special places in our hearts. 2011 will be a great year for their family as they bring their daughter Sehin home to Spokane from Eithiopia. We can hardly wait to meet her!

We loved sharing Christmas this year with the special Thompson family at Clinkerdagger's restaurant, a Christmas treasure all decorated with trees and sparkling lights! We all had a great time eating a delicious meal, opening presents, and creating new Christmas memories. We were overjoyed to learn on Christmas morning that their baby, due in May, is a BOY! What a special gift it is to await the birth of this miracle!

This Christmas break has also been a great time for Bert and for me to have some re-connection time after a super busy fall quarter of teaching and counseling. We've loved just hanging out, going to church, and having some leisurely time to look at all of the snow that blankets Spokane right now. Talks about our goals for 2011 have also been a priority.

We hope that you and your precious families have also had a chance to kick back and have quality time together, making some special Christmas moments! Also, as 2011 approaches, may you know God's abundant LOVE for you as He is the real "reason for the season!" May 2011 be filled with joy, peace, fun, and His love and grace!

God Bless and Happy New Year!
Love Linda

These Are A Few Of My Favorite Things...

2010-12-18T04:03:00.000-08:00

Since I was a little girl, I have always loved celebrations! Any celebration really. I love the first day of school and the last day of school. I love Valentines Day and Thanksgiving. I love birthdays, Veteran's Day, and the 4th of July. But most of all...I LOVE Christmas!

It isn't the rush to get consumers to buy, commercial-kind-of-moments that I love. It's the snuggle into a warm blanket and sip hot chocolate by the fire moments that I crave. It's the listening to Amy Grant's Christmas CD where she sings "Come Let Us Adore Him" with a new twist that leaves goose bumps-on-my-arm moments that stop me in my tracks. It's hearing the Bethel Choir belt out "God Rest Ye' Merry Gentlemen" with a gospel, praise-to-God intensity that is the real spirit of Christmas for me. It's going to the Tree of Sharing, getting the tags for a three year old girl and boy, and searching the stores for an African American baby doll that this sweet little girly can snuggle. It's finding a monster car and truck that will light up the eyes of that three year old little boy. I LOVE all these parts of Christmas.

Yet as much as hot chocolate, presents under the tree, Amy Grant singing, beautifully wrapped presents, snowy mornings, time with family, and dollies and trucks are a few of my favorite things... what I know for sure is that Christmas wouldn't be Christmas without my Jesus.

It's really, for me, all about the babe in the manager.

It's all about the gift of His child. It's all about a love SO great that it leaves me speechless.

Now please don't misunderstand...

It's not that I don't love searching for the perfect, jaw-dropping present for someone I love. I do love doing that.

And I find a huge satisfaction this year in turning our landscape into a winter wonderland of bright sparkling lights.

And I do love watching my precious grandchildren as they stare at the ornaments on the tree in such wonder.

And I do love bringing bird seed ornaments out into our trees so our little feathered friends can have a Christmas treat as well.

And I am adoring all of those moments where life-as-it-usually-is just

...stops.

But none of that is worth a hill of beans for me without Jesus.

I am particularly struck this morning by His gift of total forgiveness and amazing grace. When I don't feel forgiven elsewhere, when I feel so sad or perhaps even unloveable...He comes beside me with a gentle hand. His message is always the same. You are my daughter. I love you completely...no matter what. And He means the no matter what.

In life's twists and turns, ups and downs, He is always the same. He is the constant. He is there.

He is that baby in the manger, God's son, redeemer, forgiver, savior. And boy do I need saving.

His amazing grace saves me.

So as Christmas approaches, I will ooooh and aaaahhh over the delectable goodies at our feasts. I'll sprinkle nutmeg on my egg nog, knowing that egg nog will soon be off the shelves in the stores. I'll find just the right decoration for a package and get my fill of gorgeous Christmas music. I'll love this time of celebrating life, love, and a marvelous season of joy.

And I'll take peaceful moments to remember that the lasting "Joy To the World" is that "the Lord is Come".

I'll remember that it's really time to...

Let earth (and that includes me) receive her King. Let every heart (and my heart), prepare Him room. Let Heaven and nature sing. Let Heaven and nature sing. Let heaven and heaven and nature sing."

...and I am singing for my King!

God Bless and have a wonderful Christmas!

Love Linda

PS. The little seven year old girl, Rhema Marvanne, who sings Amazing Grace (my favorite song) in the clip at the start of this post, lost her Mommy to cancer in 2008, when she was just five. Both Rhema and her Mommy love Jesus!

A Different Kind Of Thanksgiving!

2010-11-27T04:18:00.000-08:00

Thanksgiving is one of my favorite holidays. It's a time to gather my thoughts and focus on what I'm grateful for. Yet this year there was a sense of unease in my heart. The wants and needs of those at SCC loomed over the campus. So many of our students couldn't afford to serve a Thanksgiving dinner to their families. Not only that, so many people in Spokane were homeless and struggling to have a Thanksgiving meal. Most days I knew all of this at a logical level. Yet somehow my heart couldn't rest this Thanksgiving knowing how blessed I was and the contrast in my life and theirs.

One club at SCC decided to help our students and have a Thanksgiving Canned Food Drive. They chose to make it a campus contest. That started the ball rolling. I set up my own contest in my four classes. We brought in four huge yellow plastic bins, and I challenged my four classes to compete against each other to see who could bring in the most food.

There were several conditions in the contest:

1) The class that brought in the most cans would get a party, and

2) I would personally match the total number of cans that the four classes brought.

Now mind you, lots of schools have canned food drives. What was different here was that many of my students are scraping to get by and bringing any cans would be a personal sacrifice. Many of these amazing folks needed food themselves.

We talked every day about gratitude, about what being a servant leader is about. We talked about helping the poorest of the poor, the homeless here in Spokane. After all, half of what we gathered would go to the SCC Food Bank, and the other half would go to the House of Charity in downtown Spokane. This is one of the places where Spokane's homeless would spend Thanksgiving. We talked about what goes around comes around and that giving to others who are less fortunate fills up your own heart.

Have I said lately that I have the most amazing students? Have I told you that they are generous and giving beyond belief? I have tears streaming down my face as I write this because I could NEVER, EVER have imagined the depths to which they would go to help others.

Several students emptied their own cupboards. Several students did extra jobs at school to earn money to buy cans. The huge yellow bins filled again and again and again. Our final total was 876 cans for the food drive.

Yet that was only part of the fun!

We decided to participate in making Thanksgiving dinner at the House of Charity. We were going to cook turkeys, bring down those cans, and help other SCC students make, serve and eat Thanksgiving dinner with those who are homeless.

Our first House of Charity run began at 4:30 am last Tuesday, November 23rd. Yes, you read that correctly, that was the day of Spokane's first snow "blizzard". At 4:30 in the morning we were gathering at the House of Charity, carrying our cooked turkeys through the snow in the toughest part of town. Our job was to peel potatoes, make green bean casseroles, and other traditional Thanksgiving dishes. Our meals would be serving hundreds of Spokane's poorest of the poor.

When I arrived at 4:30, the 4:00 crew was hustling and bustling. The meal would be served at noon and there was LOTS of work to be done. There were so many familiar faces, students I have in class, smiling, drinking coffee, and peeling potatoes so others could have a Thanksgiving meal. I will never in my life forget that sight. I had a blast working in the kitchen where we took the meat off of 27 home-cooked turkeys, putting light meat and dark meat in pans to be served to our new homeless friends. You should have seen the faces of two men who slept in a car outside of the House of Charity (all the beds were taken) when a group of chattering college students walked at 4:30 am on their way to the House of Charity kitchen.

And as if that wasn't enough, on Thursday, November 25th, Thanksgiving day, we did it all over again. Round two. More turkeys, more potatoes, and more amazing students. One of my absolutely favorite SCC students was at both events and even cooked his first turkey. He had been homeless himself a few years back and wanted to "pay it forward!"

So as I sit by the fire this Saturday morning , sipping my coffee and watching the snow fall, I have been thinking back on the last few weeks that have been filled with cans, contests, turkeys, students, and giving from the heart.

Was it a traditional Thanksgiving? No.

Was it one of the best Thanksgivings I can remember? Yes, it was.

Am I more than ever aware of all of my blessings? You bet I am!

It was a different kind of Thanksgiving this year, and it is one I will cherish and remember for the rest of my life.

God Bless!

Love Linda

SAVORING EVERY MOMENT!

2010-11-20T05:55:00.000-08:00

One of my students asked me a thought provoking question this week. She said, "How do you fit it all in? You seem so busy and your life is so full. Why are you still smiling when there is so much on your plate to do?"

My answer was short and simple. "As I get older," I said with a twinkle in my eye, "There are many more days behind me than in front of me. I know each day is precious. I want to pack each day FULL of wonderful activities so when it's all said and done...I want to have no regrets. And I want to do those tasks in front of me with a smile on my face and joy in my heart"

Erma Bombeck, an old comic and writer, put it best when she said, "Lord, until the very last day, let me use up every gift and talent you gave me so that when you call me home I can smile at you and say 'I used 'em all up'"

One of my life lessons in the past 63 years is that there will ALWAYS be lots of "things to do".

Yet I can do each of those activities with gratitude and positive intentionality or they can just be something I'm trying to hurry through so I can get them done and check them off my list.

I ask myself quite regularly, if this was my last day to live would I slow down and just appreciate the chance to clean up my kitchen? Would I feel joy that I have a refrigerator when so many in the world don't? Would I be grateful for the dishwasher that cleans my dishes, feel each dish as I put it in, enjoy their beautiful patterns and colors? Would I taste the food on my plate, take joy in its preparation, and not just rush through another meal?

Would I savor the moment?

As the holidays approach...I want to be fully present as I buy each gift, relishing the person I got it for. I want to wrap each package, fill each basket, and appreciate the moment. I want to be more grateful to God that these wonderful folks are in my life.

As I wrap up the quarter at school and spend hours reading journals, grading papers and evaluating final projects... I want to STOP and give thanks that I have had time with these amazing students. I don't want to let the workload spoil my attitude.

I want to be intentional about experiencing the JOY in my life!

So this morning, as I sit by the fire and sip my coffee, I have a smile on my face. A new day is dawning. I am grateful to be alive so I can enjoy every second of it! I hope you enjoy your day too!

God Bless!

Love Linda

I'M SO EXCITED, I JUST CAN'T HIDE IT!!!

2010-11-07T07:48:00.000-08:00

Years ago, and I do mean Y.E.A.R.S ago, the Pointer Sisters sang the lyrics "I'm so excited, I just can't hide it. I'm about to lose control and I think I like it!" Now granted the object of their excitement was a man, but still these lyrics perfectly summarize how I feel today!

What am I sooooooo excited about you may be asking yourself? Here are just a few of the things that are putting a smile on my face right now....

Drum roll please.....

1) It's BABY time at the Thompson house!!!

Jessi, Roger and Emma are having a baby next May! Well, technically Jessi and Roger are having the baby, but if you know Emma you know that she is all geared up to be a BIG SISTER!

This baby is a miracle, a blessing, and a joy for them and our extended family. I have love, love, loved being in on this glorious moment, praying for this pea- in- the- pod and celebrating this new life and member of our family! More on this later...:) Please keep this family in your prayers during this pregnancy.

2) It's ADOPTION time at the Farrell house!!

That's right, you heard it here first! OK... maybe not first, but this is a miracle too. Was it on the radar screen for the Farrell family to adopt a wonderful girl from Ethiopia? Nope. Did God put it in Amy and Ryan's hearts! Yup! Is this a story that warms your heart and renews your faith ? It is! Where the heck is Ethiopia and what is that culture like? We are all finding that out and we can't stop smiling and praising! More on this later...:) Please keep this family in your prayers as they go through the extensive adoption process.

So, in short, (and you all know there is no "short" with me)... my heart is overflowing with God's grace and love for us. Two more grandbabies...how good does it get??

Add the upcoming holidays to this equation...and I am OVER THE MOON WITH EXCITEMENT AND JOY!!!... and I just can't hide it!

God Bless!

Love Linda

"Dear God. This is Linda. I need a miracle."

2010-10-22T03:39:00.000-07:00

I remember this time last year as if it was yesterday. Halloween was approaching, and my heart was as sad as it had ever been. My life seemed in disrepair, tattered, disassembled and I was asking God:

"Why?"

"What do I do now?"

"How will we all get through this heartache and pain?"

I was so sad that I couldn't hear the answers.

Everywhere... relationships that mattered to me seemed to be in chaos.

My heart felt like it was shattered.

I tried to hold on to the old adage that things could only get better. Perhaps we would, with God's grace, get through this awful passage.

I wasn't sure we would. It was the dark night of the soul.

One vivid night, when I had cried more than I thought possible, I asked God for a miracle.

I told Him that I was powerless to change everything and that only He could bring us through this heartache on every front. I remembered the old quotation,

"Don't tell God how big the storm is, tell the storm how big God is.

On my knees and broken...

I told the storm that the God I loved and had committed my life to at age 16, was bigger than anything it could throw at me or my loved ones.

I told the storm that I didn't know how God would make things right, but with all of the faith I could muster, I was going to trust that MY God could do miracles.

I remembered another quotation:

"There are only two ways to live your life- one is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle."

I was going to believe that everything was a miracle and that what was happening would get turned around. I was going to believe, with every cell in my body, that God could make things right on every front....heal every heart, give every relationship a new beginning.

Was it possible that God could do exceedingly, abundantly above all things I could ever imagine?

Was it possible that God could turn this pain around and bring new hope and healing?

I chose to believe He could, even though I couldn't imagine how.

All of my cards were on the table. I was helpless. I gave it ALL to Him.

It is now one year later.

Another Halloween is upon me.

I am teary as I write this post. It is not my place to tell all of the stories, but it is my place this morning to praise God for answering the prayers of this grateful woman.

*I could NEVER, EVER, in a thousand lifetimes have imagined the great work God would do in the past twelve months.

*I could NEVER, EVER have imagined where we all are now.

*I could NEVER, EVER have imagined the healing and changes that are happening every day.

*I could NEVER, EVER have imagined that my heart would be lighter and my faith would be stronger.

*I could NEVER, EVER have imagined that God's grace would be the start of miracle after miracle...and they just keep coming.

So this morning, as I drink my coffee with tears streaming down my face, I remember when I whispered the prayer, "Dear God. This is Linda. I need a miracle."

And I am grateful beyond words because He answered that prayer!

God Bless! Love Linda

LIFE LESSON #626: When You Fall Down, Be Gracious, and Get Back Up Again!

2010-10-08T04:18:00.001-07:00

I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE to learn "Life Lessons" from my grandchildren. One of my most recent lessons came from my grandson, Jacob. Jacob loves to run and last year improved in each cross country race he was in. He ended up going to the All-City cross country meet. While Jacob wasn't the fastest runner last year, he went to all the practices, worked hard, and made steady improvement. Bert and I went to his races and were so proud of his efforts and sportsmanship.

This year, when cross country season started, once again Jacob went to all of the practices and worked hard. At his first meet of the season, he came in 12th. He did that with a terrible side-ache. Yet to get to All-City, you have to be in the top ten. So he was excited and nervous about his second meet.

At the second race, the Balboa runners got to be in the inside lane. I saw Jacob ahead of time, and he was smiling, relaxed, and encouraging his pal Caleb. As the race was about to begin, Bert and I were on the far side of the track. We heard the gun go off, the yelling and screaming followed, and we saw the runners come around to where we were. Caleb was in front. He is one gifted runner. Other runners went by, but no Jacob. The week before he had been toward the start of the pack. Finally we saw him, diligently running, but at that point way behind. We wondered what had happened. He finished the race, gave a great effort at the end, and knew he wouldn't be going to All City this year.

Later, after we got to his home, we heard that a boy had fallen down at the first turn and Jacob had tripped on him and fallen as well. He knew he could quit. He chose not to. He knew he probably wouldn't make All-City this year since he was way behind. But as he told me,

"Nana, sometimes you just have to run the best race you can, even though it doesn't turn out the way you wanted. I just did the best I could."

Jacob hadn't made excuses at the end of the race. He wasn't all angry and upset that he didn't make his goal. He wasn't furious at he boy who had tripped and fallen. He just did what he could, even though the circumstances were hard.

Ah...a "Life Lesson" out of the mouths of babes. When you fall down, just get back up again and do the best you can...and be gracious in the process. :)

I have had some not so easy "falling down moments" in the last several years. Sometimes I have been so disappointed in how
things have turned out, how I behaved or how other people have behaved, that my internal serenity and peace has been disrupted. I didn't feel one bit gracious in how I handled the disappointments.

More truthfully, I have allowed those circumstances to unhinge me. When I look back, I have wasted time, effort, and energy in the should-a could-as. I have, at times, held on to those hurts and regrets. I have, at times, been haunted by them. I have replayed and replayed what I said and did and what they said and did. I had a hard time letting go of what felt like a personal failure.

When I grow up...I want to be more like Jacob. I want to not beat myself up when I have done the best I could do. I want to
let God's peace and spirit fill me up so I can let go of old hurts. I want to be washed clean from irritations and resentments.
When I fall down, I want to be gracious as I get back up again. I want to be satisfied that I did the best I could...even if the outcome isn't what I wanted.

As Bert and I were ready to leave the track we turned and saw Jacob with his best buddy Caleb. Caleb had won the race. Jacob had his arm on Caleb's shoulder and grinned at his best friend. He was truly happy for how well Caleb had done and was able to put his own race behind him. He was disappointed, but happy for his friend who had done so well.

Thanks Jacob, for once again teaching your Nana some important "Life Lessons!" Love you buddy and I am SO, SO proud of the wonderful young man you are becoming!

God Bless!
Love Linda

Discovering A Treasure...My Parents' Love Letters

2010-09-27T20:35:00.001-07:00

Children have a limited view of their parents' relationship with one another. After all, Mom and Dad are seen through a child's filter and perspective. My relationship with my Mom and Dad was no different. They were married for more than 50 years, both came from complicated childhoods, and at times seemed at once loving and also in desperate conflict with each other. They danced in the minefields of life... together. They navigated the depression and lived through an unthinkable separation during WWII.

Recently, in doing a deep clean of our basement and sifting through old, old boxes...I found an unexpected treasure. A new glimpse, if you will, of who Dolores and Mark were to one another. I found their old love letters and the cards they wrote to one another on birthdays and anniversaries.

I almost felt like I was intruding to read them..yet I had to know an age old question. Did they really love each other deeply?
Was that the foundation that held them together in spite of all the fighting and Dad's drinking. Did love keep them together as they tried to navigate life, even in times that seemed like all out war?

As an only child I watched them. I learned. I knew what set my Dad off, and I also knew that my Mom needed a protector. I was the one caught in the middle. But I also saw glimpses... Moments when there was so much kindness.

Who were they... really?

The letters are short and filled with such admiration and sincerity. I can almost hear their voices as I read the words through my tears. And then when I saw this clip on You Tube, I was once again reminded that all relationships from time to time are tested. It feels like a marriage may not make it. But years later, those battle wounds and scars make it stronger. I love in this clip how couples show their wedding pictures and then dance together...holding one another tenderly.

My Dad died first. My Mom never truly recovered from losing him. Neither did I. All the irritations and old issues subsided with his passing. The missing never ended. We forgave him.

And then she, too, was gone. My heart broke in a way that only God's grace could help put it back together. I miss her every day.

The letters tell the story. She did love him. She signed them.."Love always, your Dolores" He did love her..."You were the best thing that ever happened to me."

When I was little I used to see them dance together in our living room. Now I love to imagine them both, dancing together in Heaven.

Love and blessings!
Linda

I Forgot... Again!

2010-09-26T07:49:00.000-07:00

The first week of school has come and gone. WOW! That's all I can say.

I am thrilled to be back in the classroom. I am honored to be working with students who are dedicated to improving their lives. That part of the week warmed my heart and made me realize why I LOVE teaching. I loved seeing my friends and colleagues. And once again, it is inspiring to team-teach with Amy.

However, if I'm honest (and I am trying to be truly honest with myself and others), the outside-of-the-classroom climate at the college was CRAZY...and I do mean like the TV show "Saturday Night Live" crazy. One unthinkable event after another. These weren't small events mind you. Any one of the events was detrimental to SCC as I know it. We needed Betty White to show up, just like she did on Saturday Night Live, and give us some comic relief!

Yes, the week was stressful outside my classroom. The details of that stress really don't matter. What matters is that...

I forgot, again, to take a breath and rely on God.

Yikes! And the physical and emotional consequences of that "forgetting" were noticeable.

This morning I re-read an encouragement email Amy forwarded to me this last week. Granted, I did read it before but I was so sucked into the "vortex" of the week, and holding on to my sense of well being, that the message didn't sink in... until now.

The email described a Mom in a kitchen preparing a meal with a sleeping baby leaning into her. The Mom clattered and clanked as she whirled around to make dinner, with the baby nestling into her hip. The outer world of activity and whirlwind didn't phase the baby because she leaned into her Mommy.

And the message suggested that I need to lean into God just as that baby leaned into her Mom.

Ah....THERE'S the truth of it: When I just rely on me, I take in all of the stressors I can't change. When I lean into God, I'll find peace and serenity in the midst of the whirlwind.

I have learned this lesson before, but why oh why is it so easy to forget it.

I guess I'm a slow learner when it comes to turning everything over to the Lord.

My "I can fix it if I just try harder" mentality kicks in and the vicious cycle begins.

It's almost a predictable mathematical equation:

Want stress to sink in...rely on just me.

Want peace and serenity in the midst of chaos...lean into God.

I am breathing easier as I take in this message. I remember that God is in control and can fix all things.

This morning I am grateful for the reminder!

God Bless!

Love Linda

CONTENTMENT, NESTING and Teaching an Old Dog "New Tricks"

2010-09-21T03:25:00.000-07:00

Simply put, this summer changed me. I have, for years, longed for a more balanced life, but I felt helpless to make the core changes to facilitate that change. I just got used to rush, rush, rush...work, work, work.

True, I was (and still am) incredibly productive. At almost 64 years of age, I joked that I could work circles around many of my younger colleagues. I came from a family background where hard work was in our bone marrow, and I was following that coveted tradition.

The thought of being a "slacker" was repulsive to me. Still is.

Yet, where was contentment?

It somehow got lost in all of the hard work.

What is contentment to me? It's loving being where I am at any moment and finding the joy, serenity, and peace in the little things in life. It's creating moments where the whirlwind stops so I can be centered , creative, and faithful to the God I love and the people I cherish.

It's taking time to relish making and drinking a cup of coffee. It's appreciating the joy of cleaning my counters instead of being irritated that they aren't clean. It's finding old black and white photos of my loved ones and starting to frame them and create a family wall. It is personalizing a home we have been in for a long time and creating a living environment that reflects my heart and soul.

It's "nesting", not decorating.

What's the difference? For me, decorating is an exterior process of quickly getting a room in shape with a new look and update. It may mean a new coat of paint, new slip covers, or a trip to a store that refreshes and revives a tired, old living space. Don't get me wrong. I love decorating.

But "nesting" is just a little different. It's not just an external process. It's an internal change of heart. It is reflecting who I am into where I live. It is finding cherished items that reflect precious memories and surrounding ourselves with them. It is "authentic living" that enhances our spirits and our souls. It is a deeply felt reminder that I am not all that I have, but I am God's child. It is the beginning of the process of internal examination into who God means me to be.

It is the next step of going deeper as I get older.

For me, authentic living is peeling back the superficial layers in every area of my life. It is relishing the time I have left on this earth and REALLY making the best of it.

And it all started with the basement...with getting rid of "stuff" and changing a space I couldn't stand into a peaceful and esthetic place I love to be in. That basement is a "work in progress" and so am I.

So as fall starts to change the leaves in the trees and splashes new colors of orange, green, amber, red and yellow in our garden, I am puttering in our home...to my heart's content.

I am getting more rest for my body and rest for my soul. I am finding my old art supplies and beginning, in my mind, to imagine drawing this year's Christmas card. I am going through boxes of old photos and revisiting those memories. I am smiling more and worrying less. I am placing my hand in God's more often and letting Him guide my day. I am crying more at the suffering I am seeing and feeling because my heart isn't wound quite so tight.

Yesterday I was back at school hugging old students who had returned and appreciating colleagues who have done this sacred work for years and years. I felt honored to meet new students and wanted to give them a safe home at school where they could let down their overwhelm and stress. And then I came home, left school behind and took a nap. That's right a nap.

I woke up, felt rested and happy, and made a delicious salmon dinner for my hubby.

I felt "content", happy through and through. I felt alive!

I guess you CAN teach an "old dog new tricks"!

Sending love, contentment, and blessings your way!

God Bless!

Linda

"AND TO EVERYTHING THERE IS A SEASON"...

2010-09-08T06:12:00.000-07:00

I am in awe of God's handiwork. In His perfect timing the air starts to cool, mornings are crisp, colors start to change, and fall is once again in the air. As a new season approaches, and the best summer ever draws to a close, I find that I am at once grateful beyond words, mixed with a teaspoon of sadness, at the end of this SPECTACULAR summer.

Lately I have heard myself say that "This was the best summer of my life!"

Strong words, even for me.

What made this summer so memorable? It wasn't fancy trips to exotic locations. It wasn't buying something or DOING something. It was relaxing into my life so that I could have precious time with those I dearly love.

I know, most people don't associate ME with the word RELAXING :) Truth be told, I didn't either..until this summer.

What did relaxing look like this summer? Here are a few examples:

* I relished my first cup of coffee in the morning and had long and drawn out conversations with my beloved hubby as we sat on the sofa sipping and sharing. No gulping and running... just being.

* I slept in, often until 6 or 7 am. To the average person this might not seem like a big deal. However, I am normally up at 3am every morning during the school year. This summer I worked on changing that life-long habit. I got rest. I was intentional. When I woke up at 3, I told myself (the way you would a small child) that all of the birds are still sleeping and it's not time to get up yet! :)

* I laughed and chuckled until it hurt. I giggled and took delight in playing in a sprinkler in my work clothes (with Emma) or just looking with loving and playful eyes at Jenna's "crazy hair" when she woke up. My time at Cannon Beach with my dear friend Sharon was hilarious. We laughed until it hurt!:)

* I puttered and cleaned my home. I nested and completed some projects that might seem small to most people, but they were HUGE to me!

* I wrote in times on my calendar for "self-care"...that's right, self-care, not work. And what's more I committed that time to caring for me with as much diligence as I would an important consulting appointment.

*I had wonderful and important "Nana Time" talks with my darling grandchildren. Not the kind of talks about just activities, but the "Updated Postcard" kind of talks about what is going on in their hearts. I adore my grand babies, all of them, and I am passionate about knowing what makes them "tick"!

* I took time to breathe, take naps, read great books ("Fly Away Home" was my absolute favorite) and have my quiet time with God. Like the old spiritual says, "It is well with my soul."

I focused on "soul-time" and time with the Lord this summer.

* I kept up my "Gratitude Journal"... a reminder of my multitude of blessings. I focused on what I could control and asked God to help release me from worrying about what I can't control.

* I got tickets to take Bert to the musical "South Pacific", Nutcracker Ballet tickets for Jessi, Emma, and me for our annual Christmas tradition, and await the Women of Faith Conference and Beth Moore Christian Conference with Amy. I love, LOVE, LOVE having events on my calendar to look forward to.

* The list of summer delights goes on and on....life-changing moments as my pace of life shifted from "turbo speed" to a "slow down and enjoy it all" speed.

I am grateful for this relaxed time and as school is about to start I want to take these life-changing lessons with me. To everything there is a season...and I am "blessed beyond measure"

by this one!

God Bless!

Love Linda

LIVING FAITH as if Jesus was a "Drive-Through" God

2010-08-25T05:51:00.000-07:00

Relationships fascinate me. They always have, and they always will. I stand back and realize how easy it is to take relationships for granted, misuse them (if only unintentionally), and think everything is "fine", when in fact it is not.

Relationships are a joy, the fabric of my life, and what makes me get up every morning and think, "Well, today will be interesting and never boring." :)

I am a student of relationships, my own and others. I look at relationships at home and at work trying to understand how I need to make relationships better. I am always on the look out for what it takes to make a relationship healthy, growing, and meaningful. What kind of open heart and communication is called for? What kind of time commitment makes a difference? While I may miss the mark, I am always trying to improve the relationships that matter to me.

One question that has surfaced a lot this summer is...

Does this person I truly care about REALLY know that their relationship with me is a high priority in my life? Does Bert know? Does Amy know? Does Jessi know? Do my grandchildren know? Do other family members know? Do my friends know?

How about my relationship with God? Does God know?

In a recent sermon at our church our Pastor challenged us to look at our relationship with God, with Jesus, and see how our behavior met the qualities of a healthy relationship here on earth.

He asked:

Do you regularly talk to God and thank Him for all of the blessings He has given you?

...Or do you only come to God when you want something and you want it "soon please".

Or maybe we often even leave off the please.

Do you talk to God every day or only in a crisis?

..."Please God, (even though I haven't talked to you for five years or even really had a relationship with you)..."please save my child (my job, my marriage, my life)."

Our pastor asked us to consider what would happen to our earthly relationships if we treated them like we often treat God. Yikes!

Pastor Lonnie then gave, what was for me, the ultimate analogy.

"Do you see Jesus as a drive-through God?"

You drive up, give your order of what you want, and expect Jesus to be at the window fulfilling what you want, when you want it, and how your want it. Your "prayers" consist of telling God HOW to do His job and WHEN to do it.

"I'll have ketchup and mustard, but no onions please, Jesus."

"I'd like a better job, better marriage, and all my ducks in a row...and could I please have that NOW. Oh, and by the way, thanks for the great day and all my blessings. Sorry I haven't been to church, worshiped you, or read your Word in the Bible."

Our Pastor then asked, "Are you living your faith as if Jesus was a drive-through?"

I could barely breathe at this point in the sermon.

Oops! I hesitated to look around to see if Lonnie Mitchell was talking to everyone or just me.

Am I really that arrogant with God? If I asked God for the highs and lows in our relationship what would He say? Would He feel like a real priority in my life or just a side dish ordered at Taco Bell?

I felt my knees go weak.

How does He feel when I tell Him what to do, how to do it, and when it needs to be done?

More importantly...Am I really talking to the creator of the universe, the Almighty God, the Alpha and Omega, the Giver of all life and blessings as if He was an employee at a drive-through restaurant?

I felt like I was going to throw up.

This summer, following this sermon, I have been re-reminded that my prayer life needs some revision, my time in the Bible needs some revision, my attitude about going to church and fellowship with other Christians needs some revision, and my overall relationship with God needs some time, love, energy, communication and revision.

I do NOT want to live my faith as if Jesus was a "Drive Through."

Your thoughts?

God Bless!

Love, Linda

The Double Standard of the "HONEY-DO" List

2010-08-02T13:55:00.000-07:00

I love teaching. One of the MANY reasons I love teaching adult students is how much I learn from them. One of those "AHA!" moments came in my Gender Communication class this last quarter.

We were having a "fishbowl" exercise where a group of women became part of an inner circle for discussion. As part of that group, we sat on the floor in the center of the room while other students sat around us listening and taking notes. The goal of the women's discussion was to offer "tips" to the men in the class about communication, attitude, and behaviors that might improve their relationships with important women in their lives.

We also had a "fishbowl" where the men got to talk and the women listened and took notes. The men's fishbowl went first. To be fair, the men displayed much better manners as listeners in the fishbowl exercises. They not only listened respectfully, they asked amazing and thought-provoking questions.

In the women's fishbowl one gal talked about how everything is better when men really help at home. She inferred, and we might have an "Amen, Sister!" from any women reading this blog, that men don't really do their fair share at home. Women work at outside jobs, just like their husbands, but they are then expected to do the majority of kid care and household care. All the women in the group agreed that men helping more with the household chores and children would make women in general a much happier group of people.

After the fishbowl was over, and the men could ask questions, one well-respected and older male student asked if he might participate in the conversation. This was someone who dearly loves his wife and had been sharing all of his class information on improving gender communication with her. Everyone in the room really liked him.

Quite simply, and sincerely, John asked,"I've always wondered about the double standard of the "honey-do" list. Could you ladies help me with my confusion?" He went on to explain that he always helped his wife around the house. He felt that was part of being a good husband. Yet he also had his own list of things to accomplish. While his list might not be written down, he had one.

What puzzled him, he said respectfully, was why women always seemed to feel that they could give a guy another list of their priorities to do, the ever famous "Honey-Do List!" and expected men to re-prioritize and get the new list done ASAP. What, he asked, would happen if men started to give women those kinds of lists?

He went on to ask how many of us gave our husbands a "Honey-Do List!" We all raised our hands. He then asked how many of our husbands gave us regular "Honey-Do Lists"? No hands went up. "Is that a double standard?", he asked.

Our mouths dropped open.

We were speechless.

It had never occurred to me that the famous "Honey-Do list" was one-sided and a double standard. The "Honey-Do List" was a cultural phenomenon, passed from generation of women to the next generation of women. It was a cry for help from busy women, desperate to have their spouses help them out at home. But was it a double standard? Would I be shocked to have Bert write a "Honey-Do List" for me? Food for thought!

Yup, I love teaching!

I love learning new things!

Thanks John!

What do YOU think about the famous "Honey Do Lists"??? Is it a double standard?

God Bless!

Love Linda

She Is One Tough Cookie and A Warrior Against Cancer!

2010-07-20T11:05:00.000-07:00

In this culture the word "hero" gets tossed around rather loosely at times. Or at least that's my opinion. A celebrity is designated to be a "hero" because they donate to a cause. An athlete is a "hero" because they do something extraordinary. Now please don't think I am diminishing those accomplishments. I'm not.

But to me a true hero is someone whose selflessness and courage are such a bright shining star for others that you are almost blinded by their faith, perseverance and tenacity... and they do this day-after-day, week-after-week, month-after-month, and year-after-year...against

great odds. Their attitude, in the face of extreme adversity, makes you sit up and say, "So that's what real character looks like!" When faced with all the tough things life can throw at you, they hold on to God with both hands and show you what faith really looks like.

Eileen Thompson is this kind of hero to me.

I've known Eileen for many years, and I have seen her battle cancer twice. Once, fourteen years ago...and now, unexpectedly, fourteen years later. What is so amazing and heroic about Eileen is how she handles all of the tough things in life. She turns to Jesus and holds on to Him. She handles the most difficult adversity with grace, or as she says,... "I am still here by the grace of God. I can do this by God's grace." And I believe her!

*Bring on the chemo-she handles it with grace.

*Lose your hair- she handles it with grace.

*Legs swell up so your ankles don't bend- she handles it with grace.

*Because of the cancer drugs you no longer have feeling in your hand-she handles it with grace.

*Have an open wound after cancer surgery-she handles it with grace.

*Raise your granddaughter in the midst of it all- she handles it with love and grace.

I'm not always sure how God works, or what makes Him smile, but I can't help but imagine that when Jesus sees how Eileen perseveres and follows Him, He must smile.

Eileen would never call herself a hero. She might even be embarrassed that I wrote this about her. That humbleness is partly what makes her accomplishments so extraordinary to me.

She is one tough cookie, and I am proud to call this cancer warrior my friend and soul sister!

God Bless!

Love Linda

PS. Check the song in the previous post... "Let The Waters Rise!" It reminds me of Eileen!

To my soul sis, Eileen- this song reminds me of you! Love Linda

2010-07-19T12:38:00.000-07:00

Thoughts As I Head To Cannon Beach!

2010-06-25T03:54:00.000-07:00

OK...this is even hard for me to believe! I changed the template on my blog all by myself. :)

A good sign as I head off for a week of respite, fun, nourishment, and time with a dear friend.

This week has been beyond chaotic, and I have been challenged to again and again turn EVERYTHING over to God! And while there have been challenges, my heart is FULL of gratitude for all of the blessings that are overflowing. It's all about how you frame it! Here are a few of this week's events in no particular order.

Yesterday was a magical marker kind of day. Thirty three years ago, on June 24th, Jessi was born. Talk about nostalgia...it seems like yesterday. So many memories flooded in yesterday about her birth and the deep sense of wonder about carrying a life and seeing her born. What a gift it is, an honor, to be part of helping to grow someone. Jessi from day one has always been a "go-getter", a take-it-on kind of gal. Back then she rode her big wheel in the dirt with her party dress on. Today she is a triathlete and still ridin' in style. As I've watched her become a wife, mom, daughter, sister, friend, teacher, athlete...and more...I have been amazed at God's gift to me and to those around her. I love you Jess Jess! I always have and I always will! Happy 33rd birthday sweetie! I can't wait to celebrate with you when I am back!

Not only was this week marked by Jessi's birthday, the unexpected event of Jacob's emergency appendix removal left us all shaken. One minute Jacob is running around and having a great day, and the next day he is in lots of pain and having trouble walking. That evening we are all gathered at Children's Hospital at Sacred Heart in the waiting room... waiting for a surgeon to let us know Jacob is OK. My heart was in my throat. Between tears I just keep praying..."Please God, let him be good as new". And God kept that promise. While Jacob is still in the hospital recovering, he WILL make a full recovery. What a great relief! I love you Jacob and I am so, so glad that you are getting better!

Besides Jessi's birthday and Jacob's surgery, a major event this week was SCC's graduation on Monday and getting my grades in. I also came back on Tuesday and Wednesday to start to get ready for next year. What a great year of teaching at SCC and how amazing and blessed I feel to get to teach with Amy! Her presence at SCC has been a gift to her students and also a gift to me! I love watching her teach! Thanks for a great year Aim! I can't wait to do it all again next year! It has also been a gift to my heart to see the kind of Mama she is as she has ministered to Jacob during this time.

And not to be left out, two of the unsung heroes of this week have been Ryan and Bert. Ryan, I have loved watching you minister to your family as you have given and given and put them first.

Not only did you finish a clean up at your old house so the new buyers could move in early, and you did it at 3:30 in the morning after Jacob's surgery, you have shown love and leadership at every turn. I am so grateful that you were there to remind us that God was taking care of it all! Love you!

And to my dear Boppa...who also helped to hold down the fort...I am so grateful for you every day! Your deep love for us shines through all the time, but especially in moments when things seem scary. You are my rock! Love you so much!

What a week! And now it's time to move my clothes for the trip from the washer to the dryer.

It's time to breathe and get revitalized. It's time to hear the ocean, read books, laugh myself silly...and just have fun!

Life is good, and I am grateful! Loves and hugs as I head off.

God Bless!

Love Linda

Time For A Change!

2010-06-11T04:18:00.000-07:00

I can feel it in the air. I can feel it in my bones. I can feel it in my emerging smile. I am wistfully waiting for school to end. Closing the book on another year of teaching. What an intense year it has been...but that is for another post.

What I'm struck by this morning is my desire to extend my cuppa, cuppa coffee time, plant some new and less drenched plants in my planters, get the house super clean and organized , do all the laundry, clean my car and get on with the simple pleasures in my life that take care of me.

I need to catch up with some special folks and have quality time, time that is measured in luxurious hours, not clock-watching minutes.

But most of all... I need to catch up with me!

I.need.some.order.

I.need.a.change.in.focus.

I am grateful for an extended break where I am able to re-find myself...and not the one who grades papers, chairs committees, and does marketing for my department at SCC. That super-productive, always-in-top-gear girl needs to be put on the back burner until late next September.

Where oh where did the whimsical, artistic, book reading part of me fly off to? I'm not sure, but I know I'll find her!

The sun may come out

Or it may choose not to

It doesn't matter.

Rain or shine, I feel a smile coming on!

It's time for a change.

God Bless!

Love Linda

GOD IS GOOD!...even when life isn't..the story of Zac Smith

2010-06-03T04:24:00.000-07:00

Please view this:

The Story of Zac Smith from NewSpring Media on Vimeo.

It's a simple equation, almost a mathematical certainty. Life has ups and downs. There are times when life putts along and all seems fine. And there are times when, in a moment's notice, life turns on a dime.

And.everything.changes.

I'm not sure if I am more aware of this phenomenon as I age, or if it has always been this way and I just didn't notice.

But I am noticing now.

More and more I see how precious life is. More and more I see how precious my marriage is. More and more I see how precious my grandchildren are, my adult children are, their spouses are, my students are, my friends are, my co-workers are. The list goes on and on.

There's a song in church that has a chorus:
"You give and take away
You give and take away
And still my heart will say
Lord, blessed be your name."

On most days, I know, without a shadow of a doubt, that God loves me, has my back, and is in charge. I know, deep in my soul, that having a daily walk with God, praising His glory, and not just "talking" about God when it is convenient...is at the core of all that I am.

I truly believe that for many of us (me included) when crisis hits, a child is diagnosed with cancer or a marriage falls apart, the prayers flow. "Oh God", we find ourselves praying,"please don't let this happen." Until that moment we (I) have had God on the back burner. Now, we need something, so we turn to God.

I have to wonder how that must feel to God. He's a God of convenience for so many of us.

Every day I turn to God, talk to God, walk with God...but is God at the heart of all that I am and do...not so, sadly.

This has been a season in my life that is marked by enormous changes. Lost friends. Surgeries for loved ones. My own unexpected eye surgery this week. Changes in relationships. Disappointments. Victories. Confusion.

And then I stumble on to the story of Zac Smith. Stumble is the wrong word. It wasn't an accident or coincidence. God led me there. It's not an easy video for me to see. But it's a reminder. An important reminder. God is good, even when life isn't. Even when it doesn't turn out the way I want it to, or my prayers seem unanswered, God's plan is greater than my own.

Zac Smith died last Sunday. But I am so grateful that his faith touched me this morning and reminded me that no matter what...God is good!

God Bless! Love Linda

THE LEGACY OF AN AMAZING MOTHER!

2010-05-09T05:17:00.000-07:00

Today is Mother's Day and like so many Mother's Days in the past few years, I woke up really teary. At once I feel so blessed that I can hardly breathe, and at the same time I feel so sad that my tears don't seem to stop flowing. The phrase, "You don't know what you had until it's gone"

resonates through my mind. It's Mother's Day, and my Mom isn't here to celebrate it with her.

Let me talk about "feeling blessed" first. Dolores McColm was an AMAZING Mom to me. Everything I know about being a good Mom I learned from her. I have endless stories...truly endless stories...of how she was constantly there for me. In a collage of my life, she is the glue that held everything together. I never once felt that she didn't love me. Not once.

That "so sad my tears don't stop flowing" part has to do with her death and the gut-wretching, profound loss that it has been in my life. I miss everything about her, even the things that used to irritate me. I miss her phone calls, her advice, her wise counsel, her news clippings she sent me. I miss someone having my back as only my Mom did. I miss talking to her about the girls.

I miss her cooking and how pretty she looked when she was dressed up. I miss the chance to tell her that I love her.

The last few years of my Mom's life she was really ill. She was dying from smoking and on oxygen 100% of the time. She wouldn't move to Spokane, so every other weekend for two and a half years I went to Seattle to have time with her and coordinate her health care. The roles were reversed. Finally, I had a chance to give back. Some people talked about how that must have been such a huge sacrifice on my part. All I could say was that I could NEVER, EVER repay her for all she had done for me. NEVER. EVER.

My Mom wasn't perfect. No Mom is. It's easy to see Moms as too bossy or too involved. Why is she always so pushy or trying to tell you what to do? It's easy to see what's wrong about your Mom and forget the sacrifices she made to get you where you are. It's easy to forget all the driving she did to get you to activities and all the thousands of meals she made that you ate without thinking. It's easy to see her imperfections and forget the nights she was up checking your temperature when you were ill or held you while you cried because some boy broke your heart.

You can only begin to get her sacrifices and deep and abiding love...once you become a Mom yourself. And then we are often so busy we aren't really all that grateful for the legacy our Moms left us.

But if you were or are blessed to have a "good enough Mom", there's one thing I know for sure.

You will get what she did, and who she really is to you, once she is gone. You will miss her with every cell in your body and like me this morning, you would give anything to call her and wish her a "Happy Mother's Day!"

So here's to you Mom! I will love you forever, I will like you for always and as long as I'm living your baby I'll be! (from the book "I'll love you forever")

God Bless!

Love Linda

Life Takes An Unexpected Twist and Turn...telling the whole truth and nothing but the truth!!

2010-04-18T05:52:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I was at the funeral of a very dear friend of ours, John Brennan. John has been a dear friend of Bert's for over twenty years. They were in a men's running group together, had lunch together and shared their lives at a deep level on a regular basis.

Simply put, we are all astounded that John is gone. How can that be? He had a backache and side ache, felt like he had the flu, ended up in a coma, had an operation and they found him full of cancer, and poof...one month later he is gone.

John's memorial yesterday was truly unique. The Unitarian Church was packed, a sea of people from my "old life" with Tim and my early life with Bert...Jim and Sue Shaw, Kent Hoffman, Deanna and Don Roberts, Gail and John Goeller...the list goes on and on.

There were so many stories told about John and the most amazing service filled with bands, slideshows, a potluck, so many friends gathered. John would have loved this party. But he wouldn't have expected so many people to come.

I learned alot about our friend John yesterday. As Jim Laudermilk and Kent Hoffman said, John had asked them to tell the truth about his life, celebrate all he was and wasn't, to share his struggles. One of those struggles hit everyone hard.

While John loved other people deeply, he wasn't really so sure that people really loved him back. Maybe we are all a little like this.

As we told stories about John, and many of us did in front of that packed crowd, one story stood out that Steve Heeps told. He had stopped to see John at the hospital and told him that his friends missed him. John rolled his eyes and said, "Yeah sure, all two of them." While John was often sarcastic, Steve said he knew at that moment that John didn't "get" how much he mattered.

That's been a theme of life lately. How is it, I have to ask myself, that we are all so HUNGRY to matter to someone and so often feel that person's absolute indifference. We long to love and be loved in return, but we are rebuffed and turned away. In my opinion, it's usually not because of who we are, but because of the hole in that person's heart. But it hurts deeply, at the core of our being, to love someone who doesn't love us back.

As I have gotten older, I am no longer afraid to tell people who I am or to tell them that they matter to me. I told many folks at that service yesterday that I loved them.

Likewise, I have much better boundaries with those who don't truly care about me or those who can barely tolerate me. Life is much too short to waste more time trying to get someone to care. I value my life and time. I am blessed to be alive and loving the life God gave me. And that's a bit of the story I told in front of that crowd yesterday.

I walked up to that podium knowing that the story I was about to tell might shock some of the people in that room. One of the "family secrets", so to speak. But God knows it all anyway, my family knows the story, my students know the story, and I wanted Rachael, Michael, and Sarah, John's kids, to hear my story.

I started by saying that there had been so many warm and funny stories about John that were being told at the podium, and while I had many of those as well, I wanted to share about a difficult conversation John and I had, years ago. I told Rachael, Michael and Sarah that this story was for them and I looked only at them as I told the story

I told them that I was one of the people whose life was saved by their dad.

I talked about the time in my life when I was first married to Bert, yet where I was in so much pain and anger from my divorce from Tim that I began to drink heavily. My Dad was an alcoholic, but I had never been much of a drinker before that so I didn't imagine I could be.

One day, in one of those amazing twist and turns that life brings you, I heard a knock on my door and it was John Brennan. I assumed he was there to see Bert, who wasn't there. John shared that in fact he had come to see me.

He had watched my decline, hurt, and choices to dull the pain. John knew that I was a mess, and he told me so. While I had heard the same message from Bert, suddenly I listened with new ears. John said there was help out there for me if I would stop drinking and take it.

He then asked me a question that changed my life. He asked me what Jessi and Amy would think of me ten years from now if I kept this up?

My whole life changed in that moment. I am now 22 years clean and sober because a friend told me the hard truth about who I really was, not who I pretended to be. And as I looked at Rachael, Michael and Sarah, as I told this story yesterday in that huge service in front of all those people, my whole life changed again.

I told them that Bert thanked their Dad for saving my life, Jessi and Amy thanked their Dad for giving them a sober Mom, even my ex-husband Tim thanked their Dad, my twelve grandchildren thanked their Dad, and the thousands upon thousands of students I have had at SCC thanked their Dad for having a teacher who was sober and could really love them.

As I stepped down from that podium, in front of that packed crowd, I had told the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth. I didn't cover things up, or keep the secret to make me look good. The pretenses were dropped. I had prayed before I spoke and felt God's "Go for it kid! It's time!"

Someone once said,,"The truth will set you free!" John's telling me the truth saved my life. My telling my truth yesterday, with no shame and only feeling grateful, set me free.

God Bless!

Love Linda

Gratitude and Blessings!

2010-04-01T06:38:00.000-07:00

Ahhhhhhh! I LOVE spring break! Truth be told, I love any break from teaching. I work so, so hard, put in countless hours, literally burn the midnight oil, grade what feels like (and might actually be) a thousand papers, get my grades in, prepare for the next quarter...and then I get to "pause and regroup."

It's one of the many things I LOVE about being a teacher.

That "pause and regroup" comes with a huge sense of relief. Suddenly, I can take a moment to have an extra cup of coffee, kiss my darling hubby longer and hold him tighter, smile more often, and make time for the little things it is easy to take for granted.

This spring break started with an amazing trip to Seattle to see my dear friend Sharon. We laughed like silly school girls, buzzed around in her cute red convertible and just had a blast. This trip we had a late celebration for my February birthday, and Sharon treated me with such kindness and generosity that my heart overflowed with gratitude. Besides great girlfriend time, I could see sunny Seattle in all her glory with daffodils and cherry trees in full bloom. I couldn't stop smiling. I felt grateful for my friend Sharon and grateful to God for every flower and ray of sunshine.

I came back to Spokane and found some of those nearest and dearest to me with major health issues: one of Bert's best friends in a comma with heart failure, Nancy with an emergency appendix operation, Eileen with cancer back, an operation, and chemotherapy, Rog Sr. with a serious operation...the list goes on and on. I kept praying and visiting the hospital and got to know the second and fifth floors of Sacred Heart all too well.

As my dear Mom used to say, "Getting older isn't for sissies!"

Yet in all of it, I saw God's grace and love at work. I saw anew how much all of these people have blessed my life. I felt grateful to be able to sit next to them at the hospital, hold their hand, and just watch March Madness on television. One lesson played out over and over again...It's just plain easy to take people for granted. This time of visiting the hospital was a much needed reminder that we can all be gone in an instant, and we need to let others know how much they mean to us.

I need to remember that lesson on a daily basis.

So as Easter approaches, and I am aware of God's great gift in the death and resurrection of Jesus, I am again filled with so much gratitude. I am reminded again that I am loved, just as I am, that I am forgiven, and that I have a new life because of God's gift to me. What a blessing to know this kind of love.

Today, I am just so grateful...for it all!

God Bless!

Have a blessed Easter!

Love Linda

If I'd Only Known...

2010-02-19T18:12:00.000-08:00

I was headed back this morning from my usual trip to Safeway at 5:20 am. I went to the Starbucks there to get an espresso- a vente, iced mocha, single shot, skinny milk, and light on the chocolate.

After sipping on my morning pick-me-up, I got back in my car and drove on 27th, the street behind Safeway, right past Staneks Florists. I looked up and saw a sign, the kind where you put the letters up on a long stick. The sign read "Get your Valentine flowers here."

I always check those messages on the reader boards. The teacher in me looks for spelling and grammatical errors. As I saw the sign at Staneks I thought to myself... Well, they need to change that sign. It's past Valentines Day. Maybe, I thought to myself, they should have it read..."when was the last time you sent flowers to your mother?"

The thought was floating through my mind, when all of a sudden it hit me. It hit me like a ton of bricks, almost as if someone had sucker punched me in the stomach....It's February 19th, my Mom's birthday. It hit me so hard that I had to pull the car over to the side of the road, and I just couldn't stop crying. I wished I could send my Mom flowers. How many years had it been since she passed away?

I finally pulled myself together and started the ride to school. All the way there I composed a letter in my head to my Mom. It went something like this...

Mom,

I miss you! Happy Birthday! I didn't forget.

If I'd only known how much I would miss you, I would have been even more appreciative of every moment I had with you.

If I'd only known how much I'd miss the sound of your voice on the phone, I would have called you more often.

If I'd only known how much your advice and wise counsel would mean today, I would have listened more to what you had to say then.

If I'd only known how much I would love to have you here to spend a day with, I would have taken even more time with you to have lunch or just talk.

If I'd only known what it was like when you were gone, I would never let any small irritation about you get to me. At times I felt irritated at you, for the most stupid things.

If I'd only known what it was like to miss you, I'd have told you over and over and over and over again how much you mean to me.

If I'd only known how it hurts every day to have you gone, I would have taken more care so that you never felt I took you for granted.

If I'd only known that there are no perfect Moms, I certainly am not one, I would have seen that you were about as perfect as any Mom could ever be. You loved me deeply then, and I can still feel that love in my heart now.

If I'd only known that many of the things I was so "busy" with really weren't life-shattering events, I would have seen how much my paying more attention to you would have meant the world to you.

If I'd only known...

I miss you Mom. I miss you every day. I will miss you until I take my last breath on this planet.

I am largely who I am because you were there for me in the most important years of my life. You came to everything I did when I was little. You had my back. You loved me just as I was. You carpooled me everywhere. You knew my teacher's names. You believed in me, so I began to believe in myself. You listened to the tiny details that no one else really wanted to hear. You were a gift from God to me.

I love you Mom!

Happy Birthday!

Love Punk...your very own daughter!

Some Lessons From My Precious Grandchildren!

2010-01-30T05:15:00.000-08:00

I remember well when my Dad got a license plate holder that had a saying on it. He had a Cadillac and was a no frills guy, so some car decor was a surprise.

The license plate holder simply said, "I am a proud Grandpa!"

Jessi and Amy literally melted his heart. He adored them. He turned into mush when they were around. They had him wrapped around their little fingers. This big, huge mountain-of-a-man was literally smitten with those two darling daughters of mine. He used to say, "I am learning about life all over again through their eyes."

Well Dad, first of all, I miss you every day. Second of all, now I get exactly what you meant. Me too! I am smitten. MY grandbabies have melted my heart. I am learning some of life's most precious "lessons" through their eyes!

Side Note: So no one feels left out, this post will only cover several of my precious grandbabies and I'll cover some of the others in future posts. :)

Let's start with...a drum roll please:

EMMA SEPPA THOMPSON-

Ah, Emma! Last night Bert and I were downtown for dinner and a movie. We chose to eat at the Nordstrom Cafe. As we entered Nordstoms I began to chuckle. Bert asked me what was so funny. I recounted a recent shopping trip Emma and I took downtown and our walk through Nordstoms where she wore the most amazing fedora-like hat with a black sequined band. She had on a neck scarf, skinny jeans, and a grin from here to Alaska. THAT GIRL HAS HER OWN UNIQUE STYLE! She could have been right out of a fashion magazine!

I can't tell you how many Nordstrom salespeople stopped Emma and said, with some reverence, "Wow, niiiiiccceee Hat! I LOVE it! You look great!" Emma would just grin, say "thanks" (as she has impeccable manners), and she literally swaggered through the store with such fun and self-confidence that she left a trail of grins in her path. I giggle every time I re-live that memory!

Emma and I did a MAJOR shopping trip together at Christmas time where she picked out presents for her parents and Boppa. Every present she picked out had her own unique sense of taste, fashion sense, and color. Emma likes to refer to me as "My best shopping girl!" and I stand in amazement at her sense of style. After all, though it's hard to remember, SHE IS SIX AND A HALF YEARS OLD. YIKES!

Yet Emma is more than just someone with style. She lives life "all out" and pushes the envelope in everything she does. As I watch her swim or run, go to some of her kids triathlons, and hear about her snow skiing adventures, I am in awe of her guts, determination and love for life! Thanks for the great reminders, Emma, about really loving life and living it to the fullest! You are MY best shopping girl too! I love you to the moon and back!

LESSONS LEARNED FROM EMMA:
Be a "go-getter" in everything you do! Give it all (shopping, swimming, running...) 110% effort! And while you are at it, for heavens sake, have your OWN style, a style that makes you happy to look in the mirror, makes you whistle while you walk, gives a little bounce to your step! Live life and be all you can be!

Drum roll please...

JACOB PAUL HONEYCUTT-

Ah, Jacob! It is so hard to believe that you are eight years old. Where has the time gone? You hold such a special place in my heart, and in your Boppa's too. I remember so well having you at the dinner table, years ago, and we were talking about God and someone who didn't believe in Him. Very dramatically you fell to the floor, legs up, and declared dramatically, "WHO couldn't believe in GOD!!??"..rolled your eyes, and pretended to be dead!

From the time you were little you have reminded me that God loves me. You have reminded me to pray at meals. You have reminded me that kindness to others trumps every other human act. Just recently, when you were over at our house, you knew that Jenna would like to play the harmonica. You looked all over, found the harmonica, and without blowing it once yourself (with the kindest look on your face) you gave the harmonica directly to her. But what all of us who watched this act of kindness knew was...YOU love to play that harmonica. But you set that aside to be selfless with your sister! Your Mama also told us the story of when you were at one of Papa's basketball games, and he was sweating and asked for a towel, and you took the t-shirt off your back and gave it to Papa to use since no towel was around. All I can say is "WOW!"

Your heart-of-gold and feelings on your sleeve approach to life, your loyalty to those you love and sense of protection for your Mama...well, you inspire me! Thanks for the important reminders sweetie! I love you to the moon and back!

LESSONS LEARNED FROM JACOB:
Remember to be grateful to God for everything! Remember that He created you. Live your life with the Lord in the center.
Cherish those you love that you call your family! See the best in them as they might be gone tomorrow. Forgive them, stick up for them! And be kind and unselfish. Don't be afraid to be humble. Give away the things you love most and you will be truly blessed.

Drum roll please...

JENNA MARIE FARRELL-

Ah, Jenna! Just thinking of you makes me grin from ear to ear. You are such a hoot! Your crazy hair, love for life, super grin, love for "My skool!"...it all just cracks me up! You are the miracle baby, the baby God gave to your Mama and Papa. You are the sweet daughter your Mama had longed for. Yup, you are an answer to a thousand prayers.

Yet little did I know that God also sent you to our family to help heal my heart! Time with you has been a balm and healer to my soul. Your hugs and unconditional love have brought back my smile. Every time you put a hand on your hip and announced, "You stay, I go!" I broke into giggles. Seeing you drag around your Dora "back pack" filled with your treasures, watching Dora with you, seeing you color pictures, hearing you clap and yell for Emma as you watched her at a race...it all makes me smile. You are so loyal and possessive of those you love... your love for YOUR family, YOUR Momma, YOUR Daddy, YOUR Pooky, YOUR Boppy, YOUR Sissy, YOUR Zacky Poo...you claim us all with such zigor and assurance!

Thanks sweetie for reminding me that I am dearly loved and claimed by you as YOUR Nana! I love you to the moon and back!

LESSONS LEARNED FROM JENNA:
Just be yourself! Have fun! Remember to laugh! Give great hugs and snuggles to those who are sad. Be dramatic, it won't kill you or those around you. Make them laugh by being silly. And most of all...claim those you love! They are YOUR sweeties, YOUR loved ones. Let them know it too!

In short, I am so blessed to have these precious grandbabies in my life! My Dad was soooo right! I am learning about life all over again through their eyes!

God Bless!
Love Linda

A Look Back on 2009..Some Tough Questions and Some New Resolve.

2010-01-10T07:50:00.000-08:00

*Disclaimer- A Word of Warning: This post is not easy to write and perhaps not easy to read. Only proceed ahead if you have the courage to know more about me.

Recently Bert and I sat down to review 2009. I love how, in some cultures, they name a year..."The Year of the Boar", or "The Year of the Pig."

2009 was the year I had dubbed as "The Year of the Flood." I used that term, not so affectionately, since 2009 started with a major flood from our third floor deck that took from January 2009 until late September 2009 to remedy.

Yet "the flood", in my mind, was both literal and figurative. 2009 felt like a year that required a HUGE, HUGE effort on almost every front. While I could pull out some wonderful moments in my memory for '09, and each of those is a blessing I hold dear, the overwhelming sense of "struggle" that was 2009 left me feeling drained and sad. I must have said a thousand times, "God won't give me more than I can handle", but by the end of 2009 my words seemed somewhat hollow.

A good friend asked me a question during all of this. A question of sorts, but more of a statement. She said, "I look at you Christians and kind of laugh. Aren't you caught between a rock and a hard spot? If you screw up and are human, we see you as hypocrites (not living up to your faith), but if things go really well and as you say "prayers are answered", we also are skeptical.
Some of you (and she was kind enough to qualify not me) think you are so perfect. Life is easy for you since you can give God the glory or just say this wasn't in His plans. Which is it?"

Now to some folks, this kind of a question might seem disrespectful to my Faith, yet with my best friends, those I am most comfortable with, we can put huge differences out on the table. We can ask the hard questions and talk about them respectfully.

I answered this complex inquiry in this way:
* Life is NOT easy being a Christian. In fact, the Bible tells me that my life will be harder.
* I am trying, with God's help, to do what He would have me do in situations. I am ANYTHING but perfect. But what I know is that God forgives me, even if some people can't. He holds a high standard for my life and He is ultimately the One I have to be accountable to for all that I do.

I talked to God alot during 2009. Like Ann Lamot says. "He can take whatever questions or rantings you need to give Him."
When my heart felt broken in 2009, broken like it would never come back together again, I turned to Him.
I asked Him how I could have tried so hard to do the right thing and ended up in this place?

Bert has walked with me through all of the hills and valleys of this challenging year. He has listened endlessly as I have cried, sobbed, and questioned. He has been my Hero!

And as we sat down and reviewed this chaotic year, the "Year of the Flood", he said this to me, in his own wise, wonderful and quiet fashion...

"It's really a choice," he said. "You did the best you could, every day. You tried to be loving and honest, and you tackled some huge and very tough challenges, turning to God with every decision."

And then he said "the clincher", the words that helped put 2009 into perspective for me...

"This year made you STRONGER. Easy years don't, but tough years build your character!. I'm proud of you, Honey, that you hung in there to do what you thought was right"

WOW!

So, TAKE THAT... 2009! I built more character, because of you! I am stronger, because of you! I am closer to God, because of you! I know who my true friends are, because of you! I look forward to 2010, taking all the lessons you taught me!

I AM STILL STANDING, in spite of you! And for that...I praise God!

No matter what happens in 2010...easy or hard, challenged or bombarded...I can do ALL things through Christ who strengthens me.

And she found her soul saying a hearty "AMEN, to that sister!"

God Bless!
Love Linda

**PS. When I finished reading this blog entry to Bert, and turned around in our living room to look out the window, we saw a HUGE, triple rainbow...bright and shining, a full rainbow... or as Bert said, "A big ass rainbow!"
Looks to me like God heard me and He's smiling... :)

Emily Concert

2009-12-20T09:39:00.001-08:00

At Our Home...We Are All About the Christmas Spirit!

2009-12-13T05:54:00.000-08:00

Ever since I was a little girl I have loved and adored Christmas. I love celebrating the birthday and gift of Jesus! I love the colored lights outdoors and driving around at night, sipping hot chocolate, and going "Ooooh" and "Ahhhh" over amazing landscapes of outdoor Christmas scenes. I love recounting old Christmas stories from when I was little and making new Christmas memories with those I love. I love all of the shopping and decorating...I LOVE it all and look forward to it all year long.

Here are a few of the the sights, smells, and activities that are blessing us this Christmas:

1) Going to the The Lion King Musical With Emma!

What a great way to start the holiday season! Some years back Bert and I took Jessi and Amy and their families to the Lion King musical in Spokane. We absolutely LOVED the fabulous story, all of the music, the realistic sets and the most amazing costumes ever! The huge (and I do mean huge) animals parade through the theatre and are almost in your lap. Emma was so little at the time we went that she didn't go with us as we thought she might be frightened. So when the Lion King came back to town, Bert and I invited Emma for a solo lunch and musical event. It is so great to have one-on-one time with our grandchildren (and it's not easy to do since we have 12 of them). We loved every minute with Emma and will always remember her amazed face during the opening number!

Thanks Emma for sharing this fun Christmas "date" with Boppa and with me!

2) Decorating Our Home For The Holidays!

At Christmas time I love taking special care with creating little scenes or vinyettes in our home. I change what we do every year, and it's a chance for me to do some of the decorating and design that pleases my heart! This year, instead of the usual red and green theme, we went with more neutrals and "subtle scapes" with creams, tans, golds, silvers and bronzes. We even used sea shells we have collected in Hawaii! While our home doesn't "scream" Christmas (as it often does :)) it has been soothing to my heart to try this new gentle reminder of the holidays!

Here are a few of Christmas scenes at our home:

3) Special Books For The Christmas Season!

For us, Christmas is all about opening our hearts and appreciating God's gift in Jesus!

I am always an avid reader and once my grades are in at the college you may find me next to the fireplace, coffee mug in hand, reading some old and new "favoritos"! Here are several that came to me from special friends in my life":

*have a little faith- by Mitch Albom, the amazing author of Tuesdays With Morrie!

This inspiring true story details the author's eight year journey between two world's of faith- Christian and Jewish, rich and poor, white and African- American and two men... the author's rabbi and an inner city poor African-American pastor. A perfect Christmas read.

My book review: WOW! *****

*Advent and Christmas-Wisdom From Henri J.M. Nouwen , one of my all-time favorite writers of faith.

This powerful little book has daily lessons and devotionals for Advent and the Christmas season that really open your heart to the real meaning of Christmas. A very humbling and introspective read about what it really means to follow Jesus when you are a flawed human being like I am.

My book review: Double WOW! *****

Thank you Ashley Ulmer, consulting client and friend, for knowing exactly what I needed this Christmas season!

4) Amazing Christmas Music- New Favorites!

Andrea Bocelli is one of my all-time favorite singers. His heavenly voice in a new CD- "Andrea Bocelli-My Christmas" is beyond wonderful. Many years ago Jessi, Rog, Erik, Theresa and I saw

Andrea Bocelli in concert. It was a life-time memory for me. And here he is again singing Christmas tunes with Natalie Cole, Mary J Blige and others. What an amazing musical Christmas treat!

5) Special, Spontaneous Time With My Hubby!

Both Bert and I have busy and conflicting schedules. He works late three nights a week, has choir practice for our church, and I am busy with school and consulting activities. It is SO wonderful during the Christmas season to slow down the pace and have some fun couple's time together.

Most recently we went to Anna Seppa's fabulous Christmas concert with the Spokane Children's Choral group. What beautiful Christmas music, and Anna did an amazing job! She looked gorgeous in her long green skirt and black velvet top. Before the concert we went to our favorite Thai restaurant and had soup and capped off the evening following the concert with dessert at Lindamans. We both even got dressed up!

Thanks for inviting us to your concert Anna! We loved it and we are so delighted that you liked your flower bouquet!

6) More Christmas Memories to Follow!

I can hardly wait to see the Nutcracker Ballet with Jessi and Emma, have time at our church to celebrate Jesus, and precious time with family and friends. I may even get my annual Christmas card drawn, who knows! Besides all of the fun activities, I hope to still my life an my heart to make room for the real reason for the season...the birth of Jesus!

May you have a blessed Christmas too!

God Bless!

Love Linda

Even In The Hard Times...I Am Grateful

2009-11-24T02:52:00.000-08:00

Today is Tuesday and Thanksgiving is two days away. If you had asked me a year ago, at Thanksgiving time, where life would take me in a year...I could never have imagined the journey I would be on. I've been a Christian since I was 15, and have been through much joy and many trials over the years, but I've been talking to God a lot lately and all I can say is..."Please, HELP!"

The specifics of what is going aren't appropriate for this blog venue, but the lessons are. And some lessons in life are just darn hard to embrace. But at age 62 I know that some of the hardest "seasons" bring the greatest growth. I also know that "Everything is a gift, even if some things don't look gift wrapped". I also know, for sure, that God loves me, no matter what and that He is in the midst of all that is going on. So what have I learned? What am I now learning? Here are a few of the lessons in November 2009:

1) I've learned that you can put your whole heart and soul into something and not have it work out the way you wanted. You simply cannot control other people. You can't control who they are, how they think, and the choices they make. At the end of the day you are only responsible that you gave the important priorities in your life a 100% effort. If you have done that, that's all you can do. Work, pray, get help, work more...but at some point you can't do it alone.

2) I've learned that you are either in or you are out. If you can't say, "I'm all in..110%", and then act in, then you are really out. Words are cheap. Being in, acting in, and making that commitment is a choice. In my book we have to say "I'm all in!" to the important choices in our lives every day.

3) I've learned that if I've done what is right for me, followed the values I have and believe in, that I can survive others being mad at me or not understanding why I did what I did. For so much of my life I didn't want to make anyone unhappy, even if it meant me being unhappy. I didn't want to stick up for me if it meant someone I loved was mad at me. But after 60, I have a new sense of peace about doing the best I can, even if others reject me because of it. Make no mistake, the rejection really hurts...but I'll get through it.

4) I've learned that family is everything. You can't replace what it means to have your family love and support you. They are your rock, your foundation. No matter how imperfect it all is, at the end of the day the support of family sometimes means the difference between making it and falling apart. Having your family "show up", not just in words, but REALLY show up in deeds and behavior means the world to me.

5) I've learned, again and again, that my husband Bert is my life partner and supporter in the hardest of times. For over 28 years, and 25+ years being married, he has wiped away my tears and listened endlessly. When my heart is breaking, he is there. When I am full of joy, he is there. He is there, and I am grateful.

6) I've learned, and this isn't a new learning, that I love my daughters with all of my heart. I always have and always will. I'm not a perfect Mom, but I am their Mom. When their hearts break, mine does too. When they succeed and are happy, I am too. Don't misunderstand, my happiness is not just connected to their happiness, but my heart is always connected to them. It will be until the day that I die. My Mom's heart was like that too. She used to say to me, "A mother is only as happy as her unhappiest child." Even though they are both adults, I still love them the way I did when they were small girls.

7) I've learned that my precious grandchildren warm my heart and bring me joy in ways that nothing else does.

8) I've learned (this last Sunday) that I may be, as Tim said Sunday, a bit "accident prone".:) I say that with a smile. Who in the heck drops a hot curling iron on their eye? That's right...EYE!

Specifically...eye lid and eye ball. Who has to go to the doctor and say, "I'm here because my hand, somewhat arthritic as it is, dropped the super hot curling iron on my face and hit my eye and eye ball?" Even Dr. Staley laughed and with a gleam in his eye offered me this. "Well Linda, my worst patient ever, I have had some twenty year olds come in with this and they weren't all air-heads." So I've learned not to rush around when I've got a curling iron in my hand. Makes ya humble! :)

9) I've learned that no matter what, I want to focus on all of the blessings in my life. I am grateful, so grateful, for so many things. God has been very good to me and I don't take His blessings for granted.

So as Thanksgiving 2009 approaches, I am far richer in spirit and faith because of the "life lessons" I am learning! God holds me in the palm of His loving hand. He answers prayers. He can do miracles! For that, my heart overflows with gratitude.

Happy Thanksgiving!

God Bless!

Love Linda

Great Moments!

2009-10-02T04:25:00.000-07:00

As I sit with a cup of coffee this morning, and reflect back over the past few weeks, I am struck by all of the amazing things that have gone on. Some of the moments have been life-changing. Other small moments have touched my heart. I am aware that each day has brought "great moments" my way...small gifts to my spirit that bring life and joy to my heart. Here are a few of those moments:

The start of school has been wonderful, hectic, challenging and a true JOY! I love teaching and all that comes with it! There have been many "great moments" with my new and former students!

Not only that, I am getting to see Amy teach an Interpersonal Communication class. Her class presentation yesterday was what I like to call "Fabulous Teaching!" She had the students engaged, had a dynamite power point presentation, had a super visual poster to give them a sample of their assignment for Monday, and her handouts were amazing! I took notes and came away with new learnings I will share with my 8:30 class! It was a "great moment" to see her teach! It was also a great, great moment to see Amy complete a 1/2 marathon recently!! It was also a "great moment" to see KK complete a 10K!!

Another "great moment" for me came this last Wednesday as I watched Jacob run his first cross country race for his grade school, Balboa Elementary. Jacob and his best friend Caleb love to do almost anything together, and they both are on the cross country team, complete with uniforms!! What a treat to see them get out there, with children from five other schools, and run and run!!

I also had a great moment with Jenna at that race. She is such a "hoot"...so funny and so expressive. I was trying to hold her so Amy could take pictures and she looked at me, and with a dramatic scowl said, "Nana, you stuck me!" Stuck me? I looked around to see if something on my clothing had pinched her ? Amy translated that this meant that I was holding her and not letting her go...when she wanted badly to go! I've been laughing all week about that moment!

Jenna lights up my life! It's so fun to hear her say, "I luv my skool!"

My "great moment" with Emma came yesterday when I presented her a bag with some "goodies" for her upcoming trip to Hawaii!. One of my students told me about a store called "Justice" at the Northtown mall. I had a few minutes yesterday so I went there in search of "cool stuff" for Emma to take on her trip. I found a great bag, shorts, a top, a journal that "lights up" on the cover (I'm not kidding), and a cool card with flip flops on the cover. I also casually slipped a $2o.oo bill into the card.

Emma was so appreciative for the bag and its goodies, but when she saw the $20 bill she was beyond excited. Her words ring in my ears and put a grin on my face. She said, giving me a hug,"Nana, you saved my life!" Absolutely the best $20 I've ever spent!! :) :) It was also fun to go to Emma's soccer game this past weekend!

Life is FULL of "great moments", small moments that can bring great JOY! Today I am focusing on all of the blessings and great moments that God has generously given me. Seeing Amy teach, having lunch with her afterwards, having dinner with Jessi (Rog and Emma too) and time with my precious grandbabies...these are all "great moments" in my life!

Seeing my family, and spending time with them, puts a grin on my face and a smile in my heart!

I hope you all have some "great moments" this weekend!

God Bless!

Love Linda

Rendered Speechless...Still I Will Say...Blessed Be The Name of The Lord!

2009-09-04T05:30:00.000-07:00

Most people who know me know that words usually come easily to me. I teach communication classes, write speeches, give speeches, and talk freely. Not lately.

I have been, as my Mom and Nana used to say, "rendered almost speechless" by the events of late. I've tried to blog about it all, but the words just weren't there.

Until this morning.

I went on a Christian Mom's blog I follow. Her daughter was born with a congenital heart defect and she had a song on her blog that brought me to tears. The title is "Blessed Be Your Name."

Hearing this music, and seeing these lyrics, says it all for me right now. So much has happened...

Amy running at the lake and being hit by a car. This broke my heart.

Mary Ann Sanger dies

My knee injury

Some people I thought would really show up (physically and emotionally) in tough times didn't

More cuts at the college

Getting a horrible case of the flu

Feeling sad about some relationship dynamics

Bill Greene having a heart triple bypass operation

Donna, in our church choir, having to give up singing because of medical problems in her throat

The list goes on and on and my heart has felt heavy and sad, yet I just couldn't find the words to talk about it. Until today.

I know well, after 62 years on the planet, and becoming a Christian at age 14, that there are times, as the song says, "when the sun's shining down on me..and the world's all as it should be". Most of my life resembles these words. I have been truly blessed with love and health most of my life.

I also know that the times that really grow me, the times that challenge me and hurt me, are the times when I lean the most on God. Those are the times "marked with suffering and there's pain in the offering." I would never choose those times, but I CAN choose to grow from them and get through them with Grace.

So today, the words are flowing and I am praising God, no matter what!

"My heart will choose to say

God blessed be Your name!"

God Bless!

Love Linda

Near Tears....

2009-08-13T04:33:00.000-07:00

Most days I wake up and feel boyant and happy. Today isn't one of those days. I feel near tears and somewhat overwhelmed. Lots of reasons for this.

I vowed I'd be transparent in writing this blog and while I don't get into all the details of my intimate life, I don't want to gloss over the truth.

I have an overwhelming feeling of missing my Mom and wishing I could call her so she could reassure me (oops not near tears now, pretty much sobbing). I just plain miss her and her wisdom.

I wonder how God can be so patient and forgiving of me as I struggle to be the person He intends me to be (blowing my nose now, this isn't pretty). There is so much I don't understand as I see hurt people and know that I have hurt people too.

Recently several dear friends, like Mary Ann Sanger, have died. I miss them. Not easy at all to have them gone.

We got another letter that we are having another 2% cut at the college. That's on top of the 7% cut we have already taken. I'm on a committee to work on the "where will we get it from now?"
Yikes!

I'm tired, just plain tired, of living in a construction zone since last January. The rain has stopped the work on the outside of our house, so construction has again been delayed and the "finish date" extended. As I write this I realize it sounds like whining, and I hate whining, but I'm really disappointed in this delay.

I've been working on cleaning out our house, one drawer at a time. It's not how I want to spend my time, but it is how I need to spend my time. Yuck!! WAY overdue!!

I miss hugging my kids and grandkids. They are growing up so fast. I have seen them recently, but there is never enough time. Someone who is critical could argue with me to stop working or it's a matter of prioritizing choices...yup, I know that, but that's just how I feel right now. Finding that balance isn't easy.

Lots of things are changing. Some of those "things" are relationships that mean alot to me. I know that change is good, but it isn't always easy. I'm trying to be flexible and "go with the flow". Not my strong suit.

I wish I could have a big, big cry like Jenna, say "I'm sorry" and feel better.

I know in my heart of hearts that it's ok to be sad, it's ok to be near tears, it's ok to be where I am. I know I'll be better soon.

I can hear my Dad in the back of my head.."You get five total minutes in your life to whine...."
OK Dad...my time is up!

God Bless!
Love, Linda

I

Change, Change, and More Change!...The Construction Continues!

2009-07-28T04:25:00.000-07:00

One of my favorite quotations says:
"Everything is a gift. It's just that some things don't look gift wrapped!"

Last January, shortly after returning from Hawaii, we had a flood at our home. Snow had piled up on the deck outside our master bedroom (on our third floor) and as there was a sudden melt, the ice jammed the drain. Water seeped under the sliding glass door, drenched the entire carpet upstairs, and I came home (after the first day of school) to water pouring out of the recessed lighting in the kitchen, dining room, and living room (on the second floor). Gallons and gallons and gallons of water! What a mess!!!

We brought in a water evacuation and construction company who ripped up carpet on two floors of our home and tried to dry us out with the promise that when the weather warmed up we would take out the damaged dry wall, repair the damaged stucco on the outside of our home, repaint the inside and outside, and ultimately be good as new.

This process of "change for the better" (as we've labeled this process) has been going on at our home since January. We've had construction workers here almost daily for the last three months (since May) and needed to stay here to help oversee the myriad of decisions that needed to be made.

As of this week, the furniture is mostly back in place (instead of piled in the center of the living room) and the dust has been vacuumed from the furnace and air system. We recently found the remote for the tv and all of the beautiful changes and fresh paint make us look better than new! :)

While I was in Cannon Beach, Bert spent hours and hours in the clean up process, and we will probably make even more progress in the "put it back together" phase in the next two weeks!

Yesterday they power washed the outside of our home and the outside paint job begins later this week! Huge ladders are everywhere as we are in a four story town home.

The final stage is to have the tiles on the roof put back on. That's right...the roof also needed repair and much of our roof has been sitting on our deck, waiting to be reassembled!

Ah, change!

While all of this construction doesn't lend itself to the usual, relaxed, and less-stressed mode of operation in the summer....the long-range benefits are worth all of the inconveniences!

We are blessed to have home insurance which will pay for some, but not all, of these expenses.
We are blessed to have great workers who are easy to be around at 7am in the morning! :)
We are blessed that the damage wasn't much worse!! We are grateful to have things fresh and painted!

While living in a construction zone isn't easy, and living in disarray is a change that is challenging, we are focusing on all the blessings!

Sending hugs and loves your way...no matter the challenge or change!
God Bless!
Love Linda

LINDA and SHARON : UNPLUGGED!!!!

2009-07-27T16:28:00.000-07:00

There really are not words to describe how wonderful it is to go to Cannon Beach every year with my friend Sharon. Sharon's sister, Colleen, described the time as "Linda and Sharon: "Unplugged!"

It really is a time of momentous change for me:

1) Usually, in Spokane, I am up by 3:30-4am- At Cannon Beach I slept in once until 7am!! :)

2) Usually I am focused on teaching, consulting and family- At Cannon Beach I am focused on rest, renewal, fun, exercise, and time with God!!

3) Usually I am reading books that have "redeeming value" that I can utilize in teaching or consulting- At Cannon Beach I usually read 6-7 books in a week and they all stretch my soul and energize my heart!

4) Usually I walk inside every morning at SCC , at 5:45 am, and go around the halls and up and down the stairwells.- At Cannon Beach I walked every morning along the ocean and back through the town! What a spectacular view !!

5) Usually I am focused, task-driven and fairly serious about getting "stuff" done.- At Cannon Beach I laugh myself silly with Sharon until I am breathless. I also cry by the ocean and pour out to God the hurts in my life.

The list goes on and on!

This time of renewal at Cannon Beach is such a HUGE blessing in my life and my physical, emotional, intellectual and spiritual life is reenergized and enhanced because of it!

I am deeply grateful!

I hope you have some "unplugged" time this summer too!
God Bless!
Love Linda

WHERE I AM TODAY: Reigniting My Own Spirit!

2009-06-29T06:34:00.000-07:00

My beloved Bert, who knows me so, so well,often says that I take life on as if there was no tomorrow and that I do EVERYTHING in a BIG way! He smiles when he says this and often chuckles and shakes his head.

My high school counselor Dale Hanberg, who saw me involved in almost every activity in high school, smiled at me and chuckled when he told me that if I didn't slow down that I'd burn out by thirty. He said, "Linda, there is no one quite like you and none of us can keep up with you. The pace you keep, and the things you accomplish, always go above and beyond!" Again, Mr. Hanberg is someone who knew me well.

I've found over the past several years of blogging that there are several reoccuring themes that echo Bert's and Mr. Hanberg's descriptions of me:
1) I love what I do at work and with my family.
2) I am passionate about being a teacher, consultant and all of the personal roles like wife, Mom, Nana, and friend.
3) It's hard to find time for everything I love to do.
4) I need a more balanced life with more time for fun.
5) I often resist making choices that balance my life.
6) My life is way more balanced in the summer!

I notice this lack of balance most accutely at the end of the school year when I feel I am literally going full speed at every moment. As Wayne Dyer says in his book "Being In Balance"...
"There is more to life than making it go faster."

However the end of the year has a pace all its own, and "balance" is in short supply in my life.

On June 17th I did a workshop for a wonderful consulting client, June 18th was graduation at SCC, and Friday, June 19th, my grades went in at SCC. Granted,these activities are all part and parcel of choices I have made and requirements for my jobs. However, within minutes of my grades going in it felt like I was starting to breathe again. I found myself smiling, almost as if being "balanced" was right around the corner!!

Being balanced for me is not an absence of activity. Rather it is doing some of the "FUN STUFF" that reignites my spirit. So here are a few of the "reigniting" activities that have gone on recently:

1) GOING TO EMMA'S KINDERGARTEN GRADUATION:
Oh my gosh, where did this year go? It seems like only yesterday that I was putting balloons in Emma's front yard as she went to her first day of kindergarten. She was so little then in stature, but she had such a big spirit!! Watching Emma at her graduation celebration, and seeing her memory book in her classroom, was a great reminder that time flys. It was so fun to be a part of this celebration for her! She's off to first grade next year!

2) EMMA's OVERNIGHT AT OUR HOUSE/ CHEERING FOR JESSI and ROG AT THE MEDICAL LAKE TRIATHLON:
Friday June 19th Emma stayed overnight at our house. She is so amazing and so, so funny! She cracks herself up and everyone else in the process. She became "Ninja Girl" and walked around like Daniel in Karate Kid making Ninja movements, noises, and then falling into hysterical laughter. We did some crafting together as we were a "cheer squad" the next day at Rog and Jessi's Medical Lake Triathlon race. In true Emma and Nana style we went to Joann's, got glittery visors, tons of glittery stickers, a blue boa, and sign materials. Saturday morning after our slumber party, (we didn't get much sleep because of all the thunder and lightening), we crafted our little hearts out. We decorated our visors, matching water holders, and made signs. We then headed out to cheer! What a hoot!! Seeing Rog take first place at that race and Jessi take the first woman in the race made me, once again, appreciate their dedication, courage, and training for this sport!! We loved cheering for them!!

3) BIRTHDAY SPA TIME WITH JESSI:
June 24th hold special meaning for me since 32 years ago Jessi was born on that day. To celebrate her birthday this year, I took Jessi to Spa Paradiso where we both had massages and then had a wonderful Davenport lunch! What a treat to spend that fun and relaxing time together getting pampered!! Massages and spa time really reignite my spirit!!

4)JACOB'S OVERNIGHT BEFORE HOOPFEST WEEKEND/ FUN WITH JENNA:
The end of June is always crazy with athletic events like Ironman and Hoopfest! The night before Hoopfest started, and Ryan played for two teams, Jacob stayed overnight. It seems like ages since he has had time with us and that he has grown three inches since his last overnight. He and Boppa played basketball and we watched fun movies. The next day we had Jenna, since hours of being on basketball courts in the heat doesn't work well for her, and we went to the water park on the south hill. She is such an energetic cutie and she loved running through the spraying water. What a hoot!!

5) TIME AT THE LAKE:
Since our townhouse is in the midst of construction from our winter flood, and there is dust and construction everywhere, Bert and I took some time to go to the lake and have fun in the sun. My favorite part of our time there was going on the inner tube behind the boat and laughing myself silly!! What a treat to reignite my spirit by just having FUN!!! It was also especially great to have some time with Zac and Kayla. Zac is headed to high school next year and is so tall that he towers over me. Kayla is headed to middle school and is a beautiful young lady both inside and out. It feels like I hardly have time with either of them during the regular school year so some catch up time is so important.

Catching up with myself and those I love is a huge part of reigniting my spirit!!

Speaking of catching up with myself...I head to my annual retreat to Cannon Beach at the end of this next week. My dear friend Sharon and I look forward to this retreat and rejuvination time all year long! This year has been rewarding and very challenging so I feel blessed to get away and get rejuvinated- spiritually, physically, intellectually and emotionally!

Before I head off however I'm headed to SCC this morning to finish cleaning my office and room and get ready for fall quarter!:) Somehow being a teacher never ends! :)

I hope your summer time is full of love, fun, personal rejuvination, and blessings!
God Bless!
Love Linda

Somewhere Over the Rainbow!

2009-06-09T20:48:00.000-07:00

Wow! What a weekend in Puyallup! The highlight was, without a doubt, hearing Emily sing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow" in Ella Fitzgerald fashion! Better yet, she publically dedicated it to her Grandpa Bert, and it's his favorite song! Lots of tears! We are so proud of Emily and all her hard work with drama and singing. She is one gifted girl!!

I'll do a longer catch up post AFTER finals are over!!
God Bless!
Love and hugs to all of you!
Linda

WOW,WOW, and WOW AGAIN!: Amy Gets Her Masters Degree From Gonzaga University!!

2009-05-13T08:22:00.000-07:00

One of the truly fun parts of being a Mom is seeing all of the milestones my children go through as they grow up....their first steps, first day of school, first date, graduation from high school, graduation from college, getting married, birth of their first child...the list goes on and on. My prayer has always been that they would grow up to be who they are uniquely meant to be, be happy in their own skin, know that God loves them, and that they would fulfill their dreams.

Last Saturday my precious daughter Amy achieved one of her dreams. She graduated from Gonzaga University with a Masters degree in Communications and Leadership Studies. She set a goal, she dedicated herself to achieving it, and she accomplished it in style- getting an A in every class and special recognition of her Masters thesis about intrinsic and extrinsic motivation in the workplace.

How Amy achieved this dream is beyond amazing to me. I too have a masters degree (two of them) and the work load at the post-graduate level to achieve a Masters Degree is incomprehensible to most people, unless you have done it. There are hours and hours of going to class, reading academic works, writing and rewriting papers, conferences with academic advisors, presentations to give, more papers to write, an oral exam and presentation of your thesis, and writing a thesis that is scrutinized by an academic committee of the faculty of the university.

It is rigorus academic work under any circumstances. Yet to do it , as Amy did, while working part time as the manager of a consulting practice, getting pregnant and have a new baby, being an exceptional Mom to four children (and attend all their activities), being an amazing wife, daughter, sister, and friend, participating in a church, and driving children in cars for hours and hours...and hours....well that to me defines an exceptional effort and achievement.

Yet since Amy was a little girl she has never been one to "toot her own horn!" She is very humble and grateful for the opportunity to get an education, but she will be the last person to tell you she got an A in all of her classes or that she did her studying at night so her children wouldn't have to compete with school for her attention.

Saturday was Amy's day...her graduation day. Not only did she look beautiful, she looked radiant. Seeing her cross that stage, and seeing her at her graduation party, warmed my heart.

She was surrounded by Ryan and all four of her precious children, her family, her best friend Jodi and her family...it just doesn't get better than that!

So here's to YOU Aim! I'm bringing a band of horns, trumpets, a big brass band, to "toot your horn" for you! Boppa and I are SO, SO proud of you...who you are as a person, your love for the Lord. the servant heart you have for others, and this huge accomplishment of getting your Masters degree! We love you to the moon and back, and we are proud that you are our daughter!!

May God bless you and keep you and make His face to shine upon you and give you joy and peace! May you always know His love for you and that you are His beloved child!

Your proud Momma

Spring Communication Conference- WE DID IT!!!

2009-05-06T06:35:00.000-07:00

WOW! It was a bit like birthing a baby...months and months of preparation and hard work, concern and intention...a goal to put on a conference for SCC and the community.

The Spring Communication conference has become an annual event in my life. Five years ago I agreed to take it over to see if we could make it more professional and really highlight our department and bring in new students. I saw this event as a marketing opportunity extraordinare, if we stepped up to REALLY showcase what we give to students in our classes. It could also be a gift to our community because we could market it in Spokane as a free opportunity for education.

What continues to amaze me is that this event grows and grows, and we now have a class that puts this on as a communications internship for students in our communications program. This year we had three student managers and ran it as a business. While I was the CEO, the managers (who participated in the conference last year) learned management skills as they supervised key committees.

This may sound pretty "typical" for a business, yet we were putting on a conference for 1000 people, decorating the huge conference center, providing food, muffins, fruit trays, juice and coffee for a thousand, brochures, marketing postcards and more...on a BUDGET OF $00.00.

That's right NO MONEY!

This student-run conference had to get donations during a recession to function. And they DID IT BIG TIME!!

The marketing blitz was phenominal..complete with professional postcard invitations, readerboard signs, brochures put out, invitation speeches made in classes and churches, and signs everywhere!

This year we had 1100 total participants, gorgeous decorations and flowers, balloons everywhere, platters of fruit and food, Roberta Greene as the keynote speaker, eight other workshops following, and a celebration luncheon to boot.

My role on May 5th was to be the MC for the keynote session, introduce the keynote speaker,

and give two workshops, one at 9:30 with Scott Finnie and one at 10:30 on "How To Become An Optimist!"

Whew! It was an amazing experience with so many highlights...filled with hundreds of hours of work for me and not much sleep:) But seeing the students be self-empowered and do what seemed impossible with such hard work and professionalism made it WELL worth the hard work. Also, when we look at the FTE numbers for our department, we are up 30% since last year! That means more of our students at SCC are being exposed to how to be better communicators!! Another goal reached!

Thanks to all who asked about how it went and special KUDOS to Bert and Amy for coming to the conference to support me (and to Tim for taking care of Jenna so Amy could attend)!:)

As I always say...I have the best job in the world!

God Bless!

Love Linda

BLOOMSDAY 2009- "WE ARE WOMEN, HEAR US ROAR!"

2009-05-03T06:12:00.000-07:00

This quarter I have been teaching a Gender Communication class and it has brought up many memories for me of growing up female! Last week one of my female students was using a thesaurus and actually found us listed under "weaker sex"....She was furious as was I. Are you kidding me???

In 1972 (I was born in 1947) Helen Reddy sang a number one hit called "I Am Woman". This song was controversial at the time and yet is still applicable today. The lyrics say in part:

I am woman, hear me roar
In numbers too big to ignore
And I know too much to go back and pretend.

Cause I've heard it all before
And I've been down there on the floor
No one's ever going to keep me down again!

Today is Bloomsday and the race course will be crammed full of women runners. When Jessi and Amy were little we used to sit at the top of Doomsday Hill and yell for the wheelchair athletes. In 1986 I was running and did the Bloomsday course in one hour and twenty minutes....not a big deal by most standards, but great for ME! On another note, Bert did Bloomsday in 50 minutes when he was 50! Way to go Boppa!

And that's what it is really about in my book...EVERY woman having the right to achieve their FULL POTENTIAL with no artificial restrictions like gender.

This morning my daughter Jessi is in the second seed group and is wearing BLUE..she is number 721. She EARNED this place in the race and is running it so sick most folks would stay home. She'll be out there giving it her all! I'm ROOTING for you Jess Jess!

Amy's best friend Jodi is also running as fast as the wind! All I can say is WOW!! Get those Kenyans Jodi! No matter how fast you run...we are so proud of you!

While I am cheering for all of the athletes who have the guts to do Bloomsday, I am sending up a HUGE cheer for all of my "sisters" who are out there!

Give 'em heck ladies! Let's hear you ROAR!!!

God Bless!
Love Linda

"When You're Smiling, When You're Smiling...The Whole World Smiles With you..."

2009-04-24T03:11:00.000-07:00

Where have I been for the last month since the last time I blogged? Literally, in a whirlwind of activities. I got up this morning at 2am to work, and after a brief talk with God took the time to look back on the last month since spring "break". I use those two words loosely since it snowed (again) during this time and didn't feel much like spring, and it didn't seem like a break since I spent most of my time at school working on the spring conference. However, it was a great luxury to get up at 5 or 5:30 instead of my usual 2:30 or 3!

Here are a few of the "current events" in no particular order:

1) I am thrilled to be teaching a new class on gender communication, and I am loving all the new learning I am doing about my own gender and the opposite gender. I have 39 in that class (the cap is 27) and some folks are sitting on the floor since my classroom cannot accomodate that many desks. All have chosen to stay no matter the cramped quarters, and we are having a blast. :) Did you know that if you inject female baby monkeys with testosterone they will be as aggressive as male monkeys? Did you know that in families who choose to raise boys without any guns present as toys that the boys will make guns and swords out of carrots or even pieces of bread? Lots of work to prep for a new class, but well worth the effort!!

2) The Spring Communication Conference is right around the corner. This is an event at SCC, put on by my department, that I have been in charge of for the past four years. We now have a practical business communication class that helps to put on the conference with me, and it is a magical experience to watch students take full responsibility for putting on a conference for 1,ooo people with speakers, food, decorations, and marketing on a budget of ZERO DOLLARS! We get donations for everything. Yesterday we did a "marketing blitz" and it was a huge success! Very rewarding!! This year I have three managers who helped with the conference last year...what a gift! It takes hundreds of hours of work, but it is a life-like learning for my students!!

3) It was so, so fun to have the annual "Easter Extravaganza" at our home again for our entire extended family...complete with spring flowers everywhere, Easter baskets for all, a cool Easter egg hunt, and a wonderful brunch with yummy contributions from family members. I LOVED seeing everyone together having fun and relaxing, and since I love traditions this is one I want to keep up....no matter how busy I may be. He is risen!!

4) Easter weekend Emma came for an overnight and since Jessi and Rog were out of town at a triathlon I got to take her to her first soccer game in Deer Park. She is such an amzing little girl and watching her make 7 goals ( in the pouring down rain)was so fun. Plus her enthusiasm for decorating for Easter, and getting the eggs filled with candy and money, matches my own!!:) We had a blast , and having one-on-one time with her warmed my heart!

5) After our "flood" in January of this year (see previous post for pictures of water soaked carpet and waterfalls coming out of our recessed lighting), we are headed for some major reconstruction this late spring and summer. ..that will be BOTH inside and out as the damage is quite major. Most of the drywall ceilings on our main floor need to be replaced and everything painted. Flooring must come up in some rooms and be replaced. The contractor was here yesterday with a game plan. Since I hate having my home in any disarray, we are "reframing" this positively by saying that we are getting spruced up and insurance is paying for it. A gift that doesn't look gift wrapped!

6) Amy's car accident, where she was driving and another car went through a red light and smashed into the driver's side of her car, left us stunned, angry, sad, and grateful. She has had some awful whiplash-related hurts to deal with (and continuing pain and headaches)...but she could have easily been killed. We are SO grateful to God that she is recovering. My "Mommy's heart" almost breaks every time my daughters are hurt, and this was no exception. First a deer for Jessi and then a careless driver for Amy. God and I have had some long talks about all of this.

7) I have LOVED any time I have spent with grandchildren recently. They are growing up SO fast. Zac is such a fine, tall, and smart young man, and he is learning to DRIVE....that's right, like drive a car!! How can that be???? Having time with Kayla over spring break was such a joy and seeing her play soccer is great fun for me! She is a beautiful young lady, inside and out. Jacob is growing in leaps and bounds and is beyond wonderful and Jenna steals my heart every time I see her. She is talking up a storm and is as cute as her Mama!! What a joy it is to see the babies of my babies grow up to be wonderful, loving, caring, talented children!! Great parenting is going on!!

8) Oh...and one more reframe. We received notice from the IRS that we are being audited for 2005. Since many of our past IRS records were water soaked in the "flood"... as they were stored upstairs where the flood took place...I have been getting additional records from our banks and places we contribute to. It seems we make too many contributions to charity (more than the norm) and that kicks up the IRS red flag that something may be amiss. We tithe at our church (and did at two churches in 2005) and contribute to multiple organizations that need help (Christ's Kitchen, Cup of Cool Water etc). No matter what the cost or inconvenience...we will continue to be givers. We've been audited before and they owed us money when it was all done. But it's lots of extra work when your records look like a combination of cardboard box and paper mache. Again, we're keeping our sense of humor!

That's it for me as April almost comes to an end! Whew! We have so much to be grateful for. God is good and we are grateful! I keep singing the old tune my Mom and Dad loved..."when you're smiling, when you're smiling...the whole world smiles with you!"...and that puts a smile on my face!

Love and hugs to all of you!
God Bless!
Linda

WHAT A RELIEF: A Change of Pace, A Smile on My Face, A Song in My Heart!!

2009-03-28T05:43:00.000-07:00

It started this last Thusday at about noon...I was actually breathing again!!!

I'm talking about the deep kind of breathing you do when you are relaxed and content. Praise the Lord, my grades were in! What a marathon of all-nighters, grading 93 take home finals and then calculating their actual grades! You have to be a teacher to "get" how hard this is. But the good news is...IT'S OVER ...for this quarter!!! I found myself feeling lighter...and I don't mean because of the 4.2 pounds I've lost at Weight Watchers over the last three weeeks. My spirit was soaring, and I started to smile again!

Not only that, I went to one of my favorite stores...JOANN's...and bought ALL of the supplies for the Spring Communication Conference at SCC, which I am in charge of again! Another great relief! I knew the theme for the conference and would have that ready for the first day of school!
More smiling!

Yesterday, Friday, I spent most of the morning at SCC getting my classes ready for spring quarter. A long ways to go, since I'm teaching a new course on Gender Communication, but I am encouraged! :) Just having some time to breathe put a song in my heart! I even cranked up Aretha Franklin on my car's cd player, got out of the car, and danced with Boppa before heading down the road to SCC!

I'm even in the process of getting ready for Easter and I can hardly wait to pour my creativity into designing Easter baskets for family and friends!

I've desperately needed a change of pace, and I've been praying non-stop that God would give me "new eyes to see" and a "new heart" to feel His presence.

As it says in Ephesians 3:20...

"Now to Him who is able to do immeasurable more than all we ask or imagine, according to His power that is at work within us, to Him be the glory!"

So today I'm up early, having coffee, getting ready to clean my house, reading The Message, and being reminded that He is able! No matter how hard it gets... I'll keep breathing, keep smiling and remembering that God loves me!

I'm sending smiles, hugs, and prayers YOUR way!
God Bless! Love Linda

Dealing With Tiredness and Anxiety at the End of the Quarter: Live In THIS Moment

2009-03-21T05:56:00.000-07:00

When I arrived home yesterday (Friday) after grading non stop (yes, it is finals week) a small package was waiting for me. My friend Sharon sent me a wonderful little book called:
100 Ways To Keep Your Soul Alive: Living Deeply and Fully Every Day!

Just reading the title almost brought me to tears. Truth be told, this has been one heck of a winter quarter. Students and teachers alike are exhausted physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. I feel tossed and battered from every side, really an emotional roller coaster. There have been the highest of highs and some pretty tough lows. I have been praying constantly asking God to give me perspective , wisdom, strength, and the good sense to rely on Him!

My last class day with students was this Thursday, and I said goodbye to 93 amazing human beings. I am so attached to my students that this is a gut-wretching experience. I have their take home finals to grade and final grades to calculate. My classroom looks like a tornado hit it last week, and I need to prepare to teach a new course next quarter.

Also, Thursday afternoon my nine Washington State troopers (they were in my 8:30 class) came by in uniform and wanted to have a picture taken with me. They also presented me with "The Gold Medallion for the Washington State Patrol". What an honor! I can't imagine not seeing all of them in my 8:30 class.

My life is out of balance and that is not new for me (especially at the end of a quarter) and my soul feels weary. Somewhere in the 254th paper I graded I didn't make much time for prayer, church, or things that restore me. So being a bit depleted, and having another tough situation hit home, I felt pretty empty as I opened the small package from my friend.

The first chapter is entitled Live in THIS Moment. It says:

I was regretting the past and fearing the future. Suddenly God was speaking. "My name is
'I Am.'" I waited. God continued.

"When you live in the past with its mistakes and regrets, it is hard. I am not there. My name is not 'I was.'

"When you live in the future, with its problems and fears, I am not there. My name is not 'I will be.'

"When you live in this moment, it is not hard. I am here. My name is 'I Am.'

So yesterday, after eating lunch and taking a nap, I finished helping Holly with the two flower arrangements I was making for the STIX auction for Tim, Kris, and Anna. I felt a sense of peace. I prayed while I cut flowers and felt a little restored.

I got out my journal and wrote and wrote. I sat by the fire and drank warm tea. I focused on
all the blessings that surround my life.

I met a new consulting client at Lindamans and found I was smiling more and breathing more deeply. I said a small prayer, before I met with her, that God might help me to find the right words so I could be of help to her.

This morning I slept in until 5:00 (that's sleeping in for me:)) and I feel focused on THIS moment and God's healing presence. I'm headed to watch my precious granddaughter Emma swim laps this morning, pick up an espresso, and "keep my hand in the hand of the man who stilled the waters" as the song says.

It has been a wonderful, challenging, long, tough quarter, but that is behind me. Today I'm living in THIS moment!
God Bless!
Love Linda

THE VIEW FROM THE BOTTOM OF THE HILL: Supporting Schools in a Snow Storm!

2009-03-12T04:19:00.000-07:00

The weather in Spokane has been crazy cold. One minute the sun is out and it is 20 degrees. Another minute it looks like a blizzard.

The days leading up to the March 10th school levy votes found the weather to be very unpredictable.

Now let it be said that I live in the Spokane School District, I teach in the Community College district, I have family teaching in the Deer Park School District (son-in law Ryan Farrell), and my daughter Jessi and her husband Rog teaching in the Mead School District.

Let it also be said that I have been a teacher for 43 years and have CONTINUALLY experienced the insanity of putting the welfare of schools up to a vote in a levy procedure.
There is much talk about children being a priority, and yet we don't have secure funding for their education. One year, when I taught K-12, I went door-to-door to get people out to vote so we would have books to give the children in our classes. Frankly it makes me boiling mad.

However, the system is the system and my grandbabies attend the schools impacted by these levies so it was time to activate...no matter the weather.

March 9th I took my District 81 sign from our yard and in the snow went to the bottom of Ray Thor, a busy intersection. I literally jumped around waving my sign at 6am, grinning at voters to remind them to send in their ballots. Now you might think this is odd behavior. However this is one of my usual spots for waving signs to the electorate, be it a presidential campaign or school levy! However this time I was out there in a bit of a blizzard! :) No matter! At the end of the day I want it said that I VOTED and that I encouraged others to vote...aka. making announcents at my church at the end of the church service on Sunday!:) I also called voters I knew in Mead and Deer Park. "Hi! It's Linda...I'm sure you've voted but if you haven't"...that kind of a drill.

God bless my Nana and my Mom who taught me to be an ACTIVIST, not an "It's not my job!" kind of gal! :) Have I mentioned that my Mom, single-handedly, got a group of drug dealers out of the University District in Seattle, Washington and my Nana, who was an elementary teacher herself, took a group of teachers from Montana to Washington D.C. to protest the Vietnam War because that money was needed for education? I come from a long line of tough, proactive , "I have a voice" women!

I love this country, and I want to exercise the vote that many women fought hard to give me.
Those gutsy women took on the "you can't have a voice 'cuz you're a girl" establishment, and I'll be darned if I'll miss the chance to make my voice known!

So the view from the bottom of the hill on snowy Monday and freezing Tuesday felt pretty darn great when I saw, to my great relief, that all of the levies had passed. I even told one of the night crew at Safeway (I see him every morning at 5:15am as I get my espresso and head to school) how thrilled I was that the levies had passed. He told me he had voted against schools and he then had to listen to my entire lecture about property values, children should always come first lecture. Poor guy didn't know what hit him! :)

My Mom and Nana are smiling in Heaven to know I'm carrying on that legacy!

God Bless! I'm off to school...and the best job in the world! :)
Love Linda

LIFE LESSON at 62: Dear God- Please Help Me Find the BLESS in the Mess!

2009-03-01T04:52:00.000-08:00

Simply put...these are times of great personal growth for me. Not your average "Gee whiz I'm learning a few new things that are stretching me" kind of times, but the "Earthquake moving, hold on to your hat kind of times." These are "WAKE UP" moments of the greatest magnitude.

Here, in no particular order, are a few of my most recent (and often repeated) learnings:

LESSON #1: LIFE IS NOT A DRESS REHEARSAL !

There is NO do over. This is it! This glorious life I am given from God is at once magnificent and short. Very, very short! I remember a profound conversation I had with my Mom. She described the stage of life she was in as she watched her husband and friends die. She very softly said these words to me...."One day honey, it just happens. You start to lose them. But don't let it consume you. They would want you to REALLY live your life since they can't live theirs."

First, Erik Anderson. Then Pat Bartlett. I came home yesterday to see that my dear friend Pat Bartlett had died. On February 6th she was diagnosed with glioblastoma (a rare and aggressive brain cancer) and on February 25th she went home to the Lord.

Are you kidding me??

This healthy marathoner, Harley rider, scuba diver, Bible study leader, business owner who has framed almost every picture I have ever framed in the past 15 years, devoted wife, mother and grandma of 6...was GONE ...in a heartbeat. She wasn't even sick and then BOOM!

So today I am again reminded to love my life, no matter the stressors...love ALL of it... when it glorious, fun, exciting, fulfilling and love it just as much when it is messy, unpredicatable, unnerving, and challenging. This is NOT a dress rehearsal!

LESSON #2: LIVE AS IF YOU HAVE A FULL CUP !

You often hear the question, "Is your cup half empty or half full?" And the notion is that the optimists see their cup as half full, the pessimists see it as half empty.

My take on this? Who wants a half-full cup? Not me! Like Loretta LaRoche, a stress management consultant, I want to say "My cup runneth over!" I want to see all of that abundance slopping over from the brim of my cup!

Some time back Amy taught me the phrase.."Blessed Beyond Measure!" I love to say those words and how I FEEL after I say them. "My cup runneth over" comes straight from the Bible and the phrase ends with..."Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life and I shall dwell in the house of the Lord forever!" I feel such a sense of peace when this is my outlook.

Right now these are challenging times. It is easy to hear the media messages and align my view of life with the ups and downs of the economy, the roller coaster known as the stock market. My faith, on the other hand, tells me to see EVERYTHING as a gift, an opportunity to learn and rely on God. I want to approach everything in my life from an attitude of ABUNDANCE, not scarcity!

This hasn't been easy lately as I've sat in countless budget cut meetings filled with fear and dread, always concentrating on what will go, not what will stay. I feel at times like a lone voice when I say..."What I know for sure is that we will get through this. We have done this before. We do miracles EVERY day at SCC and money has never been the root of those miracles!"

I am resolved this morning to renew my efforts to live life as if I have a full cup.

LESSON #3: NOW...IS THE TIME FOR BEING IN BALANCE

This weekend I had a massage. The massage therapist, after digging deep for an hour to grind through the knots in my neck and back, kindly whispered..."Are you taking care of yourself?"

The answer, again, is "No, I'm not." The reasons for this dilemma are endless and hollow.

I want to relax more, smile more, spend more time with those I love who also love me! I want to have more FUN! I want to be more patient with others and have more compassion overflowing. I want to rely on God's love and goodness to sustain me, no matter what! I want to worry less and have less stress by turning it all over to Him.

Awhile back I planted indoor spring bulbs and gardening always sooths my soul. The feel of the dirt, the act of planting a bulb, the expectation of seeing a flower...makes me smile as I anticipate seeing new life! The bulbs are now transforming into a sea of flowers and this morning small daffodils and sweet smelling spring flowers greet me! My sunroom feels like spring!!

Take THAT you long, cold winter!

So this morning as I sit by the warmth of our fire reflecting on abundance, the shortness of life and living life as if I had a full cup...I remember my dear friends Erik Anderson and Pat Bartlett.
Here's to you both! Thank you for gracing my life with your presence. I'll always remember you and live my life to the fullest. That's what you would both want me to do! I AM blessed beyond measure!

God Bless!
Love Linda

A DAY TO REMEMBER: February 19th, 2009

2009-02-21T07:49:00.000-08:00

This morning I just can't stop crying. I opened the Spokesman Review and on the front page is a picture of the runners at SCC running in memory of their beloved coach, Erik Anderson. Erik was killed in a freak accident this last Thursday, February 19th. February 19th is also my Mom's birthday.

Erik Anderson was a kindred soul, a colleague of mine for 12 years. He was unassuming and had a smile that lit up all outdoors. He and I were on the same page when it came to encouraging students. As one student said, "He believed in me when I didn't believe in myself," Another said, and this was a young man I held while he cried on Thursday..."Erik was my father, my mother. What do I have left?" This young man escaped from the violence of war torn Sudan, making his way to Washington in 2000. He lived with a number of foster families and finally came to SCC. He was a raw talent and became Erik Anderson's special project.

Thursday, the 19th, when three hysterical former students found me and said that "Coach has been killed"...I literally raced to the Lair and was confronted by a scene out of a horror film, a nightmare . Police were everywhere, fire fighters and medics were around, the athletic department was holding watch in abject horror, students were pressed into fetal position balls sobbing.

How could this wonderful person, this phenominal teacher, this beloved coach be gone...in an instant? There were and are no words to express the loss.

What I will remember about Erik is his lack of arrogance, his genuine smile, his inclusive spirit, and the authentic kindness he displayed to everyone. I know lots of athletes who are judgemental and critical of those who are not in shape or don't make the right choices. Erik was quite the opposite. Where some might look at those who are overweight with distain and disgust, Erik sought to educate them (us) with a loving hand. He knew that people are more than sports, they are a combination of heart, mind and spirit. He was a dreammaker, not a dreambreaker. People felt loved in his presence.

I saw Erik a number of weeks ago. He called me quite unexpectedly to see if I could talk to him about one of his female athletes. One of the older coaches said that "Linda might have some help to offer" him. When he phoned he humbly asked if someone who was so busy helping everyone could take the time to meet with him. He didn't want to inconvenience me. He was confronting a very awkward situation with this student athlete and wanted to handle it properly. Normally, he said, when it came to running, he would know what to do. But this issue wasn't about running. He needed some help with communicating a tough message. Interestingly enough, I knew the student athlete....so we talked. I will always remember how grateful he was for my insights.

That was Erik in a nutshell. He always wanted to do the right thing.

February 19th has always held a special place in my heart. When I woke up this February 19th my first thoughts were about my Mom. I miss her every day. Her love and devotion shaped my life. She was my rock and my greatest supporter. She wanted to know who I really was, how I really felt. Erik Anderson was someone my Mom would have loved.

Things won't ever be quite the same at SCC. One of our finest is gone. He "got" what it meant to be a teacher and a coach. Those roles, along with being a husband and father, were sacred to him. I will think of him often and fondly. I will see his hard work in the eyes of his students and the dedication of those he coached.

His death reminds me of this quotation:

"Death is a challenge. It tells us not to waste time. It helps us to recognize how much we need each other and share how much we love each other."

God Bless!
Love Linda

Heart-To-Heart Talks- The Greatest Valentine's Gift

2009-02-15T06:34:00.000-08:00

February has been an amazing month! First...a birthday where I felt loved and celebrated and then following on the heels of my birthday, Valentines day! It has, however, also been a month of deep reflection, long talks, self awareness and some raw honesty! I am up for it ALL!

Bring it on!

Those of you who know me and love me know that I love "heart-to-heart" talks. These are the kinds of conversations where masks are peeled back, the phones are turned off, no one talks on a cell phone to someone else while I am there, and the focus is just on "us"...whoever "us" might be!

When the girls were growing up we had family meetings. Sometimes heart-to-heart talks happened there. More often than not they happened in one-to-one conversations, sometimes by a fire, sometimes on a porch huddled in quilts. They were affectionately (and not so affectionately) called "A Come To Jesus Meeting!"...which holds a certain ominous sound of...yikes this is a tell the truth moment..the whole truth and nothing but the truth.

While I savor this kind of honesty, truthfully I often enter these intimate moments with some fear and dread. What will I hear? How will I need to grow and change? What if this relationship isn't strong enough to withstand this truth telling moment?

Many of the heart-to-heart talks I've had in my 62 years have been initiated by me. Others have been initiated by the other person. In every case, "The Talk" was long overdue...it desperately needed to happen to restore life, honesty, vibrancy, clarity, integrity, and mutuality to the relationship. The air needed to be cleared, even though the cost might be the end of a relationship as I previously knew it.

In short, as I reached fifty I said more of what was the truth in my heart, no matter the cost. As I reached 60...my transparency and authenticity doubled! It seems that life is short and pretence sucks the life out of me.

Now please do not think that my self disclosure bleeds all over the place. I am not one to dump my feelings all over another person inappropriately. I also know (usually) when it is "smart" to keep my mouth shut.

I choose this JUST DON'T SAY IT option when:

*Nothing is gained by more honesty. I have put myself out there, and there is no positive return to keep doing so. I have built in radar for well-constructed facades, and I'm no longer very good at pretending that things are OK with some folks ..when in truth they are not. Some relationships can't be "fixed", even when you wish they could be. My radar knows when a person genuinely likes me and cares about me...or they don't. It's all about behavior, not just words. So when they really don't care, but pretend to care, I eventually shut down. It is just too painful to be the only one who cares in a relationship. We may both know it's
a done deal, but ettiquete says just move them out to a distant emotional ring and as John Lennon said.."Let it be!"

* I have apologized and have not been forgiven. For me, this shuts a door. It's a statement that the person is done with me. I make mistakes. I am flawed. But so are those people. I think forgiveness sets US free, even if it doesn't change what has happened. If they truly can't forgive me that is a signal that it is time to move on. I still love them, that doesn't change, but I distance myself from them and there is no point in trying to make the relationship closer.

*It is clear that I am not a priority to the other person. They only kinda, sorta put up with me out of obligation of some sort. Not my cup of tea!

I will make a run at making almost all relationships work better, but when my run hits roadblock after roadblock...common sense kicks in. Sometimes that takes me a long, long time to come to .
I never want to "give up" on anyone, and I don't want them to give up on me.

We took the Jay Hall Conflict Inventory in Graduate School, and I was off the charts in wanting to try and try again...even after a relationship had run its course. My faculty advisor asked me a thought provoking question: "Linda, why do you keep trying to revive something that is clearly OVER?" Great question.

So, in summary, I am letting go and letting God when it comes to some folks. I still love them, but I'm not going to try to improve a relationship that the other person really doesn't want to be in with me. There are too many others to focus on where mutuality, respect and love abound in great measure!! That's where I will put my energy! :)

I WILL have heart-to-heart talks all day long with :

*Those I love who also love me. These people are CONGRUENT. We have a problem? You are mad at me about something I did or said? Let's put it out on the table and talk it through!! There are often glorious results to those chats. Our mutuality requires a commitment from them and from me. This is NOT a one-sided relationship and I am not having to second guess what their remarks mean. They want honesty, but they also give honesty to me.

* Those who WANT to be in a relationship with me and are committed to our mutual growth!
In those relationships heart-to-heart talks bring clarity, new understandings, and a greater depth of self-awareness and other awareness! This sense of being a priority to them makes a difference. Am I a PS in their life? An after thought? Are they someone who gives as much to our relationship as they take?

My favorite Valentine's gift this year was a heart-to-heart talk with my beloved hubby Bert that began on Friday night, February 13th, (and I stayed up until MIDNIGHT because we were still talking). Some of you are reviving yourselves right now at the thought I stayed up that late. Since I am usually up at 3-4am every day, I tend to go to bed early. But NOT this night.

And we were still talking and trying to understand the next day! After 25 years of marriage, we are both STILL committed to personal growth and growing as a couple! This heart-to-heart talk was water to my thirsty soul!

It's Sunday morning, and my Valentine is now up, so it's time to set aside this post so Bert and I can talk again in person!

On that note..I send you love and a huge God Bless!

And by the way, if you read this post and say to yourself..You know what? I am overdue to have a heart-to-heart talk with Linda, I invite you to call me and open that door! I am waiting on the other side!

Love Linda

YES, IT'S TRUE...Today I'm 62!

2009-02-05T03:52:00.000-08:00

Ever since I was a little girl I have ALWAYS loved birthdays. In my photo albums growing up, lovingly constructed by my very own Mom, there are countless pictures of me at my own birthday parties in frilly, tafetta dresses decked out with a large bow in the back.

I always wear a huge grin on my face as well!

Birthdays in my family are not just a day in which to be celebrated, but also a chance to celebrate the people who bless our lives. So today thoughts of loved ones, here and gone, flash through my mind and heart! God has really blessed me by surrounding me with such wonderful soul mates for life...folks who love me and support me, real angels!

My Mom and dad were and are angels in my life! I was adored and cherished, the greatest gift you can ever give a child. Toni Morrison, an acclaimed, Pulitzer Prize winning author once said,

"Every time my children walk in the room I want them to see me "light up"! I want them to know that they hold the key to my heart!"

My parents "lit up" when I walked in the room! They gave me a gift of unconditional love that I have tried to pass on to everyone I meet! I held the key to their hearts.

My precious husband Bert is an angel in my life! When I met Bert my heart was broken. I felt like I might never find someone who could truly love me...for me. Just as I am, flaws and all.
Every day since I've known Bert...I have been loved like my parents loved me. I feel adored and cherished. What a gift to my soul.

And there are NO words that could ever express the gift God gave me when He blessed me with my precious daughters....Jessi and Amy! There are tears streaming down my face as I write this. They hold the key to MY heart! They are angels in my life! I light up inside when I think about them, talk about them, or see them. I remember THEIR birthdays so vividly. You two, and your wonderful families, are my best birthday present EVER!

And then there are my angel grandchildren...a "renewal gift" from God! Another chance to love and be loved. I adore them all and they are a gift to my heart!

And then there are my dear, dear friends...companions in life and truly a blessing from the Lord!
Their love and support makes my world a better place! I am so grateful to each of you for caring about me.

And then there are my students , old and new, whose lives have touched and blessed mine. They have come out of the woodwork lately to say "Thanks!" Nancy, Myia, Holly, Patty, Michael...thank you for your letters and phone calls. I heard from Nancy who was in my class when I FIRST started teaching! What an honor! You are angels in my life!

And to all the other angels...consulting clients, the folks at my church, the gals from my espresso spot who got me flowers yesterday...I am blessed to know you all!

And to my God who made me, one hand and all, who made me Linda, just as I am...I am grateful for your deep and daily love. May the way I lead my life...glorify YOU!

Yes, it's true. Today I turn 62! And I'm living EVERY day as if it was my last!

May God Bless you and keep YOU! May He make His face to shine upon YOU and give you peace!

Love Linda

Life Lessons As I Approach 62: Live Life With A Proactive Attitude!

2009-01-29T03:30:00.000-08:00

In these times that Warren Buffett (the richest person on earth and a savey investor and advisor to Barack Obama) calls "The Pearl Harbor of the economy", there is a sense of unrest and instability everywhere I turn.

There are countless meetings at the college about budget cuts, deep concerns about losing jobs, and a general malaise about when and how things will turn around. The floral person at Safeway is terrified about her cut in hours as is the person at Starbucks who made my espresso. They voice these fears in lieu of saying good morning. The temperatures in Spokane are cold, ice and snow still cover the ground, and many students wonder after all the work of college if there will be jobs to apply for. Things seem bleak and the media forecast calls for more of the same.

More than once in the past few weeks I've heard myself say outloud..."I'm so glad I know Jesus."

Now please don't imagine that this post is some form of a lecture about spiritual life. It isn't. I don't want to suggest that because God is in the center of my life that I am a pollyanna and don't react when I see the huge cuts in my teacher pension.

This post is about what keeps me going when things get tough and having a proactive attitude!

As my 62nd birthday approaches next week, I have made a "gratitude list"...things that I am truly grateful for...no matter how the stock market is doing. My knowing that God loves me is at the top of the list. Every day I feel a deep sense of well being because I'm not alone, and I am deeply loved, flawed as I am.

Also on my gratitude list is my "Proactive Attitude" about life. I inherited this sense of being personally empowered from both of my parents, especially my Dad. Being born with one hand, some parents might have pampered their daughter and only child. Some might have worried and focused on what I couldn't do, rather than what I could do. Not Mark McColm! He used to say "If it is to be...it is up to ME!" He role modeled being proactive at every turn, and he taught me to do the same.

To me living life with a "Proactive Attitude" means several things:

1)I spend time identifying and following through on long-range goals for myself.

2) I feel in charge of making things happen.

3)I feel responsible for my own life.

4) I am driven by a sense of pupose.

5) I am able to choose my own actions.

6)I work to focus my efforts on things that I can control rather than things I can't control.

7) I am driven by my personal values.

8)I believe with all my heart that there are abundant opportunities that await me so I expect great things.

These are all "mantras" I constantly heard from my parents along with one liners like "you can be anything you set out to be!"... "You can do anything anyone else can do if you work hard!" I heard these positive affirmations so many times that they seeped into my bone marrow!

My generation, the Baby Boomers, have never had to really cope with terribly difficult times. Unlike my parent's generation, many baby boomers have role modeled a life of self-indulgence and that having "things" will make someone happy. That never has worked, and it doesn't work now.

We never lived through life events like the great depression, WWI and WWII, and several enormous recessions. My parents did and doing without and having less made them work harder and appreciate what they had earned even more. They didn't expect things to be easy. They would have taken any job, or several jobs, to keep food on the table. Dolores and Mark, and so many others like them, felt responsible for their own lives. They went after life and never felt victimized by it. I never heard a "why me?" growing up. More often I would hear, "Why not me?"

I grew to believe that tough things happen, and you don't "cave" when they do. You aren't a victim and you have NO right to quit.

One of my favorite quotes says:

I am not helpless, I am not hopeless, and I have NO right to give up on myself!

So today I'll go off to SCC with a proactive attitude! I'll take the lessons of my amazing parents with me...wherever I go! I'll put on my favorite CD and let Ray Charles and Aretha Franklin's voices fill the air as my students come into room 239.
I'll remember that God loves me, and I'll let go and let God.

And when asked how I am, I'll say what I've said all week-
"Thanks for asking. I'm "Blessed Beyond Measure!" (a favorite quote I learned from my daughter Amy:))

And to all of you who read this...my prayer is that you too would know the lesson of my parents... that you can have a proactive attitude. It's a choice! There are abundant opportunities that await YOU! Expect great things!

God Bless! Love Linda

In Honor Of Dr. King - Solo by my precious grandaughter Emily!

2009-01-19T17:39:00.001-08:00

FRESH THINKING: "When Patterns Are Broken New Worlds Emerge!"

2009-01-17T06:48:00.000-08:00

Last night Bert and I had the kind of conversation that most people long for all of their lives.

It's the kind of heart-to-heart talk where you hear the intimate whispers of two married people who have spent their lives together and know each other to the core. As they rock away on the front porch, they hold hands and share the deepest secrets of their hearts. One says, "This is who I REALLY am, deep down, who I am afraid to show anyone." The other knowingly says, "I know. That's the YOU that I love!"

While we weren't in rocking chairs, we were by the fire in our living room, afghans covering us, telling the truth about who we are and how we see each other. That's my dream of a "perfect moment"...being truly seen and embraced, just as i am.

We talked about patterns in our lives, patterns we had learned from being very little. We looked at questions like:

*When you were little, what did you have to do to get attention?
*What happens inside you when you get withdrawn and quiet?
* How do you really feel when one of our children ignores you?
*When you look at me, what happens inside your heart?
*What are you most afraid of about getting old?
*Why has going to this little African American church put such a smile on your face?
*What pattern is going on in your life right now that you would most want to change?

In 2008 I started to read the book "Life Is A Verb". I contiunue to read it and refer to it in 2009. This profound book asks this question as a starting point for SEEING the patterns in my life:

*What does it take to fully inhabit your life?

Patty Digh says, "It takes realizing how important the "I" that is you is to the equation. This is not about other people, it's not about changing the world in big ways. it's not even about doing great things - rather, it's about doing small things that give you LIFE, bring you joy, help you inhabit the stories of your days-and by extension, help change the world and the lives of others around you."

To LIVE FULLY , you must be present in the biggest way possible!

Last night's conversation with my dear spouse and beloved life-partner was truly living life fully and having fresh thinking about breaking old patterns that hold both of us back. We both believe that when patterns are broken...new worlds emerge.

At the end of our heart-to-heart talk I again knew something very simple, yet profound:
I will never leave Bert and he will never leave me. It's just that simple.

So today I am on the look out for old patterns that hold me back from being all God means for me to be. I am using FRESH THINKING to breakthrough barriers that I've built to protect me.
I look forward to 2009, no matter what it brings, and I anticipate and expect great things!

God Bless!
Love Linda

PUT YOUR "BIG GIRL" PANTIES ON AND DEAL WITH IT!- A Water Feature In Our Living Room

2009-01-06T21:15:00.000-08:00

As I came home on Tuesday night, after my first day of teaching at SCC, I was AMAZED to find a "visit" from Mother Nature in our living room and master bedroom! Initially I looked at the dining room table and saw water on it. Hmmm...I thought, how odd. And then I looked up, and looked around, to see drips and small water falls coming through the recessed lighting fixtures. The bucket brigade began!

Long story short, we had a water backup that came from a drain filled with ice on the deck outside our master bedroom. While we had been shoveling the snow from the deck, once the warming took place and more snow came from the roof, the excess water went under the sliding glass door into the bedroom. The carpet was SOAKED and the water came down to the main floor.

So we had two problems to deal with. Getting the snow (and water) removed from the roof and deck, and dealing with he mess on the carpets (and potentially drywall and paint).

As I was placing large pots and pans everywhere my cell phone rang. It was Amy and I laughed as I told her that Bert wasn't home yet, but that I had a new "water feature" in our living room. I even put the cell phone up to the gushing (and I do mean gushing) water so she could hear the melodic sounds!:) Amy asked very graciously if we needed any help. Just as graciously I declined, not wanting to inconvenience anyone at that late hour (and not knowing how anyone could help). The phone rang about ten minutes later and Aim said "We're on our way!"

Meanwhile Bert came home, and I came to the door with a smile and chuckle saying..."Hi, Honey! Welcome home! Remember that "water feature" I have always wanted...well, we got it!" (Please see my previous post about creative problem solving to get the humor in this!)

Long story short, Ryan got on the roof (which is slanted, has tile on it, and is FOUR stories high...see the tiny figure in picture #1 at the top of the photo...that's him)) and started shoveling the remaining snow AWAY from the deck) and Bert started shoveling water off of the deck. I called a water removal service who had put in 36 straight hours with others having the same kinds of problems and could only come at 1:00 on Wednesday to look at the damage. We were grateful that they could come at all...so set up the appointment.

The water removal folks arrived on Wednesday afternoon, and we discovered that the owner had gone to our old church and taken a Sunday school class Bert and I had taught some years back. Reassuring! Larry and his crew took up the carpets, removed padding and put in GIANT fans to start the drying process. So the bed has moved and the master bedroom is now on the walkway on the second floor.

Sounds bleak, sounds stressful.???I guess you could choose that response. But amazingly I am very calm and not very stessed from all of it! I have put my "big girl" panties on and I'm dealing with it! In fact I'm laughing and calling it a "camping adventure".

Now those who know me well, REALLY well, may stand in true amazement at this attitude of "oh well, it's only water" coming from ME??? They may even think I've lost it or I'm just pretending to not be stressed. Yet no one is more amazed at this turn of attitude than I am!!I have not been known as a "laid-back" person about having disruption in my home. But that was then and this is now! New year and new attitude of gratitude!This "keep the little things little, and most things are little" attitude came from seeing a bumper sticker in Maui. It said:

"RELAX...this ain't the mainland!"

I laughed and chuckled about this bumper sticker and reframed it to say, "Relax, this ain't LA or New York!" And I've said it with laughter almost every day since our return from Maui!

So as the REALLY loud fans whir and we dry out through Sunday... as we assess the damage and deal with our insurance company... I feel well and blessed.

To quote a friend:

"I am too blessed to be stressed, too anointed to be disappointed! Winners make things happen. Losers let things happen." Yup, so true!

A special thanks to both Jessi and Amy who offered us a place to stay. We're grateful for your support. For now, we're doing great.

God loves us and all is well, no matter what! Have a blessed day!God Bless!Love Linda

CREATIVE PROBLEM SOLVING: What To Do When It Just Snows and Snows!!!

2009-01-06T03:28:00.001-08:00

I woke up early this morning to see if there had been another snowstorm or if we were REALLY going to start school and the beginning of winter quarter! After doing my exercises and 25 situps and stretches, I got my delicious cup of coffee(a blend we brought back from Hawaii), sat by the fire, and since it was just 3:45 am decided to check a few blogs.

I went to my daughter Jessi's blog about creative problem solving when you have lots of snow, and I couldn't stop laughing!! What a GREAT reminder about making lemonade out of lemons and how to reframe situations you can't control in a positive manner!
As my Dad used to say to me...."Honey, when the going gets tough, the tough get going!"

Part of my genetic heritage is to tackle things in a positive manner, and Jessi's post was a great reminder for me as I start 2009! (so thanks Jess Jess!)

Now some folks may not want to hear these suggestions from someone who just came back from sunny Hawaii. They may even be cynical enough to say..."well, easy for you to say Linda as you have been in tank tops and flip flops for two weeks." Yes, that's true enough. But I think the lesson of doing creative problem solving is a "Life Lesson", not just a lesson about snow.:)

So here are a few of the ways the Salisbury's are using creative problem solving at our house,and in our lives, when it just snows and snows:

*Note: As I said in my post on Jessi's blog, please get a visual picture of solution #1...and no, I am not exaggerating this. Feel free to stop by and observe for yourself :)

1) PROBLEM: When you have a long and narrow driveway that winds DOWN to your carport, and because of all the snow you now have a snow tunnel that extends the last part of the driveway to where you park your cars, your visibility for driving (and not getting stuck) gets limited.

SOLUTION: Do as my dear hubby did yesterday- Take your homemade Barak Obama campaign signs and your garden rakes and tools and plant them along the top ridge of the tunnel to mark your way! No, I am not kidding or making this up! It makes me laugh just to think about it! You have to know and love Bert to know how real this is!

2) PROBLEM: Everyone is talking about and focused on snow to the exclusion of more interesting topics.

SOLUTION: Write down the story of the winter of 2008-09 and take pictures! When you get to be my age you'll have a non-boring story to tell your grandchildren!

3) PROBLEM: You feel stuck inside and feel house-bound!

SOLUTION: Aren't we always saying..."If I only had time, I'd clean up this or that?"
Now we DO have time when we are inside more! We've also been getting out some favorite dvd movies and watching them!

4) PROBLEM: I want to be outside so I can get some exercise

SOLUTION: You burn off 500+ calories per hour shoveling snow!!!

5) PROBLEM: You are feeling kind of down and negative.

SOLUTION: Go shovel someone else's sidewalk or driveway. You'll feel better in minutes! Or another solution is to read the amazing book "Christmas on Jane Street!" by Billy Romp (a true story). What a great attitude adjuster (I got this for Christmas from my dear friend Sharon Hartnett and just finished it yesterday) WOW! What a thought-provoking and inspirational read!

6) PROBLEM: You are teacher and need a creative way to re-engage your students at the start of a new quarter

SOLUTION: Give them this exercise to do the first day of class and have them work with other new students on creative problem solving. Give extra credit for "snow photos"!!:)
Am I on a roll or what!! :):)

Well it's time to get going and get ready to roll...out the driveway, my path marked and my car facing forward in the carport so I'll have momentum (thanks to my sweetie!)

Have fun in the snow today and feel free to send me any "creative problem solving" ideas you have with all this snow! I'll share them in my class!!

God Bless and keep shoveling!
Love Linda

ALOHA and MAHALO...to my Mom and Dad!

2009-01-03T18:39:00.000-08:00

One of my goals, while in Hawaii, was to have some closure with my Dad's death over there. Neither of my parents wanted a memorial service after their deaths, so I followed their wishes. However, there was unfinished business for me.

I didn't visit the Royal Mauian, where my parents lived during their time on Maui, until the last day of our trip. I asked Amy to come to take some pictures. I wanted to keep it simple.

We went to the beach where we had spent so much time, found a large slab that looked over the ocean, had some prayer time, and sent two leis out into the ocean. I stood and watched them swirl in the surf (they stayed together) and felt a HUGE sense of gratitude for the parents I had who had loved me so well. They were not perfect parents, there aren't any, but I knew I was deeply loved and adored. They had my back! Many of the values that shape my life today came from Nana Dee and Grandpa Mark!

As we left that spot I felt a great sense of closure. My heart felt peaceful!

So Mom and Dad...here's to you! As 2009 starts, once again I am grateful, so grateful, that YOU were both my parents. Aloha (hello and goodbye) and Mahalo (thank you) for all you were and are to me!

God Bless you both and may God Bless all who read this!
More soon!
Love Linda

2008-12-28T21:15:00.000-08:00

Aloha! We're feeling really blessed and sending you loves and hugs!

God Bless, Linda

Merry Christmas!

2008-12-25T15:59:00.000-08:00

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!

WHITE SHOES, FOUR FEET OF SNOW, CHRISTMAS CELEBRATIONS and A TRIP TO MAUI!

2008-12-19T04:23:00.001-08:00

It is December 19th and we have more snow on our deck than my Spokane memory can ever recall. Winter is here in full force, God has created a winter wonderland, and there WILL be a white Christmas in Spokane this year! All cause for celebration! With several "snow days" in a row, and school cancelled, vacation has started for so much of my family.

I LOVE Christmas... I love everything about it. But we won't be in Spokane for Christmas this year, and I have mixed feelings about that since I will miss traditions created over years and years. I'm not complaining, however, since Bert and I are headed to Maui, Hawaii!

Why now? Why go? Why miss out on four feet of snow?

As much as a part of my heart wants to be here, we planned this trip a year ago for a number of important reasons. Here are just a few:

* Bert and I are coming up on our 25th wedding anniversary! It's hard to believe, but 25 years!
Those years have been amazing, and I am grateful for every one of them! We have shared raising two daughters, our careers, our spiritual lives, our friends and a HUGE emphasis on family. On occasion, Bert and I have taken "couples only" trips together (several fabulous and relationship-growing cruises years ago) and those renewed and regenerated our marriage. Truth be told however, for much of those 25 years Bert has taken a back seat to what I think the kids need, what the grandkids need, and what I need. He has done so with a willing heart and because he knows how much I love my girls, my grandchildren, my jobs and my friends. But what I know for sure is that it is HIS turn to have my undivided attention. If we are in Spokane, that won't happen at Christmas. So we are going to the land of sun and FUN for some well-earned and precious couple's time!

* My parents bought a condo in Maui and lived there about 7 months of the year during their retirement. Some of my fondest family memories at Christmas time are going with Jessi and Amy to visit Nana and Grandpa Mark in Maui. Whenever we would arrive at the condo, number 414 at the Royal Mauian Resort, my Dad's white shoes would be by the door. My parents worked very hard all of their lives, but they were frugal at heart having lived through the depresion. My dad took impeccable care of those shoes. He put white show polish on them about every week. They symbolized, to me, who my Dad was and many of his values. Seeing those sparkling, white shoes outside the door of #414 was my official welcome to Maui!

Those shoes are now on a shoe shelf in my upstairs closet, and I see them every day.

My Dad died in Maui in 1991, and while I came back to Maui, one of my all-time favorite spots in the world, to have time with my Mom...I never had closure with my Dad's death over there. So...I am going back to Maui to give my heart peace and to have put Hawaiian leis in the ocean for both my Mom and Dad. I miss them every day.

* Some time back, Amy and Ryan started to talk about going to Hawaii and asked if we might like to go along. They planned to go after Christmas. Their kind invitation got us thinking that we could have time alone if we went early and then time with part of our beloved family. Their desire to include us was an invitation we couldn't resist! So that invitation was really the starting point for planning this trip.

As we leave tomorrow we will miss our Christmas morning time with Rog, Jessi, and Emma. We always cherish having Christmas breakfast with them each year and bringing Nana's special breakfast treat to the celebration. We will miss family time with Amy and family on Christmas day. We will miss seeing our friends and extended family at Christmas events and celebrations. And we will miss being at our very special church to celebrate the birth of Jesus.

But the white shoes call me to Maui...and we'll be thinking and loving all of you...and sending a..Melei Kalliki Maka..or Merry Christmas (Hawaiian style) your way.

Thank you for all of your love and support. You mean the world to us!

May God Bless you and keep you. May He make His face to shine upon you and give you peace. And may you know in your deepest heart-of-hearts how much He loves you!

I do too! Merry Christmas!
Linda

A GOLD MEDALLION MOMENT... I Am Truly Stunned!

2008-12-13T03:26:00.000-08:00

I have been here before. In fact I have been here before... many times over. It's the end of the quarter, and 91 dearly-loved students are moving on. Granted, some will be back next quarter, yet the unique and magical combination of students that makes up a class has disbanded. As always... I am almost rendered speechless.

This week I have been up at 1am almost every morning just grading and grading and grading. Their final projects have been superb showing both critical thinking and deep feeling. Their learnings bring tears to my eyes! Their take home finals, now completed, are a testimony to the profound changes that have taken place. I'm the facilitator and cheerleader...they do this courageous, college-level work.

Many students started the quarter not believing that they were capable. Most are leaving knowing that with showing up and doing the hard work that they can achieve their most treasured dreams!
They all have gifts, they just have to find them and then use them.

I am so honored to be a teacher, to be THEIR teacher! They will always be my students.
I am thrilled that this marathon, this Ironwoman-type event that we call "the end of the quarter" is almost over. The grades are in. Now I have to clean my room and get ready for next quarter.

In the midst of all of this chaos I started my every two year tenured-professor performance review with my new dean. I told her that I was born to do this. She agreed with me. God made me with a teacher's heart beating in me. I knew when I was in first grade that I wanted to be a teacher. Not for one moment in all these years have I doubted that this was the honored job I was created to do. I wasn't meant to just give students material to learn, I was there to also love them and believe in them. I'm their academic "advocate"!

Not only was this week about students leaving and meeting with my dean...something else happened that has left me stunned and amazed! A magic moment took place for me.

On Monday, right before my 8:30 class was about to start, I looked up to see Gary Johns, head of the Criminal Justice Program, standing at my door. Gary, being a police officer and teacher, looked solemn. However, he always looks solemn. So I went out in the hall to say "Hi!"...wondering what he had in mind and why he was there. This year, as always, I've had lots of law enforcement students, so I imagined he wanted to talk about one of them.

Oddly, Gary just kept looking at me...a bit awkward I might add. He then said, "I would like to shake your hand!" Ok, I'm thinking.. I have to start class and you pick this moment to shake my hand? However, Gary is my buddy and I love his students... so with a grin on my face I extended my hand into his. At that moment I felt a round-shaped object go into my hand. As I pulled my hand back I saw a gold medallion. Gary said, "This is what we give our top student in Criminal Justice. On the outside of the medallion it lists qualities we want our students to have...courage, commitment, integrity and honor."

He went on to say,"The Criminal Justice students and faculty voted who should get this medallion for 2008 and we voted for you to get it. You, Linda, embody all of these qualities and show them every day to our students." I was stunned then and now. Tears flowed. This "Gold Medallion Moment" that took place as I was about to say goodbye to my students...felt like it was God's way of saying to me..."Keep doing this! It matters!"

While I am bone-weary and beyond exhausted, I wouldn't trade my job as a teacher for anything, not anything!

So as fall quarter 2008 comes to a close, I am relieved and at the same time my heart is broken as I miss my students already. The gold medallion sits on the table by my coffee cup as a reminder of an amazing time in my life! I will treasure it forever!

Thanks for listening!

God Bless!
Love Linda

SQUEEZE IN NEXT TO SOMEONE, Arm-To-Arm

2008-12-03T03:49:00.000-08:00

Some weeks life's learnings cascade down on me as if I was sitting under a waterfall, almost drowning. Since it is the end of the quarter there is little time to stop, pause, and take it all in. No doubt I'll sort them out one-by-one during Christmas vacation. Yet for now it is enough to know that they are coming for a reason....to teach me to be a better person, a more compassionate human being.

Not long ago Scott Finnie visited my Intercultural Communication class. We were talking about the impact of our ethnicity, the color of our skin, on how others perceive us and judge us. Scott blessed us by telling his "story." As always I was brought to tears. How is it, I wondered out loud, that this amazingly kind person, this valedictorian, student body president, and gifted athlete had to endure such hatred, simply because his skin is black and his hair curls differently than mine.? And how, after so much unwarranted hatred was flung his way, is he now the most compassionate person I know?

Scott talked about "DIGNA", the Latin root of the word dignity. He defined dignity as the God-given right that each human has to be treated with kindness and respect. They are, after all...ALL of them, God's children and therefore worthy. He said these words with such conviction that I saw tears in the eyes of my basketball players. I saw tears in the eyes of my hippie student, a young man with green hair who often wears a skirt to class. WE are all in the same room and we all co-exist and give each other "digna".

I can't seem to stop crying this morning because as I look at my own life these past few months I feel as if God is tugging on my heart to step out and show more "digna", more respect, more compassion ...to EVERYONE! And I do mean everyone! Those that I do not know who hold signs on the street asking for help, those that I pass in the halls at SCC everyday, those in my family who feel distant and separated from me, those in my life where there are unresolved hurts and issues, often from long ago...and i don't know how to "fix" any of the hurts. There is a small "i" in that sentence because "i" feel about that small in the midst of all the hurt and sorrow in the world, and some of it is at my very doorstep.

One of my favorite quotes from Mother Teresa says:

We think sometimes that poverty is only being hungry, naked, homeless. The poverty of being unwanted, unloved, uncared for is the greatest poverty. We must start in our own homes to remedy this kind of poverty.

As Anne Lamott says, "Help God! Open my heart!"

I am reading the book.. Life is a Verb-37 Days to Wake Up, Be Mindful, and Live Intentionally.
I cry every time I read a story in this book that is changing my life. This morning I read the story "Squeeze In Next To Someone, Arm-To- Arm".

In a nutshell, it's the story of author Marion Woodman, who asks the question..."How are we changing the people around us by how we respond to them, or don't?" How do we hold "presence" for others? How do we hold love for others, with no agenda? Who, as we were growing up, really saw us and heard us, without asking us to perform up to their standards? Who loved us and asked nothing in return?

During a stay in India, many years ago, Marion saw these questions acted out in real life. She was very, very ill with dysentery and captive in her hotel room for several weeks. She could feel her life-blood draining with this illness. Finally, desperate to escape her room, she gingerly made her way to the lobby of the hotel and sat on a sofa, where she tried to write her husband a letter.

Although there were other seats available, a very large brown woman came and sat down right next to Marion, with their arms touching. She invaded Marion's space. Marion moved over, so did the woman. The pattern happened again and again. Marion was too ill to move to another sofa so she finally gave up and let the woman be right next to her, arm-to-arm.

This same pattern happened, much to Marion's amazement, day after day. Finally Marion relaxed, stopped moving away, and realized what a nice, warm big arm the woman had. They had no common language so they sat in silence. Marion said that her soul was touched, not just her body, by this woman's kind presence. Marion's health began to improve.

This couch dance continued for a week until one day a man appeared as the two women finished their silent, warm-armed vigil. He said to Marion, "You are all right now. My wife won't come back tomorrow." Marion asked him, "Why is she here in the first place?"

Marion was unprepared for his quiet, simple answer. "I saw you were dying and sent her to sit with you. I knew the warmth of her body would bring you back to life."

It took a moment for the magnitude of his message and the enormity of what these two strangers had done for her to sink in.

Suddenly Marion knew that the woman HAD saved her life by taking the time just to be with her. And just as important, Marion had been willing to receive her kindness.

That is what it means to hold presence for others. That is what "digna" is all about.

So I ask myself, through all of my tears, who today does God want me to "hold presence for"? How do I share this profound lesson with my beloved students? How much more kindness would there be in the world if we could just do this for one person each day...just be there for them and hold them in a loving, arm-to-arm presence?

Albert Schweitzer said:
"In everyone's life, at some time, our inner fire goes out. It is then burst into flames by an encounter with another human being. We should all be thankful for those people who rekindle the inner spirit."

Thank you Scott Finnie for teaching me about "digna" and thank you Marion Woodman for sharing your story about the gift to your life when a beautiful large brown woman squeezed in next to you and arm-to-arm brought you back to life!

God Bless!
Love Linda

LOOKING AT LIFE: A REVIEW OF THE RECENT HIGHS and LOWS

2008-11-22T18:19:00.001-08:00

When I look at the calendar I am stunned. How in the heck can it be November 22nd?? This fall has flown by, and as I take a breath today... I look back and look ahead!

I love it when Jessi does the "High-Low" game with her students. It's an opportunity to get a concise view of what is really going on in their lives. It's self-disclosure that seems pretty non-threatening. I've "borrowed" her great teaching tool, and use it often in my classroom and consulting.

Today I'll alternate some of the recent "highs and lows" for me during this fall:

HIGH:
Every time I see my precious grandchildren I feel like it is the best moment of my life! I adore them, and they warm my heart. I loved taking Emma to the opening night of High School Musical 3 and having her stay overnight! I've loved time with Jacob and his recent overnight visit! Watching him play basketball with Boppa is such a treat! And then of course there is the precious Bitsy...aka Jenna Farrell...aka cutest toddler on the planet! Oh my gosh, she has stolen our hearts! Everything she does is the cutest thing I've ever seen. Seeing Zac and Kayla, and my other grandchildren, as they grow up so beautifully is amazing too!

I feel so, so blessed to be a Nana and to have my grandbabies close at hand!

LOW:
Just the thought of one of my beloved daughters being hurt or ill brings me to tears. To have one of them have a serious accident put my heart in my throat and stopped me from breathing fully for several weeks. Jessi had a serious cycling accident. When cycling with some of herTri Fusion teammates, and going down a hill really, really fast....think 30 plus mph, she hit a deer (or the deer hit her). In any case, I received a call that she was in an ambulance headed to the trauma unit at Sacred Heart Hospital. She is doing much better physically, but struggling with short term memory loss and the kind of spins you get after a serious concussion.

It's hard to explain, but my Mommy heart, the heart moms ALWAYS have for their children, has been somehow on-hold and barely beating for the past few weeks. I have felt like I was in a bit of a fog. Yes, I was going to both of my full time, wonderful jobs...but a part of me was worrying about Jessi all the time, even in my dreams. A part of me was conscious of her all day long.

Both of my precious girls have had some very tough moments in their lives, some emotional heart ache. But seeing Jess Jess in that hospital, and knowing that I'd trade places with her in an instant if I could, made me realize that no matter how old or capable your adult children are...they are ALWAYS your babies...in your heart!

HIGH:
I always get to the college at the crack of dawn, and I'm usually the first one in the building, besides the janitors. I use that early morning time to prepare for my classes and grade papers. Recently, when I was in my classroom grading, listening to James Taylor's latest CD, and sipping my Starbucks...a former student walked through my classroom door. He was someone I had last spring who is now in the Physical Therapy Assistant Program at Spokane Falls. He grinned and said, "I knew I'd find you here at this hour!" He stopped by just to say "Thanks!" and that the interpersonal communication class he took from me "Saved my life!" He told me how he used the skills every day and what a huge difference it made. He gave me a quick hug and off he went so he'd be on time to his 8:30m class at the Falls. After he left I started to cry...I felt so blessed to see him and hear that he was using his new skills. I was touched to tears that he cared enough to go out of his way to let me know...what a definite "high"!!

LOW:
My schedule has been too jam packed all fall. I've joked at school that I needed roller skates just to get to all the meetings that are going on. Like so many other organizations and businesses, we are making HUGE budget cuts, many of which will hit hard, especially in 2009. There is an air of deep sadness at the college, especially among the folks whose jobs are on the line. I have no idea where we can take all of this money from since we are already on a shoe string budget. My goal is to do what is best for students ....so we preserve the classes and programs they need. Truly though it's sad to have worked so hard for years and years and see much of that hard work about to be cut.

And I'll end this post with a HIGH:
Thanksgiving is right around the corner and I am so grateful to God for my life and the people I love with all of my heart! I am grateful beyond words for my hubby Bert. I am so, so grateful for my precious daughters Jessi and Amy and their special families. I'm grateful for work I love that sustains my soul! I am grateful for so many friends whose caring for me warms my heart. I am grateful for all of my amazing and courageous students who inspire me to teach! I am grateful for my health! I am grateful for my church and all of the folks there who have reached out to love Bert and me. And most of all...I am so grateful that God loves me, just as a I am!

So today I am sending you a warm hug as well! Thanks for reading this blog and making a comment! You are a blessing to me, and I am grateful for YOU!
God Bless!
Love Linda

Read At Your Own Risk: God Says "Yes" To Me!

2008-11-07T04:05:00.000-08:00

Anne Lamott is one of my favorite authors. Her irreverent and eccentric look at life is like being in a Chinese antique store...when you read her it's like finding small, unique and thoroughly divine treasures in unexpected places!

Anne's view of "God" is outside of the mainstream view. She talks to God...while in her car, going to the bathroom..and her language with God is much like talking to her best girlfriend. Reading Anne is refreshing to my soul! It's almost like God saying to me..."It's OK Linda! You are a Christiam, even though your faith may not be exactly like anyone else's...

Recently I've been reading "Life Is A Verb" by Patty Digh. Perfect timing since my life FEELS upside down right now. I am at once ecstatic that Barack Obama is President, and in the next minute I feel a great sadness and worry about my family, my students, and those I love!

What I know for sure is that it is OK to be wherever I am! That is a life long lesson, well learned!
Don't pretend! Don't pretend you are OK, when you are not! Don't pretend you are "fine" if you are not! Don't pretend you aren't angry, when you have steam coming out your ears!

So...this is a DON'T PRETEND blog entry!

I learned about "pretending" in my family-of-origin. Pretend that Dad doesn't drink too much. Pretend that your marriage is OK, when it is far from OK. Pretend that you are happy, when you really are sad. The days I have pretended feel like days that are lost to me. The days when I am authentic and congruent, and tell my own truth, feel like days well lived!

I've have also learned that not everyone wants to hear what is really going on inside of me and outside of me. So I pick carefully where I share my deepest truths. I save those moments for those I hold most dear, those I trust with my heart. I am selective about my deepest self-disclosures! I don't share it all publically. Certainly not in a blog.

But on some days, when I feel weighed down by the enormity of personal growth I'm experiencing, I put some, just a few, of the learnings down to record the journey.

Lately, in Anne Lamott fashion, I have been talking to God non-stop! I talk to God in my car, in my heart, in my head...and I have been asking some tough questions. I know that God loves me! That is never in doubt. How God wants to use me, and how to be with certain people I am angry at, is always in doubt.

My conversation with God goes something like this..."OK God, how could he do this to her???That is so, so mean! She is so wonderful and this breaks her heart. Doesn't he see what he is doing? Can't you do something God to change his heart??? Could you please do that now..or soon.. OK... could you please do it while I am still alive to see it?? OK, I guess i don't get to dictate the timing? OK..I know I can trust you and put this in Your hands!"

While reading the book "Life Is A Verb", and going through the daily exercises, I ran into this poem called "God Says Yes to Me." As I read it aloud I started to cry and then bawl. I was OK with calling God "she", especially since I miss my Mom so much. I needed God's warm and nurturing touch on my heart.

Here's that poem:

I asked God if it was okay to be melodramatic
and she said yes
I asked her if it was okay to be short
and she said it sure is
I asked her if I could wear nail polish
and she said honey
she calls me that sometimes
you can do exactly
what you want to
Thanks God I said
And is it even okay if I don't paragraph
my letters
Sweetcakes God said
who knows where she picked that up
what I'm telling you is
Yes Yes Yes

I miss being called honey or sweetcakes. I miss summer and times that felt carefree. I miss viewing life through rose-colored glasses, when I could trust the people who took care of people's pension funds and not constantly worry about the people in my church not having jobs and enough to eat.

OK God..I know I can't fix it all, but I believe You can!

So I begin today knowing that God loves me and says "YES!" to me. It is time for me to say "YES!" to every aspect of my life, no matter how hard it is! As Natalie Goldberg says:

Our task is to say a holy yes to the real things of our life!

OK Natalie...OK God....I'll give that a shot today!

Thanks for listening!
God Bless!
Love Linda

PLAIN AND SIMPLE: I LOVE THIS COUNTRY!!

2008-11-04T04:57:00.000-08:00

I chose to write this post before the media blitz regarding this election hits the fan. I chose to write this post while I sit by the fire, sip my cup of coffee, and reflect on this election day, November 4th, 2008.

What comes up as the song in my heart is that...plain and simple... I love this country I live in, the United States of America!

While this country is far from "perfect," there are SO many things I am grateful for about the good old USA!!Here are a few of the things that I love:

* I love that we get to vote! I lived for some time in El Salvador...and fair voting just doesn't happen there!

* I love that we have free speech! As often as someone may not say what I like to hear, I love that in this country they have the right to say most things!

* I love that people have the courage to run for public office! As I woke up at 2am, I wondered if John McCain and Barack Obama had slept at all. What brave and courageous Americans that they were willing to run for public office!

* I love that I come from a military family, people who devoted years of their lives to helping this country to be free! My Dad served in WWII (and was away from his new bride for three years), and my husband Bert was a paratrooper in the Army!

* I love that MILLIONS of Americans will come out to vote today: black and white, brown and tan, Republicans, Democrats, Constitutionalists, Libertarians... the list is endless, Christians, Jews, Muslims, Buddhists, Hindus, straights and gays, rich and poor...the melting pot of this nation I love will have its say today!

* I love that tonight millions and millions of people will be glued to their tv sets waiting in anticipation for who will be the next leader of our country!

* I love that when we have a new President, no matter who is elected, we will work on reconciliation and uniting our country again, as we do after every election!

When my parents were alive, they ALWAYS had an election eve party. While they were staunch Republicans, they invited all their friends to come and watch the results. I heard differences expressed respectfully and lots of laughter and good natured ribbing! They all dressed up, drank champagne, and toasted the new President, no matter who he was!

On days like this, as every day, I miss my parents more than words can ever express! They would have loved this election!

So today, and everyday, I LOVE this country. While I want to see lots of changes, I am so grateful that I live here. This morning Bert and I sang "God Bless America"...as we sat in our chairs sipping coffee! Tears rolled down our cheeks as we sang those words! They came straight from our hearts!

God Bless America, and may God Bless YOU!
Love Linda

PRAYERS FOR JESSI!

2008-10-28T03:25:00.000-07:00

Sunday started out like any other day...well, sort of...

Bert and I live in a prime location on the south hill where thousands of cars go by daily (the Ray/ Thor corridor). Our town house overlooks the city and our view is that the traffic is just part of urban life. But because we are so visible to so many, we began to make HUGE Obama signs to put on our property. They are average size campaign signs, except that there is only one letter per sign. So, 5 signs spell out OBAMA. Smaller signs say...Obama 08 and Obama, Yes We can!!

We painted the background of each sign either bright red or blue and I cut out huge white foam core letters. We got patriotic balloons and set up the signs. We held the smaller ones and waved to the people going by. It was sunny, we had lots of laughs and some solemn moments at the reactions of those passing by.. some honking, some thumbs up, some thumbs down, some horrible comments, and some fingers pointed in an ill mannered form. The racist comments (by only a few) were the hardest to hear and see, as were the snubs from people going to a near-by church.

To counteract the negativity...I went back inside and made a new sign which said.."GOD BLESS YOU...no matter who you are voting for!"

I knew that feelings run strong in this election and that the reaction might be mixed, but I was pleased to do what I could for our candidate.

Since I had other errands to run, I brought the signs in (we were told by a friend they would be gone in a flash)...and headed to the store. Bert went to church, and I was about to settle down with coffee to get caught up on grading.

While in the car and headed home, I noticed a voicemail message. The voice wasn't familiar. He said he was Steve, Jessi's friend from TriFusion (her triathlon club) and that he didn't want to alarm me, but that Jessi was in an ambulance headed to the trauma unit at Sacred Heart Hospital after a cycling accident. While cycling at about 25 mph with her TriFusion friends, a deer veered out in front of Jessi and she hit it or swerved to avoid it, the details were unclear.

My Mommy heart stopped beating as I heard this message. I felt like I couldn't breathe. Truth be told, I still, feel that way.

I raced to Sacred Heart, praying aloud in the car, to trauma room 3. There was Jessi in a neck brace with huge abrasions down her back and they were checking to see if she could move her limbs. Thank God she could. Her TriFusion buddies from the cycling event were there, as was her Dad, Tim. Rog was in Arizona where he had been doing a triathlon race and people were trying to reach him.

I'll let Jessi tell the trauma room story when she is able (complete with pictures). There were some funny TriFusion antics that kept her laughing. While I was grateful for the levity, my heart was in my throat.

On the up side, Jessi's CT scans showed no broken bones or huge skull injury. On the down side she sustained a serious concussion from hitting her head as she flew off of her bike. Can you say...thank God she was wearing a helmet, which cracked in the process...

She is very, very, VERY sore and it will be awhile until we know the full extent of her injuries. But she is one tough cookie and in time will get there.

As Tim (her Dad), Amy (her sister) and I sat alone with her and held her hands and stroked her hair I was so grateful that our family (the old family unit we once were)was together and supporting each other. We are all totally comfortable being together and we all still love each other...and post-divorce that is a HUGE blessing. Tim and I have new families now, but our "old" family unit can still rally when needed!!

Today I am missing school to go be with Jessi. She needs to have someone to prepare meals and help with doses of medication. Amy was there yesterday with Jenna and today I'll be there in the am and Tiffany will be there in the afternoon. Just being there with her will be a blessing.
It brings back memories of when she was sick or hurt when she was little and I made her chicken soup, sang to her, and held her hand.

Life can change in a moment. Please put my precious daughter Jessi in your prayers for a full recovery. I am SO grateful to God that she is still alive!
God Bless!
Love Linda

LET'S HEAR IT FOR..."High School Musical 3"!!!

2008-10-25T07:16:00.000-07:00

A quote From Emma about High School Musical 3!:

"Hi! I'm Emma! and I went to High School Musical 3 with my Grandma. It was very fun. We went to Nordstoms for dinner and I had Mac and Chesse. We also had ice cream at the movie. I stayed overnight with my Grandma which was fun! I keep tickling her...It was silly. We have laughed all morning! It was funny. She calls me Babushka because my hair is all over. We laugh some more! and we laughed some more!!...all morning! At the movie theater I got a little dalmatian puppy names Dao. Love Emma"

When I saw the adverstisement on television that "High School Musical 3" was coming and that you might want to get your tickets early...I could smell an adventure in the air. My precious granddaughter Emma has loved the other two movie productions so I wanted to plan a "Nana and Emma Adventure!"

I invited Emma to go and then to have an overnight with us as well. She was ecstatic about the idea and bubbled over with enthusiasm in her cell phone call to me.
Amy helped me get the tickets online (thanks Aim!) and Boppa and I picked up the tickets early on Friday.

I picked Emma up after work, did some fun hanging out at Fred Meyer where we got Dao a dalmatian puppy, and then headed downtown for dinner at Nordies! Emma has impecable manners and is SO fun to do things with. Then it was almost time for the movie to start so we had fun making cell phone calls to family to let them know where we were and what we were doing!! We got our movie treats and then settled in for some amazing singing and dancing!!!

We loved this movie, but even more we loved our time together. After the movie Emma wanted to have a slumber party in our living room so she camped out on the sofa. Since she wanted me close, I was on the upholstered ottoman (formerly a coffee table) next to her. Wish we had a picture of that one.! :) We watched another Barbie movie before drifting off to sleep.

The bottom line of this story is the total JOY it is for me to just be with my grandchildren! Doing the simplest thing makes me smile. Emma is a pistol, a bright light, and a mini-me of what her Momma Jessi was like as a little girl. I smile and chuckle when I am with Emma partly because it reminds me of all the fun I had with Jess Jess!

When someone asks me what my weekend was like, I may just break out in song and start dancing!! I wouldn't have missed this adventure with Emma for anything!!

Love you peaches, my little babushka!! You rock!
Love always! xoxoxoxoxoxox your Nana

LIFE IS A VERB- 37 Days To Wake up, Be Mindful, and Live Intentionally!

2008-10-23T03:34:00.000-07:00

I love new books. I ESPECIALLY love new books that fall into my lap at just the right time. Those are the kind of books that speak to my heart and soul and are so engrossing that I get up at 2am to sip my coffee, sit by the fire, and soak up the gifts that book brings to me. Perfect timing, perfect tidbits of wisdom.

I like books that challenge me to do more and be more than I currently am. I like books that inspire me to grow. I like books that are so relevant that I find myself talking outloud and almost having a conversation with the author while I am reading her musings.

One of the books that has captured me of late is "life is a verb" by Patti Dign.

In the book's prologue, Patti has a quote that really hit home for me:

Time only seems to matter when it is running out

-Peter Strup

She explains that on October 24th, 2003 her beloved step father was diagnosed with lung cancer. He died just thirty-seven days later. Patti helped him live, and helped him die, and afterwards she was left with this question:

What would I be doing today if I had only thirty-seven days to live?

This question has been on my heart. I recently have been to several funerals for several dear friends, both of whom died of breast cancer. Another dear friend I have known since high school, whose name is also Linda, is gravely ill and fighting for her life. My dear friend Lorie has cancer and just got back some positive scan results. I literally broke into sobs when I read her email to me. I felt like my heart would break if there was bad news for this mother of four precious children. I was so grateful to God that she had a step in a positive direction. Life is tenuous, life is precious. But it is easy to get caught up in the furious activity of life and forget the value of every day. Life is short and I want to live it fully!

But deep inside, truth be told, I know that we are all dying. Each day passes so quickly! The weeks fly by. Another fall is here and the gorgeous leaves are starting to drift quietly to the ground. I am 61. How many falls do I have left?

I recently went to a church conference with my beloved daughter Amy. I had an awesome time at the conference and even had a massage before we went. But when I looked at the picture of myself from the conference, I saw that even in all the fun and learnings...I looked weary.

It has been an emotional fall on many levels...visits from family, friends being ill, wonderful students, but an exhauting schedule. The word busy seems to come up in my daily conversations as a way to describe everything. Hmmmm...I wonder if my life is a bit unbalanced...again? :)

I want to hit the pause button of my life.

Tomorrow is October 24th, 2008. I will begin Patti Dign's challenge to take 37 days to explore and try on six practices:
intensity, inclusion, intimacy, intuition, and intention.

This book tells dynamic stories and has action challenges. It feels like the right book...for the right time in my life! It fits with the quote I love by by H.H. Williams that says...

"Furious activity is no substitute for understanding".

It's time to slow down the furious activity in my own life, take a breath, and grow in some new and challenging ways. I'll keep you posted on my learnings over the next 37 days!

God Bless!
Love Linda

TODAY'S LIFE LESSON: Don't Underestimate the Children of Today...a "Must See" For Every Teacher and Parent!

2008-10-19T07:05:00.000-07:00

Theresa Waco is one of my former students and we have stayed connected since she left SCC. She graduated from Gonzaga, got her Masters degree there, and she has been a special education teacher at Hamblin Elementary School for a number of years. Theresa is not just a former student, she is also my good friend.

She recently sent me this video clip, along with a personal message for me as her teacher. Both the clip and her message to me brought me to tears.This video clip, in my opinion, is a "must see" for every teacher, parent, grandparent, pastor...anyone who knows or works with children.

Children are insightful. They have messages we ALL need to hear. They are courageous and truth tellers! Hang on to your hats as you listen to one amazing young man who talked to the ENTIRE Dallas school district at their orientation! This made my day, my week, and my year!
THIS is why I am a teacher!

Enjoy!
God Bless!
Love Linda

http://www.dallasisd.org/keynote.htm

Wonderful Moments to Relish...Counting 13 Blessings!

2008-10-10T17:31:00.000-07:00

In times that are volatile and the stock market is going crazy, I love to sit by the fire and think about the constants in my life. These are blessings that bring me great joy, no matter what the outside world has going on.

Here are 13 blessings I am reminded of today:

1) Having Jacob overnight and making "real lemonade" from the lemons we grew in my sunroom. Jacob and Boppa now have a secret receipe that rivals any lemonade you can find in the country!

2) Going to Emma's soccer game and seeing her score 5, that's right 5 goals! She buzzed around the soccer field like a happy bee and made goal-making look easy. The grin on her beautiful face was priceless.!

3) Going to one of Zac's football games, or Kayla's soccer games, and see them play a sport that they love!

4) Seeing my new students get to really know each other and have fun in my class!

5) Holding Bert's hand as we walk anywhere that we are together. I adore that man!

6) Appreciating my healthy body. I have lost two friends to cancer in the last two weeks and I am going to a funeral tomorrow. I am so sad to lose Audrey and Dee and so blessed to have my health!

7) Loving my country and looking forward to casting my ballot in this election!

8) Going to the BBQ at Jacob's school and hearing him recite all the states in the union in less than 20 seconds!

9) Hearing the gospel choir at my church belt out the most amazing songs!

10) Hearing Amy or Jessi's voice on the telephone!

11) Having someone I care about comment on my blog!

12) Remembering that God loves me...no matter what!

May you count your blessings today!

God Bless!
Love linda

LOVE LIFE: Love Today, Even When It Is Confusing!

2008-10-04T03:06:00.000-07:00

"Here I am,
Where I ought to be."

-Louise Erdrich

This last week was wonderful and at the same time confusing. It seemed to be full of life lessons that came back for a "re-visit". My level of frustration was something I prayed about all week long. "Lord, give me patience"..."Hi! It's me again! :) ...please give me more patience." I often had a hard time rolling with the punches, some of the potholes in the road, changes in schedule, and unexpected events. I felt taken aback by some recent communication with people I care about and wondered.."What just happened here?" Why the bite in their tone with me? Was it me? Was it them?

While my "exterior, presented self" may have looked calm and collected, my "interior, real self" was in a fair amount of turmoil.

It's time to take stock of what happened this week. I literally ran all week. It's Saturday morning and I almost feel breathless.

Almost every day I got up at 3:00am to grade papers, and still couldn't get it all done quite the way I would have wanted. I ran to teaching , I ran to consulting, I just ran and ran. And while the week was full of blessings, growth and positives...there was an undercurrent of unrest and dis-ease.

I'm not sure if the floundering and sinking stock market, a "bailout" for large corporations who had poor money management, or listening to the Vice Presidential debate set the tone for the last few days. People at school reported having a somber attitude or were worried about if they would actually get to retire. Politics seemed at an all time low, and I felt if I saw another negative Dino Rossi commercial (or billboard) ...I would scream

I'm an independent voter and a political activist. I take voting very seriously. At 61 I have waited my whole life for a viable, smart, articulate female candidate, hopefully for President, but Vice President would work too. Having the current Republican candidate for Vice President be the chosen female voice is almost more than I can stand. This is someone who wanted to ban a book without reading it. This is someone who when asked about her running mate's credentials said, "I'll research that and get back to you." This is someone who, when well coached, can get through a debate, but chooses to answer only the questions she wants to answer. This is someone who, when talking off the cuff and isn't rehearsed , thinks "We might just have to go to war with Russia." This is someone who wants to continue the Iraq war until we have victory, no matter what it costs the American people. This is someone who is gutsy, true, but at the same time, in my opinion, not all that smart.

I wish my Mom, who was my role model for being a political activist, was alive so we could talk politics together and I could get her take on all of this.

I plan to vote for Senator Obama and Senator Biden, but I'd love to be voting for a smart female candidate too. They are out there and I hope their time comes during my lifetime.

When confusing and frustrating weeks happen, and like everyone else I have them, I try to get up early on a Saturday, fix myself a cup of coffee, sit in the quiet, have prayer time, and seek God's guidance. I then read my book called "Love Life!"

My quote for today is:

Here I am
Where I ought to be.

Darn it! I'm supposed to be where I am, learning these hard lessons. There is no escaping the truth. The life lessons fall as much during frustrating and confusing weeks as they do when things feel like smooth sailing...maybe even more. Every bump and pothole in the road, that jars me, is a chance to learn about flexibility, giving up control, trusting God, letting go of perfection, forgiving myself, forgiving others...the list is endless.

So for today ...I will take a deep breath, really taste this coffee, absorb the lessons, and let the week go. I will "let go and let God." I may even, on this rainy Saturday, take a nap by the fire!

And I'll trust that good week or confusing week... where I am is where I ought to be!

God Bless!
Love Linda

A SPARKLING LIFE LESSON: Love Life!..Love The Possibilities!

2008-09-27T06:05:00.000-07:00

Love Life!...Love the Possibilities!

You, Whose Day It Is,
Get Out Your Rainbow
Colors and Make It
Beautiful !

-Traditional Nootka Song

I LOVE the first week of a new school year, a week brimming over with new students, new questions, new beginnings, and new possibilities.

Every first week is "different" and has its own complexities. This one was no exception.

I love the diversity of my students! I have a class with four basketball players sitting across from a tatooed, pierced creative student, with a huge heart. He has green dreadlocks and from time to time wears a skirt. Watching the eyes of the basketball players look at him, and they know I'm watching them, is why I am at SCC! They are all God's children and if they can learn to appreciate each other's differences in my class, that may translate to being more tolerant and loving in the world outside my class!

Most of the week I ran like a chicken with my head cut off. And I do mean run!! Yet the running felt satisfying and made me chuckle! I kept thinking, and saying outloud..."This is the BEST job in the world!" And I mean it!

Here Are A Few Things I Loved About This Week:

*I loved seeing former students (some of whom I have again) and giving them a hug!

*I loved that most students could not believe that I am 61. Several even argued with me. I don't fit their stereotype of an "older person"!

*I loved welcoming students who were scared and alone.

*I loved seeing my favorite colleagues get out there and do their thing.

*I loved starting new units that I knew would change students' lives!

*I loved having clothes to wear at the start of school that are two sizes smaller than what I was wearing last year!

*I love being in shape mentally, physically, emotionally, and spiritually so I can give 110% every day to my students!

*I love learning all of their names so that I can greet them and recognize them in the hall!

*I love that my classes are brimming full and that there is only room to sit on the floor!

*I love that I am way more organized at the start of this school year than I was last year!

*I love that God has called me to do His work in a classroom, and that He has entrusted me with these precious people!

This first week, like any week, was full of new possibilities! Today is full of new possibilities too!

And as the Nootka song suggests...Today is my day..and I am getting out my rainbow colors and making it beautiful!!

I am so, so blessed, and I am so, so grateful! I'm living every day as if it was my last!

God Bless!
Love Linda

A CONVERSATION ABOUT RACE IN AMERICA: A Look At This Year's Election

2008-09-20T07:15:00.000-07:00

I am a white, 61 year old female who grew up in an affluent household in Seattle, Washington. I attended Roosevelt High School, graduated in 1965, and when you look at my year book (we called them annuals back then) you will see a sea of white faces, most of whom grew up in affluence like I did. Over 90% of my graduating class of 875 students went on to four year colleges and universities.

Now understand, I didn't know that we were affluent at the time. My parents worked very, very hard to give me the benefits of the "American Dream." They had not grown up in affluence, but they went to college, worked hard, and doors opened. I mistakenly believed, at the time, that everyone lived like I did. I wasn't naive or stupid, I just didn't "get" how my being white opened so many opportunities for me. I thought everyone was told from day one, "Of course you'll go to college. College comes after high school!"

I became a Christian at Malibu when I was 15, and this opened my heart to social justice issues for those less fortunate. During the race riots in Seattle, I was, much to my father's dismay, in a black church cleaning the pool they used for baptisms. Much of my life since then as an educator in a community college setting has been about serving others, not just myself. But can I really "get" what it is like for my sisters and brothers "of color"? Even though I attend a primarily African American church...I'm not so sure. I can hear the stories of my church family, and I can truly empathize with how hard it is, but do I get the daily journey they face? At 61, and after reading "Why Are All of the Black Kids Sitting Together in the Cafeteria?"... I think not.

This book is a mind twister, a heart hurter, and a "must read" more than once journey. It addresses the notion of "white privilege" in an articulate and perceptive fashion. It, along with a discussion on Racial Reconciliation with Scott Finnie last spring at a conference, has opened my eyes... again. As I watch this election unfold, and hear the media commentary, I am reminded of this book.

I never understood, and am only starting to understand now, how I have a daily privilege bestowed on me by the color of my skin. Now granted, I am female and have experienced gender bias. I have one hand and am used to looks and second looks. But I am white, and that is a different story altogether.

I am writing this blog post after reading another commentary about white privilege and how it is impacting this election. I am in no way an expert on this topic, however as someone who wants to reflect on this culture...here is another way to look at some current events.

It is certainly food for thought...about racism, double standards, white privilege, and how far we all still have to go until the "American Dream" is open to everyone!

If you want to learn more, check out this website:

http://www.redroom.com/blog/tim-wise/this-your-nation-white-privilege-updated

God Bless! Love Linda

BACK IN THE SADDLE AGAIN: School Starts for Me!

2008-09-17T03:04:00.000-07:00

In recent weeks I have watched my family head off to school and classes. Ryan started first, since his school district began classes at the end of August. His classroom was ready and he now has a wonderful group of new students. Likewise, Rog and Jessi went back and are in gear, Amy started her last class in graduate school at Gonzaga (she's working on her thesis for her Masters Degree), and even my grandchildren are "in the groove" with school.

While I worked all summer doing consulting, I had choices about the timing of my work schedule. I was blessed to have lots of good, challenging and exciting work to do for my clients. Yet hanging in the back of my mind was the task of getting myself "ready" to start a new school year!

One of the blessings of teaching college is that you get a fresh start each quarter, yet truth be told when I leave at the end of the year and students graduate, there are many loose ends that get left for "another day." :)

Well, the "another day" is here!

I spent much of yesterday sorting through old papers in my classroom, xeroxing materials for the first week, and throwing out things that I no longer need. I got a class list, searched for names of students I've had before (and there are lots of them), and started to refamiliarize myself with the curriculum and drill of starting again. It's truly a mix of feelings: anticipation, joy, and anxiety. Always, at the end of the first week and I know 90 new names, I feel like I am "back in the saddle again'...doing the job that God called me to do and that I LOVE doing.

I start this school year more than 50 pounds lighter and with even more positive energy!
We have two days of meetings (Thursday and Friday) and then Monday morning it all begins again!

I can't wait!

Loves and hugs to all who read this!
God Bless!
Love Linda