I am a broken person
and a resurrection person.
It's Easter Sunday and I am up to my hips in Easter baskets, stuffing Easter eggs and getting ready for our annual Easter dinner and Easter Egg hunt.
I can't wait.
Yet I have been restless most of the night and sleep
did not come easily. It hasn't come easily during much of Lent.
During these weeks of restlessness, I have been mindful of God the Father, mindful of Jesus, and I have been especially mindful of His Mama, Mary.
I've been mindful of the HUGE gift I was given
and how completely unworthy I am to receive it.
After all, I am such a broken person, someone who makes mistakes every day. I long to walk like Jesus walked and talk like Jesus talked...but I fall so short.
I make so many mistakes.
While some don't like this language, it fits for me. I am a sinner! No doubt about it. Every.single.day. I mess up.
Yet here is what just blows me away, while I was messed up, broken and a sinner, God sent His son Jesus to die for me.
Seriously. For me.
God gave me a do-over when He sent Jesus to die for my sins. God gave me a fresh start and forgiveness beyond measure.
Love so unspeakable, peace so unbelievable.
Unconditional love. The gift of Jesus was a gift of unconditional love.
God loved me so much that He gave me a clean slate.
I was and I am... forgiven.
What a gift!
Mind you, I LOVE gifts. I love giving just the right gift that will "knock your socks off," as my Grandma used to say.
I love having my beloveds look at the gift, well up in tears, and know that I know them so well that the gift fit a perfect spot in their heart.
I am so keenly aware today that this is exactly what God did in the gift of Jesus.
Jesus is the ultimate "knock your socks off" gift.
*He knows me (check).
*He sees inside my heart and knows what I need.
*He gives a gift freely out of love(check).
But this gift, yes THIS gift, wasn't wrapped in pretty paper with a big red bow.
This gift was wrapped in pain and sorrow and betrayal and a cross.
"Love so amazing, so divine, demands my soul my life my all"...as the hymn says.
Jesus, who was fully human and fully God, was the gift, the sacrifice.
Plain and simple, He died for me and He died for you.
And oh how His Heavenly Father must have grieved
to give up His son and see His son on that cross.
And oh how sweet Mary, the earthly mother of Jesus, must have wept to lose her beloved son and see Him on that cross. How could she bare it. Her heart so broken.
And oh how awful and painful and heartbreaking it must have been for Jesus to die on that cross, His last words being "Forgive them Father, for they know not what they do."
And oh how God was glorified when Jesus rose from the dead and was resurrected. A new beginning.
So this Easter morning I am so acutely aware of ALL these gifts, gifts for me.
Gifts for you.
And as I sit here this morning crying as I type out each word, what I know for sure is that we all need a resurrection, a new beginning, forgiveness, a do over.
We all need the gift that God gave us in Jesus.
the best present ever. The gift that keeps on giving.
The gift that cost everything. Priceless.
And I am so grateful that my heart will almost explode. To be loved like that...well, it takes my breath away.
The hymn was right...it demands my soul, my life, my all.
Love you all to the moon and back!
"We are all just walking each other home." ...