Sunday, April 13, 2014

Taking My Fear to God...the "What If?" Moments...

Note: Think Ella Fitzgerald or Willie Nelson singing this song...feel free to tap your
foot or move your head or sway back and forth with your eyes closed...

Blue Skies 
smiling at me....
Nothing but blue skies
Do I see.

Blue Birds
singing a song
Nothing but blue birds
All day long.
                       - Lyrics to the song "Blue Skies" written by Irving Berlin, 1926

I love old classic anythings. Classic music, classic clothing, classic furniture, classic literature, classic books you can hold in your hand. I grew up in the age of vinyl records and enduring musicals. As a child I used to put on programs and sing songs like: 

where the winds come sweeping down the plains
and the waving wheat can sure smell sweet 
when the winds come right behind the rain.

every night my honey lamb and I
sit alone and talk
and watch a hawk
making lazy circles in the sky."

Note:  This may scare you a bit, but I am remembering these lyrics without having
to look them up! :)

And then...drum roll...from the musical South Pacific (Mary Martin and Enzio Pinza played the leads)

"I'm going to wash that man right out of my hair
I'm going to wash that man right out of my hair
I'm going to was that man right out of my hair
And send him on his way."

Music helps to set my mood. I play it at home, I play it at school.
It can change my attitude in a heart-beat. 

Lately I've been working on, praying about, and intentionally seeking, with God's help, to uplift my attitude.

I know that when I worry, or live in fear, my positive attitude and trust in God takes a back seat.
Fear is in the driver seat and my attitude is just a passenger in the vehicle.

I know that "worry isn't prayer,"as my youngest daughter reminds me of that regularly.

I know in my heart-of-hearts that "God's got this!" and I trust that He does. 

I know that this is Lent and giving up things and concentrating on what the Lord has done for me often leaves me a bit sad or contemplative.

Yet while I know these things, at times I get stuck in worry.
 Even though I know God is in control my mind often races and plants itself into the

"What if ?" moments....

Those "what if?" moments are laced in fear
They often come from wanting to control outcomes
(can I hear an "Amen" on the control issue?)
They often diminish my life and sap my energy.

If my Mom was alive, she'd tell you we come from a long line of "worriers."
It almost sounds like it's genetic. My DNA has fear as a part of its makeup.
That's a nice way of saying that while we talk about trusting God, and come
to Him in prayer, I often take back whatever I've just given Him and say...

"OK, God..I know you are Almighty, the Maker of Heaven and Earth. I know You hold us all in the
palm of Your hand...but I don't think you are big enough or strong enough or wise enough
to handle __________________. (fill in the blank with any problem I worry about and am fearful about)" so I have to take that back and worry and stew about it.

I am sick and tired of doing this.
Let me say that again, with more resolve...

I am sick and tired of doing this!

I've felt led, little-by-little, to take those fear-filled, worry-laced moments to God, give them to Him, and to turn on my prayer life and turn on music that is uplifting and inspiring instead of worrying myself sick. 

Music, fun music, gospel music... often seems to lift my life from worry to confidence...
just like that!

I remember when I first sang the song "How Great Thou Art" at Malibu, a Young Life camp. I couldn't stop crying. Tears cascaded down my face. I was in 9th grade, gave my heart to Jesus, and knew He would take me and love me, just as I am. Even when I was a hot mess of fear, He would be there. He IS big enough and great enough to take it all and handle it all. The song goes like this...

Oh Lord my God,
When I in awesome wonder 
Consider all
The worlds Thy hands have made.

I see the stars
I hear the rolling thunder
Thy power throughout
the universe displayed.

Then sings my soul
My Savior God to me
How Great Thou Art,
how Great Thou art....

(and thank the Lord, I remember those lyrics as well! They are deep in my heart)

PS- My dear friend Peggy Sue sent this rendition of How Great Thou Art to me. Thanks, Peggy Sue!
Get some kleenex before you watch it. What a blessing!

Easter is next week. It is almost resurrection time. God died for my sins and Jesus rose from the dead
and I don't have to worry or be fearful... God does have this!...

so there, fear and worry... TAKE THAT!

I am praying that God will resurrect  my attitude and take it from worry to trust in Him. As the sun shines more and more in Spokane, the clouds roll away, and the blue skies are smiling on me in all their glory...I'll seek to remember where those "Blue Skies" truly come from.

Do you ever worry? Does fear sometimes rule your life? Do you have any tips for how to stop worrying? Please feel free to share them. I'd love any suggestions you use to keep fear and worry in the back seat of the car and having trust in God doing the driving!

God Bless!
Love, Linda

1 comment:

Peggy Sue said...

I do worry...and yet somehow I know...all is as it should be. Today my father in-law said, But you wonder why such awefull things happen? My reply, The lord doesn't intervene. Life is life, and we as humans make the choice's. From these choice's come good or bad consequences...from them we learn..and the biggest learning tool...??? Tends to be pain...and in those moments of greatest pain, there was one person standing always next to me...GOD. Therefore I know he is..and Life and it's anxiety and pain...brings me closer to only him. I love this version of the song...and wanted to share. Beautiful post as always Linda. just beautiful!!!

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