Friday, November 18, 2016
Singing a "Broken Hallelujah"...
"I have seen that after every devastating loss,
there comes at last, because of God's grace and
what I have learned, a stunning "win" of some
kind. And when that win arrives, it is more than
wrapped in ribbons and bows. It is accompanied
by shooting stars. And then I do not shout,
"Thank you, God," I whisper it. My gratitude
reverberates softy through my entire being."
I have been through some hard seasons in these sixty nine years. Some very hard seasons. Yet one of my dear students said yesterday, "Linda, it seems like you have it all together, you rely on God and you have learned all the lessons. It seems like everything is easy."
Rely on God, yes.
Everything is easy? Not so much.
Plain and simple this has been a hard, hard season.
One of the hardest in my life. As I said to one of my dear, life-long friends, "I wish I could fix this. I wish I could have had this happen to me so I could shoulder the unimaginable grief one of my "dearies" is feeling."
Side note: My Nana referred to those she loved as her "dearies" or her "lovies." Those folks who had her heart. Those folks she would have done anything for. Like my Nana, I use that same term to describe the precious, precious people in my life.
And while I cannot go into all the details, some of my dearies are in such pain and anguish. And it has been ongoing. Bert and I pray every day for healing and God's strength and wisdom to walk this uncharted road with them.
We are clinging to God and His truth for our lives.
What we know for sure is:
He will see us through.
He is there in the midst of the hard and very hard.
He weeps with us over this hurt.
He holds us up when we can barely put one foot in front of the other.
He is our rock and our fortress and our strength to do this comes from Him.
So back to what my dear student said...
I have never felt I have it "all together" and right now I especially can't even imagine what that would be like. Nor have I learned all the lessons. Not even close.
Yet what I am so, so grateful for in this season
is that I don't have to know how to navigate all of this. God knows, but I don't. He will guide me as I seek counsel in His word and when I hold my breath and utter three words,
"Please help Lord!"
And as Thanksgiving approaches? How can I feel gratitude in the midst of such pain?
As I focus on God and His love, His light pierces the darkness. His love is overwhelming. His peace is sustaining. No matter how hard things are, I will sing a Broken Hallelujah. I will turn to Him for my strength and honor every amazing blessing He has brought into my life.
No matter what, the best Thanksgiving gift of all is God's love.
That's a rock I can stand on.
That's the "win" after the storm.
That's the knowing that I am not alone in all of this.
The very God that created Heaven and Earth is by my side and the side of my "dearies."
Just knowing that changes everything and allows me to say, "Thank you God, even for this hurt, as it is teaching me to rely on You."
At this time of Thanksgiving, may you know that God loves you and that He will sustain you and be with you, no matter what!
Love and hugs and prayers!
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